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Hello, I would really like to hear from fathers in Idaho, particularly ada county, who have had their child custody case go to court. Does anyone have a story to tell?

I'm looking for information such as:
Was there a bias toward the mother in granting custody awards?

Were there particular strategies for getting joint custody that were most effective - particularly with children under three?

Please tell me your story!!  Your help is greatly appreciated.

Thanks!

Idaho: I am father of 3 year old son.  Joint Legal and Joint physical custody. Current visititation arrangement is that child is with mother majority of the time. Visitation for me increases incrementally each year adding more time until age 7 when child will be 50/50 physical custody. The issue is related to mother's smoking habit.

Mother had quit smoking during pregnancy and as far as I knew she had quit permanently. I was shocked to hear son describing how mommie smokes inside and that he knew what a cigarette was. During a recent drop off I went inside and sure enough the place reeks of smoke. I have little desire to "rock the boat" as after three years we are finally able to communicate via email about our child. But I am concerned about the potential health affects. So far I am not aware of any particular health affect the smoking has had on the child.

I am going to bring up the issue with her, simply asking her to not smoke around the child, but based on past experience, I will most likely get nowhere and it will probably lead us back to a renewed cold war.

Questions:
1. Do I have any legal recourse to compel her to not smoke in child's presense?

2. Is this considered a serious or minor issue to courts?

Thanks for your help

Hi Soc, I had previously posted some of these questions on Friday May 5th but you never responded so I'm reposting here and adding additional questions. Please let me know if I'm posting incorrectly. Thanks!

First, here is the exact text of our Idaho court order for our vacation section. Child is two years, 2 months.

"We agree that each parent shall have up to fourteen (14) days vacation within each calendar year, so long as thirty days written notice (of those dates) is given the other parent, provided that until child turns 5, for vacation periods of less than four (4) overnights, fourteen day advance notice is sufficient. Subject to this, when less than thirty days written notice is given, and vacation plans interfere with the other parent's schedule we agree we cannot exercise our vacation days with child unless we have the other parents consent.

Until child is two, we agree vacation shall not result in child being away from either parent for more than two consecutive overnights. Until child is three we agree vacation shall not result in child being away from either parent for more than three consecutive overnights. Until child is age four, we agree vacation shall not result in being away from either parent for more than four consecutive overnights. Until child is five, we agree vacation shall not result in child being away from either parent more than 5 consecutive overnights. Between ages five and seven, we agree vacation shall not result in child being away from either parent more than seven consecutive overnights. After age seven if a vacation results in the child being with one parent for two consecutive weeks the other parent will have the next two consecutive weeks prior to returning to the alternating schedule thereafter. These restrictions on time away from a parent are not applicable to the normal custody schedule."

Here is the situation:
I made a vacation request in writing with 16 days advance notice to take ONE vacation day to be tacked on to my normaly residential friday overnight. My residential schedule for this particular weekend is from friday night at 5pm to Saturday at 7pm. My added vacation day would be an additional 24 hours so that the required drop off is 7pm on Sunday. I have told BM that I would bring child back at Sunday at 5pm,  two hours early.

Mother has denied the one day vacation request due to the following:
She wants child back at noon on Sunday, not 5pm which I maintain is supported by our agreement. She  then said that if 30 days written notice is not given and it interferes with her time, then she has to consent to the vacation day (please see the portion in our agreement that addresses the notice). She is therefore "not consenting" since I didn't provide 30 days notice.

I feel that our agreement is quite clear that when child is under 5 and vacation days are less than 4 days, 14 day advance notice is all that is required from me and that I don't need her "consent" to a 5pm drop off.

My questions are:

1. Please clarify the written notice part - can she deny my vacation request based on the facts I've provided? For this vacation request, 14 days notice is all that is required right?
2. Does the agreement support my assertion that a "vacation day" equals 24 hours of time?
3. If I tell mother that I will not abide by her request to bring child back at noon and bring him back at 5pm instead what recourse does she have and what is the risk to me in doing so?

