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Author Topic: Can anyone help me or at least offer me some advise PLEASE !!!!!!!  (Read 2784 times)


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My name is JC and I live in Phoenix. I am trying to get some help with a problem or even just some advise on where to start. I am hoping someone can answer some questions for me.

My wife (we are still legally married) has given temporary custody of our son, age 3, to her mother who resides in Tampa, FL. This was done without my knowledge or permission. I was NEVER served with any documents from this proceeding.

The temporary custody was granted for a period of 60 days, to begin on February 10, 2204. No new documents have been filed with the court (as of Friday, April 16, 2004). I believe my wife is not in the state of FL. and that she has come back to AZ and left our son in Florida. She has told me that she is in Florida but her mother will not allow her to live at her house she says she's living with someone else. I have no phone number for her or address. She has given me a cell phone # for her that has a North Carolina area code. She said she got the phone when she was there in January visiting her sister. I have been able to locate on the internet an address for her mother in Tampa. She just bought a home there late last year.

I would like to go to FL. to get my son.

I do not have a lot of money. I cannot afford an attorney, hotel and food costs and the air fare to go down there and back with my son if my mother-in-law tries to fight me for my son. I am trying to find out if the temporary custody order in Florida did expired on April 10, 2004, does she have any legal right to stop me from taking my son?

This is the 3rd time my wife has taken off with our son. Each time she deposits him with her mother. She does this to get back at me because I will not get back together with her.

In January 2003, my wife took off with our son to CA. She filed in CA for custody of our son. I was never served with any of these documents or ever given and address or phone number in CA where was son was. The CA. court awarded her custody as long as she and the baby are in the state of CA. From January 2003 - August 2003 I only spoke to my son on a hand full of occasions when my wife would call me but she would block the number so I could never call her back. My wife was living with her mother in CA. In March 2003 they moved from Camarillo, CA. to San Diego, CA. Once in San Diego, her mom threw her out of the house for a large array of reasons. She lived on the streets from May 2003 on until August 2003. She would go visit our son about once a week and take him overnight for a visit. They would stay in hotel rooms that were rented by men she had met on the street or over the internet.

In August on 2003, my wife decided she was going to bring our son to AZ. where I live, for a 5 day visit. I bought them plane tickets. When she called her mother to let her know that she would be coming to pick up the baby for this visit, her mother took off with our son to FL for 4 days without my wife's permission. My wife went ahead and flew here to AZ so that we could figure out what to do. When she knew her mother was back at home in CA. with the baby, my mom drove her to CA to get him. At this time my wife stated that she wanted to move back to AZ. with him so that he could be close to me. She went to her mom's house pretending to take the baby for the night for a visit like always. She and my mom drove back to AZ with the baby. She and my son stayed at my mom's house and my apartment for a week. During this week we found out that she was meeting up with drug dealers and planning to sneak back out of state with my son when she realized I had no intention of us getting back together.

My mom threw her out of her house because of her talking to drug dealers on my mom's phone (my mom records all phone conversations in and out of her house). My son happened to be with me that afternoon. My wife did not even call to check on our son for over 6 weeks. We had no phone number for her or ANY idea of where she was staying. This all happened in August 2003, then in October 2003 she called and wanted to see the baby. She would not give me a phone to contact her or any information on where she was living. From August 2003 until January 2004, our son lived with me. She would spend about 1 hour with him. More times then not, she would spend 15 minutes with her son and the rest of the time trying to talk to me about us getting back together. Also, during this time period her mom came to AZ. to try to get the baby back. She paid a guy $100 to come to my apartment and pretend to be a police officer and take my son from me. This person took the $100 and then took off. He never came to my apartment. He called me and told me what they had done. The very next night someone kicked in my front door and tried to get into my apartment. I chased the man down 3 flights of stairs and part way through the parking lot of the apartment complex. I was only in my underwear and did not chase him any farther. I moved the next weekend and would not give my new home address to my wife for fear that she would try something again. She had my phone number and could contact me through either of my parents if she could not reach me.

The reason I am trying so hard to get information immediately is...in January 2004 during a routine visit at the park for my wife to visit with our son, my wife snatched him. She threw him into the back of a moving vehicle. I have not seen or even spoken to my son since January 7th. Last Friday I learned that she has taken him to FL. (where her mother has now moved to) and has left him with her mother. She went to court and gave her mom temporary custody. She never tried to serve me with these documents from FL. She has my phone number and my mom's address and my dad's address. The 60 day temporary custody was up on April 10th. I have a home and am willing and able to care for my son. Since my wife and I are still legally married, I do not think she has the right to sign over custody to her mom. I do not have a lot of money to go to FL to fight that order. Can anyone let me know if there is ANYTHING that can be done about the FL. order? I can send you any documents you need to support what I have said.

My wife is bi-polar and should take medication for this disorder but she refuses. Many doctors have written her prescriptions and she just does not take them.

