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BF is paying above guidelines right now by about $120 a month.  CS can be reviewed every 3 years or 15% income change.  BF is expecting a raise next year that will amount to over $800 more a month than when CS was set, significantly higher than the 15% income change.  If BM has it recalculated & it's found that the amount that he's currently paying is within guidelines with the new income, will the court deviate from that & order him to pay more since he'll be making so much more & he was able to pay above guidelines when making less?  

Just a hypothetical question so please don't turn it into more.  ;)

Case in North Carolina.

I have been trying for 18 months to get a divorce from my wife.  12 month seperation requirement has been met.  File for absolute divorce, wife got automatic additional 30 day extension to answer.

Came forward after that 30 days with motion to delay divorce because it will be a financial hardship for her to be divorced.

NC General Statute says defendant can not prevent divorce after the requirements are met.

Judge signed off on order stating case will resume upon me returning to the state.  I will not be returning as I am in the military & will not be stationed there.  I can not go now to NC because of current military training.

There is no spousal support, only child support in effect.  Wife wants quit claim deed to the house.  I refuse as there is $60,000 in equity.  She has held a lucaritive job for over a year & I pay $1200 a month in CS.

There is a seperate property case, unrealted to the absolute divorce case.

Order also states that the 2 cases be combined & heard when I return to NC.

My lawyer is just letting this all slide.  I just want a divorce!

1.  Can the judge sign off on this?

2.  Is this a legitimate reason for a divorce to be held up?

3.  How can I resolve this?

4.  Is it possible to take it to a higher court?

Thank you!

Hi Soc!


The defendent was never served with the complaint to have a chance to present a defense & there were things that were not true in the complaint, yet the judge signed off on it.

There was also an affidavit that was notorized but not stamped by the clerk, so unsure if that was even seen by the judge as it contradicted what was in the complaint.

The complaint & the order have the same date & time stamp by the clerk.

1. Can an attorney take a complaint to the judge along with the order typed out by said attorney, have him sign the order right then & then file both with the clerk?  

2. What actions can be taken against the attorney and/or judge?

Thank you so much for your time!

I have sole physical & legal custody.  NCP pays $1200 a month in CP.  We live 700 miles apart.

1.  If children visit NCP for 4 weeks in the summer, does he have the right to withhold CP for that time?

2.  In the event of an emergency & he is unreachable, does his fiance have decison making authority or will they have to call me?  Does he even have decison making authority?

TIA!

Final Decree entered in NC
NCP resides in NC
CP resides in AL

Seperation agreement drawn up by attorney & incorporated as final divorce decree.  

I am the "wife".  I moved with kids from NC to AL in Sept.

Custody

"The wife shall retain custody and control over the minor children.  The parent retaining custody shall be referred to herein as the Custodial Parent.  The parent referred to as the Non-Custodial Parent.  The Custodial Parent agrees to consult with the Non-Custodial Parent on such matters as major medical treatments and the selection of schools for the children to promote the best interests of the children.  The Custodial Parent shall exercise final determination of these matters."


Visitation

"The Non-Custodial Parent shall have the right to visit the children contingent upon him being current on the hereinafter required child support payments at all reasonable times and places.  Proper advance arrangements shall be made by the Non-Custodial parent with the respect to the exercise of these visitation rights"

Ex-H has history of anger issues.  DSS also investigated him for neglect since older daughter began self mutilating while visiting him.  She was in counseling at the time & is still in couseling with major anxiety issues revolving around BD.  Civilian DSS recommended anger management & parenting classes, however he's military & they protect their own, so they said the allegations were unfounded.


1.  Do I have full sole & legal custody?

2.  If I (along with counselor) feel that the visits are going to be detrimental to older daughter's well being, can I prevent visitation?  

3.  Can I also keep younger daughter (4) from going if older daughter (9) isn't going?

Thanks!

Posted before about mom being in Ohio over Father's Day.  Not an issue anymore, however now her parents are going to NC to spend 2 weeks in mid-July.  There's not a chance at six consecutive weeks that DH can have the kids without it interferring with her parents visit.

The order states:

"In the event that the distance between the parties' respective homes is so great tht the husband is unable to exercise weekend visitation with the minor children then, in lieu of such weekend visitation, husband's summer visitation with the minor children shall be increased to six (6) weeks."

How should that be interpreted?  Should we go with it being consecutive or what ever BM feels it means?  

She wants to break it up into either two, three week visits or three, two week visits.  DH simply can't do it with his military obligations, not to mention the financial aspect.  We're talking $500-$600 each round trip with gas & hotels.  It was $500 at Christmas & that was when gas was cheaper.  Kids are too young to fly alone, so that's not an option.  

DH thinks that because of the wording, there's no way that she would be denying the full 6 weeks, so contempt would be out of the question.  I think that he's going to have to take it back to court to have dates clarified (ie. visitation begins the day that school recesses for the summer for 6 consecutive weeks).