Please tell me what you'd recommend doing in this case. My real need is to not have to deal with this constant bickering about what our agreement says!

Thank you

Hi Soc, I have a simple question that will require a lot of background.

Child is 2 years and 2 months old. Idaho. Subject is "vacation days" and the restrictions to them outlined in our agreement. Here is exact text of our agreement concerning vacation days (2nd paragraph, last sentence is the important one that has us in disagreement).

"We agree that each parent shall have up to fourteen (14) days vacation within each calendar year, so long as thirty days written notice (of those dates) is given the other parent, provided that until child turns 5, for vacation periods of less than four (4) overnights, fourteen day advance notice is sufficient. Subject to this, when less than thirty days written notice is given, and vacation plans interfere with the other parent's schedule we agree we cannot exercise our vacation days with child unless we have the other parents consent.

Until child is two, we agree vacation shall not result in child being away from either parent for more than two consecutive overnights. Until child is three we agree vacation shall not result in child being away from either parent for more than three consecutive overnights. Until child is age four, we agree vacation shall not result in being away from either parent for more than four consecutive overnights. Until child is five, we agree vacation shall not result in child being away from either parent more than 5 consecutive overnights. Between ages five and seven, we agree vacation shall not result in child being away from either parent more than seven consecutive overnights. After age seven if a vacation results in the child being with one parent for two consecutive weeks the other parent will have the next two consecutive weeks prior to returning to the alternating schedule thereafter. These restrictions on time away from a parent are not applicable to the normal custody schedule."

The situation is that right now, I only see the child two times a week (per our normal residential schedule) and of the two times a week one is always on tuesday for two hours and the other visit is an overnight either on thursday or friday night, alternating.   If mother takes a vacation day (away from my normal time), it automatically creates a situation in which I'm away from my child for an entire week, since I only see him twice a week. She says that the last sentence in the 2nd paragraph above allows her to do this. She says the total vacation doesn't count the normal residential schedule days she already has.   I had originally talked to my attorney about this sentence and he said it didn't mean that otherwise I would never have agreed to it. So now she is asking to take away one of my friday overnights via a vacation day which would result in me not seeing my child for a week.

My question is this: given the language in the agreement, can either of us combine requested vacation days with normal residential schedule days to have a combined total number of days which exceeds the restrictions set forth?  There is nothing in our agreement that addresses this in other sections.

Thanks for you help.

Hello Soc, hoping you can provide your interpretation of the transportation clause in our court agreement. Here is the section worded exactly.
******
"When child is scheduled to return to mother, mother shall arrange the transportation. When child is scheduled to return to father, father shall arrange the transportation. Until child is age 3, Father will supply transportation to mothers home when exchanges occur between the parents (i.e. non-daycare pickup or return). After age 3, exchanges, the parties will alternate providing transportation for exchanges between the parents (i.e., non-daycare pickup or return), with the receiving party picking up the child."
*****
Dad is providing all transportation for all exchanges that occur between father and mother until child is three (at mother's insistence) - there is no question about that in the agreement.
 
When child turns three we want to make sure we understand the change.  Agreement says that transportation after age 3 will alternate, with receiving parent being the one responsibile for pickup. Here is the situation: When the child turns 3 years old, there is NO situation in which the father is the receiving parent on exchanges. This is because when the father is picking up the child, he always picks him up from daycare rather than from Mother. When there is an exchange between the mother and father directly, mother is ALWAYS the receiving parent.  
 
Here are the questions:
 
1. Based on above, does this mean that mother is providing all transportation when exchanges occur between parents starting when child is 3 as she is always the receiving parent?
 
2. Does the word "alternate" in the last sentence cloud things at all or is it still very clear even with this word in there?  (while I don't know this for sure, its my guess that when Mother signed it, she didn't realize that the father was never going to be the receiving parent so she probably assumed tranportation between the two of them would equally be rotated back and forth).