In a MSN profile I found of hers from AFTER she took our son, all she talks about is finding someone to party with and finding someone that can keep up with her. And for a picture she choose to use on there, she has a picture of her and MY SON. I am terrified of the people she keeps company with. I can only imagine what was happening in those hotel rooms in CA when those men would rent the rooms for her. She called me a few times from there and when I would ask to speak to our son she would tell me that he was at the pool with who ever the guy was.

I know I have not handled things with her the best I could, but I NEVER gave my son away to anyone else to care for. My son's bedroom is still exactly as it was the day he left here in January for that visit with her. He is my life.

PLEASE HELP ME !!!! I love my son and feel that he is being abandoned. I am afraid he thinks I don't love him or want him. I am a good dad.

As this is the 3rd time my son has been taken from me by her and her mother, I am VERY frightened that if her mother gets wind that I know my son is in FL with her or that I have her home address, she will have my wife come and get him and take him to another family member in another state. It has taken me 4 months to track my son to FL. I was able to find my mother-in-law's address on the internet from where they bought their home and in doing a search on the internet for my wife's name or my son's name I could not locate anything. The court papers have her first name spelled incorrectly. I was able to find the court documents under her mother's name, other wise I would still not know what she had done.

The police were called back in January when this started but by the time they arrived she and my son had slipped out the back door of the house. The police officer searched the house and confirmed that they were indeed gone. The officer stated that since we are still legally married they would not be able to take our son from her unless she were to break a law. But, he also stated that if she removed our son from the state of Arizona without my permission she could be arrested but that we would have to have proof that he was out of Arizona. Has she indeed broken any kind of law by taking him across state lines without my permission? After the abduction in January she did not contact me until some time in February. She called me to say if I wanted to ever see my son again I would have to meet with her first. We set several times to meet and talk and each time she would cancel or just not show.

My wife has been calling me again the last couple of nights (she says she wants us to be friends). She told me during these conversations that her family does not know she is talking to me. She also indicated that she is not living at her mothers but that is where our son is. She said her mother will not allow her to stay there. I do not believe she is in Florida, I think she is back here in Arizona.

I've been tape recording the conversations between us. I want to be able to prove that I have spoken with her and that I have told her that I want my son returned. Well, the other night she told me that her mother had paid someone to break into my apartment and try to take my son. She also stated that her mother had paid someone to impersonate a police officer and come to my door and act like he was sent to get the baby. The guy I guess took the $100. but never came to the apartment. I do not know what to do with this information.

I called the police last night with the proof that she has taken him out of state. They told me the only I can do is file a complaint.

Thank you,



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RE: Can anyone help me or at least offer me some advise PLEASE !!!!!!!
« Reply #1 on: May 08, 2004, 08:21:32 PM »
I am so sorry you have to go thru this.

I am not that familar with Florida laws, but I think POC is who goes into chat.

I think you should also post this on Soc's Board, I am sure he can give you some advice on what to do.


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RE: Can anyone help me or at least offer me some advise PLEASE !!!!!!!
« Reply #2 on: May 09, 2004, 04:56:03 PM »
You need to interview a number of atty's , You will find some one that is knowledgeable and capable to help. Only from the scuttle I have heard while at My atty's office , I believe that You need to go file for custody , Where Juridiction is , Or just go to the place where your son is and file an ex parte order Saying you get custody , What I do know is that You have a few problems ,  One will be fileing in the proper jurisdiction , The other locating your son , The next will be getting the court to believe your story , Usually there is   a Guardian Ad Litem Appointed , And the Guardian ad Litem Will have to be the one that reports to the court , the Judge won't be likely to Just believe your story .  So there will have to be a court date , Mom or the persion with custody will have to be served with the right papers ,She will have the oppurtunity to show Up at court , And Her custody filing should be public record  And have her address on it , when I suggest several things that I have read and seen happen ,  I will keep it to the point , Call these people or go there and ask for low cost legal help ,With pen and paper in hand always ,
    Try going to child support [Wash state] they have low cost legal help Pamphlets ask for them In your state . Call every number ask, be patient
 Go or call the court and ask if there is a night when atty's help people pro se ,
  Or a list of atty;s that help people with  low income
 Call the BAR association in you state ask for low cost atty's . or pro se / pro bono Help

Call Child protective services , If you really believe Your son is in danger  , And ask what they can do ,
  Go get your son and bring him back , I suggest asking an atty , they won't be likely to Advise this . But If You have good reasons to believe that your son is in danger ,, There is a fine line between negligence on your part , And Gettting your self in trouble ,

 Finally there is so much BS that goes on in child custody cases that You have Document every piece of evidence You can , That really means police reports , What ever is proof , You Need real legal advice , I'm just giving you Ideas ,the court will have to see pretty good evidance to do what you want them to , But then again if you file for custody and or a parenting plan and it gets filed then You have legal recourse for her taking the child away with out notification . This about the Uniform Child Custody act ,. l It say's there must be a parenting plan ,It states that the moving parent must give notice of where they are moving by court order ,You need to get an order filed so you can proceed with contempt for her leaving the area and not giving a forward address. I really hope this gives you some good Ideas , I admit I know very little about Your problem , But I do know in order for you to get any legal advantage there at least needs to be  Parenting plan filed and accepted by the court ,you need legal advice


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