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Regarding childrens internets accounts

Started by I cry_ in_the_dark, Apr 04, 2006, 05:23:07 PM

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I cry_ in_the_dark

My children, more specifically my 15yo daughter, have several accounts on the internet, including an email account, a messaging account, and an account for a gaming site. These accounts were all created over 2 1/2 years ago while in my primary custody. I now have joint legal custody, him having primary physical.

When these accounts were made, it was with the understanding I would always have the passwords so that I could monitor the accounts for "appropriate behavior". As well, when she was unable, I would take care of the gaming account as needed when my daughter couldn't (a pet that has to be fed).

Over the last two years since dad gained primary custody, we were aware that they had a password program with which they gained access to my kids accounts. I always told them not to worrry, as we never bad-mouthed them or did anything inappropriate that we needed to be concerned about. If they want to read our conversations or view our emails, I had no problem with it, so neither should they.

Dad (more-so step mom) has repeatedly, over the years, taken things we have said and screwed the words around to suit their fancy or attempt to cause problems, i.e. most recently, "Why did you're mom go away with her boyfriend for the weekend instead of coming to see you?????" (Regardless of whether or not it was my "boyfriend" it was a short day and a half trip (2 hour drive) vs. driving 10 hours to see my kids and driving back 10 hours to home. Almost impossible for someone to do in 36 hours.)

For totally unrelated reasons, my daughter was again grounded at her dad's house. Of course she is grounded from the computer, which means once again we cannot talk free of charge (perhaps you recall the cell phone issue when I moved). As well, she heard her dad and step mom talking about changing her passwords on the computer so she could no longer access her accounts.

She called me last night, and advised me of all this and requested I change all of her passwords so that I would have them as is usual. For what ever reason, they attempted to get into her accounts today and obviously could not.

I'm not sure why, but they are irate. I have viewed these accounts, regularly, and there is nothing in any of them of any concern. They have told HER that if I do not provide the passwords they will seek legal action and throw me in jail etc. Of course they have not said one word to me. My girl is so upset that I am concerned she may even be suicidal, even tho I have assured her that she has nothing to worry about. She called me again this afternoon and advised me they did in fact, call their lawyer.

1. Do I, in fact have anything to worry about?





socrateaser

>1. Do I, in fact have anything to worry about?

Interesting problem. If the account is the child's, then either parent can instruct the child as to the use of the account, because the parents have joint custody of the child. And, either parent can instruct the child to restrict the other parent, or conversely, to permit access to themselves, because each parents has custody.

Neither parent has any power to order the other parent to remain out of the account, because both parents have joint custody, and therefore joint control over the accounts. So, here, you have no liability.

However, if the account is the other parent's, i.e., because the parent set it up and provided access to the child, then that would give the parent control, and if you were to use the account, that would make you a trespasser to chattel and subject to liability -- and visa versa were the account set up by you.

 On your facts, you set the accounts up, so legally, you have control and the other parent is a trespasser to chattel if he interferes with your use.