Thanks and happy holidays!




 

 

Dear Soc,

Father and mother of 20 month old have court date in just a few days. Motion is to modify visitation. (father has little time with son now due to earlier "infant" agreement).  We've spent the last 8 months coming up with a residential schedule agreement in mediation and we are almost there with the exception of a few points. Mother wants Father to handle all transportation when there are exchanges until child is 3. Father proposes an equal transportation burden. (they live about 20 minutes apart in the same town).   The 2nd point of disagreement concerns holidays and vacations. Holiday schedule is fairly standard with many of them rotating between parents each year. Vacation is that each parent has two weeks a year of vacation. However, mother proposes that father be restricted from taking the holiday or vacation days to certain consecutive amounts. For example, father can have son for no more than 2 overnights for vacation or holiday prior to age two, from age 2-3 father can have child for no more than 3 consecutive overnights, and so on and adding an overnight each year. Mother proposes that these restrictions do not apply to her. So essentially this means mom can take a week vacation two times this year and father can take a 3 day vacation only.  Mom gets to spend all of thanksgiving weekend on her year with child, Father only gets 3 overnights - and so on.

She's said, "take it or leave it". We'd like to leave it so here are my questions.

1. If we go to court with 90% of a written agreement in hand, will the judge just decide on these two remaining issues or is the whole agreement in question since we are at court and either side can propose something entirely different?

(We do not want to risk losing the rest of the agreement that we've spent so long getting to so please advise as to whether we should just cave in)

2. Both attorneys have assumed that a settlement was happening for the last month so neither is really prepared for court in my opinion. If the agreement doesn't get signed and we end up in court that day, do the attorney's just wing it? Please tell me what you think we can expect.

Thanks for your help.

Hello Soc:

Idaho. Father scheduled to go to trial in Dec for a changing residential schedule to get more time with child (18 months). Mother and father were never married, nor lived together. Right now the only thing we are fighting about is time with child as father has very little.

Recently her attorney sent a letter through mine asking very detailed questions about a number of items, some of which are directly related to the motion in question, some of them are not:
Here are some examples of what was asked:

*My monthly checking account balances back 3 years before child was born, mortgage payments info, value of my home, real estate investments, stock investments, 401k balances, bonuses I've received, salary for the past 5 years, all my assets, all my bank statements, all my real estate transactions, if I'm a beneficiary of trusts and the list goes on and on.  

*Copies or records of all communication between myself and mother for 3 years before child was born until now

*Citations, speeding tickets, medical history, drugs taken, judgements against me

*Witnesses I plan to bring to trial including their contact information


Here are my questions:

Do I have to answer all the questions, particularly those that are not relevant to the motion such as the financial ones?

What could happen to me if I don't answer them and what will be a likely response by them if I don't?

Should my attorney have asked them for this same information (he only asked them to supply witness info and other motion-relevant info).

Given that the motion is about modifying the residential schedule, what do you think they are up to (is this some kind of scare tactic)?

Depending on your answers above I may have a private question for you that I do not want to post on this message board. Is that possible?

Thank you

Hello Soc, Looking for your advice to the latest progression of our case. I feel like this is a low point and there's little hope.
Idaho: father trying to get more time with 17 month old son (I am fathers girlfriend)  Current orders state tues/thurs/Sun visits for a total of 8 hours per week. Overnights may start between 12-18 months and father is to receive an "increasing amount of time with child".  Father has always wanted 50/50 custody after the "infant period" in which this agreement was signed.   Her lawyer convinced her to start doing the following additional time - every other weekend father gets child saturday from 10-5 and Sunday from 10-5 no overnights. This started two weeks ago (nothing in writing however).

Mediation failed. In mediation, mother agreed that she might start one overnight every other weekend on the last weekend of August. She said she would not agree to anything further.  In deposition this morning Mother again confirmed that short of a court order, she will not under any circumstances agree to any more time than what she has currently offered. She hasn't agreed to starting any overnights still but has said she will consider it at end of August.

