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The nerve...

Started by dontunderstand, Jul 20, 2005, 11:16:40 PM

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dontunderstand

DH, SD and DD were in a car accident 2 days ago.  DH was hurt, but not to terribly and girls were fine, a HUGE blessing!  We called BM to let her know what happened and that all was well.  She calls almost 2 hours later to see if SD was okay.  SD tells her that she "hurt her back a little" and that she had a headache (that she had complained about in the morning) we asked the girls 4 different times if they were hurting anywhere "NO" also had them do the neck back check, nothing.  Of course now this is a HUGE deal.  BM's mom calls, now it is apparently SD back, neck and head and they need to pick up SD immediately! (30 min until end of visit) DH called BM explained that she was fine and told her all that we did.  BM told SD to tell us that she needed ice pack and headache meds until she got here.  I gave her some children's advil and an ice pack and talked to her about lying.  She finally admitted that she lied to her mom and that she was not hurt.  BM shows up 10 min. LATE, (where is all that concern?) she BANGS on the door snatches SD (SD is 7 and she still carries her like she is 1 or 2)  I ask SD if there is something she has to say to BM.  She tells her, BM ignores us and leaves.  I ran outside to tell her that I gave SD some advil so don't give her anymore.  This IDIOT tells me SD is allergic to ibuprofin.  DO YOU THINK YOU COULD HAVE TOLD US THIS?  
DH calls to check on SD yesterday and finally he talks to BM's mom she tells him that SD broke out in a rash they gave her allergy meds and she is okay, but watch what we give her...eeeggghhhh.  (granted it was 40 min before mom came and another 20 min home before the "rash" showed up?...I don't think so!)  He asked to have SD call, no return call, suprise!
We got SD today so I asked her if she got a rash.  She says "no" "well I got some bumps right here (under armpit) and right here on my face (chin) she had a good rest of the visit as she usually does.  She even told her therapist today that she "loves it when she spends time with dad, SM and SS."  Pretty interesting for someone that "misses home so much she doesn't like to spend time at your house"  HAHAHA...
Thanks for letting me vent... this is just one piece to the series of unfortunate events that we experience here ;)

joni


Yeah...I feel for you.  Sick, maternal sense of entitlement.  The problem with these children are it creates their dysfunction.  They know what to say to these sick parents to make them happy.  SD knew BM would get off hearing she didn't feel well.  It would make her feel needed.  SICK

dontunderstand

I think even more than that, SD feels like the only time BM gives her  any attention is when she is "sick" As a matter of fact, when she was talking to her mom on the phone she was telling BM I just need some tylenol and some benedryl and I will be okay...What?  How does this 7 year old know the names of the medicine in the 1st place and 2nd going to tell her mom when she THINKS she needs them. I know my 6 yr old refers to meds as "do I have to take the pink one?"  It is also funny to me that she is so "ill" (ALL  THE TIME) at home and she has yet to have one of her MANYailments here...the all time most rediculous is BM's "reasoning" for SD being absent 60 times (40 tardies) last school year is becasue "she has beeen sick alot"  Me thinking, "no, YOU are just sick in the head."

MYSONSDAD

It is Maternal Gatekeeping.

Got one just like her. Runs our son to the doctor, claims all kinds of crap, but never has the proof. Makes it up as she goes....


"Children learn what they live"

dontunderstand

To me that is mental/emotional abuse of the worst kind.  How come we are all over physical abuse and yet mental abuse is 10x worse becasue the "bruises" never heal and we do NOTHING?

gipsy

I have been through all this , But the difference I My atty told Me to make an appointment with the doc , And BE NICE and review the medical record >: Of course there was no such " MILK Allegries " Or any other thing she accusee me of  , I filled out a form and requested copies of the Medical record , And sent My reply to her atty with the medical record along with a copy Of psycho mom's  ridicolous letter making allegations of Milk Poisening , Food allergies , And Things I did against alledged Doctors orders , Of course the medical record proved she was Lying ,
  But Before I responded I took My atty's advice and got the medical record ,
   She also tried  other stunts , I took the  letter from the doctor too the doctor , This letter said , My son was not supposed to be going any where because of an Illness , I also showed the Doctor the letter the mother sent through her atty making these allegations . Again the doctor said He did not write any letter with the intent to stop My son from coming over for visitation , But the mother had told him a different story , So the end result is . I have been very nice to the doctor , And didn't try to involve Him, I just asked about the record , and what the letter was for , . now the doctor and the nurses are pretty much on My side and Have voiced that , They tend to be nice and just give me the info , They think she is a real dork , I never said any thing bad about the mother !