Thanks for all your input and suggestions. Yes, there are some other issues and details. Approximately a month ago, it was brought to our attention that there was some inappropriate behavior between my daughter (6) and my fiancee's oldest son (12) which occurred last year. This has really gotten my ex fired up and she called in child services. They conducted and investagation and determined that it was just that - inappropriate behavior (nothing of a criminal nature) and that both children should see a counselor. Needless to say, those steps were already put in place before the investigation has been completed. My ex issued me a letter asking that I keep my daughter away from him for the time being while this investigation is occurring - which I have indicated I would. She is still hell bent on this issue and is either going to use it to her advantage to gain additional custody or use it to mess with his life.
The initial reason for the her trying to change the agreement was she felt that the kids needed a more stable environment - "a place to call home" in her words. Not having mommy's home and daddy's home. She is also trying to argue that I am withholding information from her. The current plan had been working fine for well over a year and once I started getting involved in my relationship and stopped talking to her is when all this started brewing.
Now it is slowly becoming a reality that I will probably have to make a choice between my kids and fiancee. What my ex is currently looking for is to change from a 50/50 situation to one where I would have the kids every other weekend during the school year and every other week during the summer. I have thought this over time and time again and I do not want to end my relationship with my fiancee. It is my opinion that even if I do this and try to start another relationship down the road, the ex will somehow put the kids in the middle of this again and try to keep me from living my life. I know I am in a tough situation, as I have heard this from so many people. I have never put myself first in anything that I have ever done and I just can't take that anymore. I need to be happy as well. With that said, I'm thinking about giving in to this new agreement she is looking for as long as my fiancee and I can get to a point that is acceptable for both of us. She is in the middle of this as well and is tired of all the problems my ex is causing. Just thinking that this could be a way for us to get some peace and stop the madness of my ex.
The initial reason for the her trying to change the agreement was she felt that the kids needed a more stable environment - "a place to call home" in her words. Not having mommy's home and daddy's home. She is also trying to argue that I am withholding information from her. The current plan had been working fine for well over a year and once I started getting involved in my relationship and stopped talking to her is when all this started brewing.
Now it is slowly becoming a reality that I will probably have to make a choice between my kids and fiancee. What my ex is currently looking for is to change from a 50/50 situation to one where I would have the kids every other weekend during the school year and every other week during the summer. I have thought this over time and time again and I do not want to end my relationship with my fiancee. It is my opinion that even if I do this and try to start another relationship down the road, the ex will somehow put the kids in the middle of this again and try to keep me from living my life. I know I am in a tough situation, as I have heard this from so many people. I have never put myself first in anything that I have ever done and I just can't take that anymore. I need to be happy as well. With that said, I'm thinking about giving in to this new agreement she is looking for as long as my fiancee and I can get to a point that is acceptable for both of us. She is in the middle of this as well and is tired of all the problems my ex is causing. Just thinking that this could be a way for us to get some peace and stop the madness of my ex.