Judge held a status conference about the case yesterday. He basically said the following:
To Mother: start overnights immediately as its in your agreement to do so
To Father: I will not grant 50/50 custody to two parents who do not agree to it
BOTH: go back to mediation and work this out. Court date Nov.

This has broken our hearts as we can't imagine the next 17 years and not having a 50/50 agreement at some point. So now, it seems like the best we can hope for is the  every other weekend and one overnight a week schedule reserved for fathers. And we have no chance at this even until court.

The mother has made it clear many times and in deposition today that she will not agree to anything more than one overnight every two weeks and even that was tentative. Mother has never had any reason for not granting time other than that she says child cannot adjust to two homes which is just not true.

Mother said during deposition that she would agree to a child psychologist seeing the child. We believe that a child psychologist will be in our favor but if the judge has already decided that 50/50 is out of the question maybe its worthless to even go this route. A child psychologist is certainly not going to change the mother's mind no matter what he/she says.

Questions:
1. Do you have any advice for what we should do between now and court date?

2. When we end up in court should we just take the 50/50 request off the table and not even ask for it since he already said this? In other words, do we have anything to lose by asking anyway?

3. What do we do to show we are trying to work something out with her but we are dealing with a completely closed door?

4. Should we go back to mediation as the judge suggested, knowing that we aren't going to get anywhere?

5. Should we try a child psychologist and hope he recommends child spends much more time with father? Should we not even bother?

Thanks this has been a sad couple of days and I feel hopeless.

Hello,

Case is in Idaho. Father requesting more visitation with 16 month old. Father's attorney petitioned court to change visitation and their first status conference with judge is in 10 days. Mediation has failed as of this week. Father currently has 8 hours a week visitation on three separate days.

Current parenting agreement which was signed at 4 months old states "overnights may start at 12-18 months" and father is to get an increasing amount of time. Father wants 50/50 custody and always has. Mother is not willing to sign any agreement for overnights. to start.  Mother's main argument uncovered in mediation involves three areas:
 
1. She says child cannot adjust to two homes as he is too sensitive and it will undermine his stability.
2. She says that the father cannot possibly be as good a parent as she is because he is a man and therefore does not have the correct instincts to properly anticipate and meet the childs needs
3. She says that father has missed time and therefore is not consistent in exercising his current visitation and therefore should not get any more visitation

Numbers one and two are flat out false from our perspective and she has no evidence supporting either assertion.

Regarding #3 -- The father has not missed any visitation since March 1 of this year but in the 9 months prior to that he took two week long vacations and had 3 to 4 work trips that caused him to miss scheduled time. THere were also a number of visits that the mother requested he not take due to the child's or his own illness which he agreed to -- she is counting this in her missed time count.  In all cases of missed time he asked for makeup time which of course the mother refused to grant.

We just found out today that mother's attorney wants to deposition the father this week. This was unexpected and we are a little worried about going into it with little prep work (we do have an attorney and he doesn't seem worried about it). On the other hand we feel like all that has to be told is the truth and there is nothing in the truth that can hurt the father.

Here are my questions:

1.  Do you have any advice regarding dos and don'ts for the father with respect to the deposition?

2. Given the above arguments of the mother, what things would you speculate they will  try to trip him up or get something out of him that supports their arguments?

3. If you were their attorney, what would your deposition strategy be?

4. Is it normal to go into a deposition with this little prep time (as I said, his attorney is not too worried about it but they have scheduled some time to prepare).

Thanks for your help as always.

Idaho

We just got some new news I wanted to run by you. Father trying to get more time with 16 month old son. Parenting plan was vague and called for overnights to begin 12-18 months and increasing amounts of time with father - none of which has happened.  Prior to now, mother has given no reason for not giving more time.

