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We have been making 'payments' towards the receipts.
 Example if she gives us the receipt with in 30 days of the time she paid. We pay in full with in 30 days.
 BUT If she holds onto a bunch of receipts over a 90 day period.
And the total of the receipts are $300.00. We are responsible for $150.00
We will give her $50.00 a month and it will be paid with in 90 days.

That way she can't claim we are not paying.
Hopefully, if she ever brought it up in court, it won't look bad on our part. Because like you said, ......,if she wants to be paid sooner ~ turn in the receipts with in 30 days.



Thanks!

We do not plan on taking CP to court on this.
Just curious and want to protect ourselves.

Didn't know if CP can hold on to the receipts and give them to us all at once and expect full payment immediately. If we pay them over a reasonable amount of time(same amount she had to pay them or held on to them) we won't be held in contempt.

As for the savings account idea.
We are living on a pretty tight budget right now, but in a few months that will change. So that's a good idea to keep in mind.
Thank You

"As for the stuff that goes to collections, you can fight that. I believe it's the Fair Credit Reporting Act that governs this stuff. If you didn't take the child to the doctor and therefore sign for responsibility -- you have a leg to stand on. The person who took the child to the doc needs to use the family court system to get reimbursed."

If CP takes the Child to the Doctors and signs for responsibility. The Medical bill is sent to collections for non payment by CP.
Why would the CP need to use the Family Court System for reimbursement from NCP?

I don't understand.

I know late fees and interest fees from late payments by CP are not the NCP responsibility.

In our court order it just states CP is to give NCP receipts in a timely manner and NCP is responsible for 50%.
That's it.

I called the clerk of the district court to find out if 30 days from the time of received receipt, is considered a reasonable time for reimbursement . They said yes.
But now that CP is holding onto the receipts for 60 to 90 days and then giving them to use all at once.
I believe we have the same amount of time to reimburse CP. Making payments towards the receipts and having them paid in full with in 60 to 90 days.

That's my opinion.

Custodial Parent is required to submit daycare and out of pocket medical receipts to non custodial parent for reimbursement of 1/2.

What is considered a timely manner for Custodial parent to submit receipts to non custodial parent?

The reason I ask is the Custodial Parent has been holding on to monthly daycare receipts & medical receipts  for over a 90 day period and submitting them all at once and Custodial Parent expects payment of 1/2 immediately.

Many medical/Dental bills are sent to collections before being paid by custodial parent. ( medical bills are anywhere from $20.00 to $60.00)


The receipts do get reimbursed for 1/2 but over a period of 90 days.

If/When Custodial parent does submits a receipt within 30 days of payment, the receipt is reimbursed for the 1/2 due by non custodial parent with in 30days.

Child Support of over $300.00 is current, not in rear-age, and is paid bi monthly on a regular basis.

What is considered a timely manner to submit receipts?

Is the custodial parent allowed, in the courts eyes, to hold on to the receipts for so long?

We have done the counseling with SD. She was in counseling for over 6 months and would never talk to the counselor.

There is, we think , no proof, Domestic violence at BM's house. None here.
Hurting yourself or others is not allowed in our home.

We have been doing what you suggested Below.

First, I wouldn't simply refuse visitation. Rather, I would sit down with SS and explain that you really want him to come to your house, but that his behavior does not meet with your expectations. Then lay out the rules very clearly - possibly written down so he can see them as well as hear them (for many kids, getting a message only by voice doesn't work very well). Then, whe he acts up, tell him it's time to go back to BM and cite the specific rule he has violated. Then let him come again next time. Go through the process a few time before giving up and banning him entirely.

The problem with this is BM will refuse to take SD when she has hurt her younger siblings. She won't answer her phone or say she is too busy to take SD.

I think a Psychologist is our only option right now. BM will not agree to it.
SD has soo much anger and I believe a lot of PAS. BM tells SD that we love the younger two more than her
and a lot of other junk.

I think we are going to have to cut back on visitation until BM agrees to professional intervention.

Thank You ....for everyone's advice.
 We live in Nebraska.
DH can only take his daughter in for emergency medical treatment and has to notify BM immediately.

We went through a program before that covered 100% of  counseling. Not a psychologist. We have to get everything pre approved for that through the insurance and only a certain number of visits are covered.
there is out of pocket expenses for this as well.

Which is no problem..but we have to get it pre approved for her to even see a psychologist. therefore making it not an emergency.

Luckily SD has not done anything serious, like you mentioned above.
Right now she's aggressive and a bully.

I will defiantly keep after the school.


I have kept years of documentation...Just in case!

Dh & I have made plans to spend time with SD with out the other kids.
Until we can get her in to see a psychologist or get something done through the school.

I fully understand that if SD hurts someone There could be a law suit.
Dh and I have years, not months of efforts on our part trying to help SD.

We've , not BM, has put SD into counseling. But BM has hindered all efforts to get SD the help she needs. We have numerous emails to prove this.

Every effort we make though the schools or legal courts, BM claims DH is just doing this to gain custody and  to not pay child support.

Since SD was 3 years old she has been an aggressive child.
Are hands are tied and I HAVE to look out for the best interest of my two little ones. They are MY main priority. I am scared my little ones are the ones who will be seriously injured if this continues.

My Dh is the NCP and his hands are tied. We exhausted every avenue.

If BM is faced with some serious consequences, then maybe something will finally be done to help SD.
I truly fear SD teenage years if something doesn't happen soon.

Thanks for you insight.

unfortunately,
 I think that's what it is going to take for BM  to wake up and smell the coffee.

The school hasn't been much help. BM makes up excuses why SD is acting this way and all is forgiven

She's in the 4th grade now, It will get worse in her teen years if something isn't done soon.

Thank You Again!

We did do that at one time, refused visitation, to get Bio-mom to agree to letting SC to see a counselor when she was with us.
SC was hurting our youngest on a consistent basis. Now SC is getting sneaking about it.

Hate to do it, but it looks like we may have to do it again. Refuse visitation until SC sees a psychologist.
We love SC very much but she needs help with her anger. Our insurance covers it.

Bio-mom does not have any other children, so she does not see the aggression first hand towards other children. Even though it happens at school, Bio-mom says it's never SC fault.

Bio-mom will eventually comply, Having SC 100% of the time will interfere in her social life.

Thank You..
 If anyone else has any other ideas, I am open to anything right now.

I have been saying, I think she has O.D.D. for the longest time. I read a book on it. She shows many signs of O.D.D.

ADHD is a very good possibility, she is a very hyper child. (Very intelligent also)

Unfortunately Bio-mom does not believe in psychologist and it was like pulling teeth before we could get SC in to see a family counselor.

I mentioned SC seeing a psychologist recently, but Bio-mom refuses.

My husband is the non custodial parent and can not make the appointment to take SC in to see a psychologist.
 Even if we did go behind Bio-mom's back and do so. Any treatments &/or medication will be refused by Biomom.

Until steps are taking in the right direction by Bio-Mom
What can we do in our home to protect our youngest?
It's exhausting and I'm concerned about my youngest, I may not have the power or control to help SC, but I certainly can protect my youngest from further aggression by their older sibling.

I would hate to cut back on visitation with SC, What other options do we have???