So, what are your opinions on how this should be interpreted?

TIA!

DH is to get his kids for Father's Day & 6 weeks this summer.  He gets 6 weeks because he can not exercise EOW because we live in AL, kids are in NC, if he could do EOW, he would get them for 2 weeks in the summer.

We decided that we would go pick them up on Father's Day & start the 6 weeks then.  That way there my kids could see their dad (who also lives in NC for Father's Day).

Problem is BM has decided that she wants to take a 2 week trip to OH right after school lets out, which will then lead to kids being in OH on Father's Day.

We know that she's going to say that he can have them on Father's Day...in OH & then he can have them a week later for 6 weeks when she gets back.  Then she's not "denying" the visit, just making it impossible.  The CO states that he is to pick them up & drop them off at her residence, so wouldn't that mean that she has to have them there in NC on Father's Day for him to exercise his visitation?  If she doesn't have them in NC & she does in fact do what we are sure she's going to (granting the visit in OH), what can he do?

Thanks!

Long story, but I'll try to sum it up as short as possible.

BM had a CO done back in March granting her temporary custody.  She had her lawyer go in & say that BD (my fiance) was a kidnapping risk because he picked OS up from school without her knowledge.  It didn't happen that way.  He called her an hour before school let out & her friend that no normally picks up OS was there on the phone with BM & she told DF that she knew that he was picking up OS.  Not to mention DF is in the military (career), so kidnapping isn't something that he would do, imagine the reprocussions.  Also, in the CO it was stated that the kids can't stay overnight as long as he's cohabiting with a member of the opposite sex, even though BM was allowing it.  Anyway, the CO was March 23.  He was getting EOW with the boys.  March 24th comes, it's DF's weekend, BM still sends them, we all went camping for the weekend.  All the kids have a great time, BM gets mad, cuts of visitation.  They go to mediation, BM allows DF to have kids EOW from 9am-2pm on Sat & Sun, which they are allowed to come over to our home.  It's now July, the boys were allowed to go to the fireworks with DF, me & my 2 girls.  We had to drop them off to her after we tracked her down at a friend's house where everyone was drunk/stoned.  Nice, huh?  These are all parents in their 30's!  We had no choice because of the CO & the Sherriff would do nothing to help DF.  Well, then BM's car got repossessed, we saw when it happened as the private investigator contacted DF to find out if he knew where the car was.  So, DF is talking to her as the man is loading up the car & she suddenly says that the boys can start coming for overnights again as long as they don't sleep in our room.  Fine, not a problem.  They came EOW up until Sept when DF was relocated about 700 miles away.  Fast foward to 3 weeks ago.  DF calls BM tells her that he's going to pick up the boys for Christmas at 2:00 Christmas day as she has stated in the order.  BM says no, that she has plans for Christmas.  He says fine, I'll pick them up on the 26th & bring them back on the 2nd.  She says "ok".  Then she called a couple of days later complaining that OS has to go back to school on the 3rd & that he needs rest so he has to come home on the 1st.  DF said he can rest in the car, it was never a problem before when they would travel to see her family.  Well, their property hasn't been settled yet & low & behold he gets a call from his attorney yesterday saying that BM wants a quit-claim deed signed.  DF refuses.  BM also wants the visitation agreement drawn up allowing for 5 weeks in the summer, which she's requiring that he take leave (and he can't since he's in training) because she doesn't want them left with me until we're married.  DF says the boys have no problems with me & that there's no reason that I can't watch them because I'm home all day anyway.  She says that she knows that, but she has a problem with me therefore, I can't watch them.  She also said that she doesn't have to let them even come here as the order states that he can't cohabit with a member of the opposite sex.  But, before we moved she knew we lived together & still allowed them to stay overnight, when she agreed to Christmas, she knew we live together. She says the same rules apply to her & that she follows them.  We know that's not true because OS told us all about he BF staying over night & sleeping in mommy's bed with her not to mention that my best friend lives right around the corner from her & she sees the BF there all the time.  Anyway, DF isn't agreeing to the terms of her visitation either.  We had used to PP from here for the military & had just sent it to his attorney yesterday when this bomb shell got dropped.  BM is also PAing OS.  

DF is at the point where he wants to quit fighting.  The divorce has ruined him financially & it's going to get worse with the house & her lawyer fees.  He's done with her controlling his life.  He can't afford to keep fighting this, not to mention that he can't be in court because of military committments.  Yes, we know they have to let you go to court, but when you're in training, the rules are different & regardless, he falls under the Soldiers & Sailors Relief Act & that is supposed to automatically defer any court proceedings when in training or on a mission.  So, she's getting nasty, using the kids as pawns, all while denying it.  DF is emotionally spent & broke.  So when is it OK to just cry uncle?

~M
Dedicated Fiance to ~M, loving mother to 2 beautiful girls & future SM to 2 wonderful boys.