They went to their first mediation session since the parenting plan was put in place a year ago. In mediation, mother basically said the child was a "mess" every time after he had time with his father. She said he won't eat, cries, won't sleep through the night etc. She then went on to say how "sensitive" the child is and even said that it took him two months to adjust to his new day care (he switched about two months ago to a full fledged daycare with other children instead of an in home daycare). Her argument is that basically the child cannot possibly adjust to overnights and will never be ready for substantial time with the father until he is 8-10 years old.

After a year and a half and months of offering different step up schedules to the mother, this is the very first time we've heard any of this. I spend a substantial amount of time with the child when he is with the father and I have never seen such a well adjusted kid. In the last year, I've seen him cry maybe 5-7 times and never for more than a minute or two. He never exhibits any anxiety and rarely exhibits fussiness. I've seen him refuse food one time with his father and it happened last week. We've checked with his new daycare and they say he's adjusted great, no behavioral problems, he plays with the other kids, naps when he's supposed to etc.

Based on all this, I believe either the mother is lying or SHE is the one who is sensitive rather than the child. We already know the mother is extremely emotional and paranoid about the child. Past daycares have complained that she calls several times a day and is overly critical of care to the point they are offended. This combined with all the uncooperative and hostile treatment she has exhibited towards father leads me to believe this became her "argument" that she is going to take to court and its not really true.

Here are my questions:

1. In this situation, does she have the burden of proof that spending time with the father is detrimental to the childs emotional well-being as she claims? Or does he have to prove that its not detrimental?

2. This suddenly seems like a really tough argument to overcome because it seems hard to prove anything - do you have any suggestions?

3. We believe that an evaluator will be favorable and will ask that the court order one - Is it reasonable to expect the evaluator to spend a substantial amount of time observing the child after he returns from a visit with the father, to the point of staying overnight to see how the child is?

Thanks for your help and advice.

Hello, I've posted here before about a case that you may recall. (my boyfriend is unwed father, trying to get more time with 16 month old. Mother refuses any overnights or additional time for no reason whatsever.) We do have a hearing in a few weeks supposedly but now just found out that her attorney lied and didn't accept the service like she said she did so we just had to file some "hurry up" motion. That's a side point.

Our attorney is going to deposition the mother soon. I've read the document on this site "notes on depositions" but still have questions. I want second opinions on everything because the father got totally screwed with his previous attorney and I just want to make sure that we are controlling the situation and telling our attorney what we want him to do.

The article I read makes a big deal about recording the deposition and getting a transcript of it but the article doesn't really explain why. So my questions are:

1. Why record and get a transcript of the deposition?

2. The article also says to come up with a list of questions for your attorney. I'm not sure where to start and what is relevant to ask - any insight on what to focus on?  (the mother is a good parent in terms of basic care for the child. She fails dismally in other areas that you previously said were probably not relevant to getting more time).

3. Is it absolutely necessary that the father be in the room when his attorney is depositioning the mother? (he will pay for this dearly from her. But of course he will do anything for his son too)

Thanks for your help!

We have a hearing in a few weeks on a motion to change visitation. We are pretty confident that a change in visitation will be granted as the child was an infant when original agreement was signed and the parenting agreement indicates the intent to start overnights at 12-18 months and increase the amount of time with the father over time (none of which has happened and child is now 16 months.) Father is a great father and is spotless. There is no reason to deny him more time and he's gone to extraordinary lengths to be involved with his son over the last 16 months.     We are trying to figure out if the mother's deliberate attempts to keep the father out of child's life are relevant to the argument.

Here are examples of how she is behaving:

-refusing to communicate except by email and in many cases she doesn't respond to email
-during all dropoffs she has friends over and won't let him talk to her; she refuses to say a word to him when she picks up
-We have asked for a list of the childs activities during her custodial time so father can attend and she doesn't respond (this is explicity stated in parenting agreement that father has a right to do this)
-She refers father to her attorney whenever he asks for more time per their parenting agreement.
- Her attorney also doesn't respond to our attorneys attempts to contact.  The only thing that her attorney has responded to was the motion to change the schedule as required. Her response was the same schedule we already have with one additional hour. They have supplied no reason for why they will not give more time
-Mother doesn't inform father about important things like emergency room visits
-mother resists all attempts for the father to be involved (won't let him take the child to the doctor for checkups, refused to allow him to make any decisions about daycare etc).
-mother refuses to let the father occasionally take time out of work and take the kid out of daycare for a few hours even though she would be at work at that time

Most of this behavior we can prove either through email or recording her conversations. Father just wants more time and is not trying to take the kid away from the mother in any way.

Questions:

1. Is any of her behavior relevant to the question of whether the father should have substantially more time?  Is it relevant to anything?

2. Given that there is no possible argument for not giving the father more time (the kid is in daycare 40 hours a week!), what should our attorney be prepared to argue in the hearing? We can't imagine what they will say...

3. Money is not an issue for us and it is an issue for her - what should be the strategy in the hearing regarding what to ask for as evidence for trial (evaluator? home study?). AGAIN, this dad is spotless and has done all the right things.

4. Do you have any other advice for what we should do to have a successful argument? We have the resources to do anything that is necessary.

Thank you

Facts: (i've written to you several times so you might recall this)
Idaho. 13 month old child. Mother has primary physical custody. Father has child 3 times a week for a couple of hours each time. No overnights. I'm Father's girlfriend.

After reading everything on the Sparc website, we now realize that we made many mistakes in signing the original custody agreement. The mother refused to sign anything that Father wanted when child was born so we stupidly conceded to her wishes and we put specific language in the agreement that we thought would require her to gradually change the amount of time with the father.

For example, the agreement says "overnights may start between 12-18 months".  Mother agreed to the intent of this statement verbally but now her laywer says the use of the word "May" means there is no agreement for anything. She is completely going back on it and says there will not be any overnights. Period. She has also not agreed to any increased amount of time beyond what was originally agreed to 8 months ago.

Agreement says that  "because of xxx's age we agree that he has a home base with mother and he shall be with father in gradual increased amounts of time ..."  (agreement goes on to specify the actual schedule to begin with)

Agreement also states:
Future Modifications: we agree that a disagreement between concerning the residential schedule arrangements constitutes a substantial and material change in circumstance sufficient to justify a modification of the residential schedule.

Questions:  
1. Is the last clause sufficent to get the court to review the schedule  as obviously the father does not agree to the current schedule based on the fact that overnights will not start  as planned and there has been no increase in time?  

2. Given that she has not agreed to any increased amount of time whatsover, is she violating the agreement or was it too vague to hold water?

3. How do we inform the Mother that we intend to petition the court to change the schedule unless she agrees to begin a regular schedule of increasing overnights? (in the past you have advised us never to threaten her about court)

Facts:All parties are residents of Idaho who live in the same town. I am the girlfriend of the father. Father and mother were never married. Child is a 13 month old boy. Father currently has son on three days a week  for two hours each on Tues and Thurs and 3 hours on Sunday.

Father wanted much more time than this but this is all he could get out of mediation and he was trying to spare his son a court battle. This current schedule has been agreed to by both parties and is filed with the court. Agreement says that overnights begin between 12-18 months. There isn't any agreement about schedule beyond that as mother refused to discuss anything past 18 months.

Mother is now saying that her lawyer tells her that the agreement is not binding because of the vague language regarding overnights and that she won't start overnights until he is at least two years old.   We want 50-50 custody someday and mother is telling us that's never going to happen. We are tentatively planning to file a motion with the court to clarify the agreement about overnights. We need help with strategy as we are at our wits end.

We are tired of playing "nice" with this woman and I am pushing my boyfriend to fight for his son.   He is worried that anything he does before 2 years of age will not go in his favor because of a general bias towards mothers. Both parents are fit parents and have adequate financial resources to take care of the son.

Questions:
1. Is there any possible way that the court can deny overnights between now and 18 months if that was the intent of their signed agreement?

2. In the absense of any agreement as to how many overnights and when, who gets to decide that? Can the father put in a request for a schedule of overnights when he files the motion for clarity on the agreement?

3. The father wants 50/50 custody so at what age should he file with the court to get this? Should he ask for something less first? Should he wait until he is two years old to ask for more time than occasional overnights?

4. Is there an age that is considered the "right" age to begin spending overnights away from the primary caretaker?

5.If the father does nothing now but give in to mother's dictated visitation schedule until he is two or three will that hurt him later because he didn't try hard enough early on?

6. Knowing that our objectives are to get to 50/50 custody, can you please outline the best strategy you think we should take over the next two years?  

Thank you, we really believe this kid deserves to have a father in his life and its unconscionable to me that a mother would behave as this woman is. Your insight is greatly appeciated.

Facts of the case:
I am the Father's girlfriend and I'm helping him do research. Mother and Father of the child, both residents of Idaho, were never married and pregnancy was unplanned. Child (boy) is now 12 months.  Current agreement filed in the court states that the father has the child on Tues, Thurs, & Sun for 2 hours each with overnights to start between 12-18 months. There is no agreement beyond 18 months at this time.

Father has requested overnights begin. Mother says no and that she will not consider this until 18th month despite the original intent of the agreement to start at some time between 12-18 months.

If the father had his way, the child would be in his physical custody right now 50% of the time. The mother has been uncooperative from the beginning and the father had to go through lawyers and a mediator to get the 6 hours a week he has today.

Mother claims that there is no reason for the child to be with his father for any extended period of time on a regular basis until at least 3 years of age although she has not offered any explanation as to why she thinks this.  Its also unlikely the mother will ever voluntarily agree to 50/50 custody at any age.

Both father and mother are fit parents with good jobs and are equally capable of any level of parenting, full or part time.

Questions:
1. Is there research that supports its in the best interest of the child to be with the father for extended overnight periods? What are the factors?

2. In a "both parents equal" scenario, is a judge likely to be biased towards the mother in granting physical custody if parents cannot agree? If so, are there any factors that can reduce that bias?

3. Is it better to go to court and ask for 50/50 custody right from the start or is it more wise to ask for less up front and then ask for more as time goes on and the child matures?

4.  If Father ultimately wants 50/50 physical custody what strategies should the father employ now in order to get it?

5. If father must be out of town during his regularly scheduled time, is it permissable for him to arrange to leave child in the care of the child's paternal grandmother who wants to see the child or does the father forfeit this time to the Mother instead (as the mother claims).

Thank you for your help.

 

Does anyone on this forum know anything about Russell Comstock, a judge in Ada County? Our story is like most stories on this site-- Bitter and unreasonable mother who is trying to keep a great father from seeing his son (16 months).

Our first hearing with Judge Comstock is in a few weeks for change in visitation.  Mother has only let the father have the son for 8 hours a week and no overnights ever. Father is spotless and tries at every opportunity to be more involved  - there is absolutely no argument for not giving more time other than she doesn't want to give it. They live in the same town.

Looking for any info on what kinds of evidence the judge is partial to and what to expect from this judge.

Thanks for any info you can provide

Hello, my boyfriend and I are currently preparing for a custody battle. Boyfriend is the father. Child is 13 months old and the mother is doing everything she can to limit visitation to as minimal as possible. We think that joint custody is in the best interest of the child. Both parents are fit parents - its simply an issue of the mother not wanting to give any time to the father. Father currently gets child for 8 hours a week - no overnights.

I'd love to hear from fathers in similar custody/visitation cases. What strategies have worked to get you 50/50 custody?

Any lawyers in the Boise area that you'd recommend? Why?

Any insight regarding Boise family law judges and if they will be biased towards the mother all else being equal?

Would love to hear any advice from people in Ada County.

Thanks!