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Thank you Soc- it's hard to find that line in court where you are assertive enough to get heard yet are not in any way offending the judge by seeming pushy or disrespectful, next time I'll be more prepared, this time around I just kept waiting for my turn....

since we were only ordered to mediation, can my requests still be brought to the courts attention at the next hearing?

Ok- Soc- I filed the supplemental declaration, also included motion for temp order to bar dad from exposing child to the girlfriend and a request for a subpoena for the police report.

Basically at court all the judge did was decide to re-offer the case to the previous GAL, and that dad and I should try a mediation session, and that in about a month we will schedule a status conference and at that time if nothing is solved through mediation set an actual court date.

Procedurally- should my requests have been acknowledged or addressed in some manner at that court appearance?

How can I, without being disruptive- of course, voice my concerns in court- such as the issue above, when no one is talking about it or addressing it at all?

Thank you so much!

Hi again Soc!

All parties and order in WI.

Last month I filed a motion for modifcation/clarification regarding my son. The court date is next monday.

My son came to me this weekend and send his stepmother-dad's gf, not wife, had been in another fight with the neighbor. It sounds like they get into screaming matches frequently, however this time it escalated into a serious physical altercation in front of my son.

This woman has 6 felony convictions, 3 disorderly conduct conviction, 3 telephone harrassment convictions, during court the judge said she had every reason to behave properly around my son because she is on a 5 year stayed prison sentence with probation. However, one of her disorderly conduct convictions came after her probation started, as did the harrassment convictions and this altercation.

Questions:
1. Am I entitled the a copy of the police report regarding this newest altercation?

2. How do I go about including this incident in the motion that has already been filed?

3. Is this an appropriate issue for an exparte motion? It appears my son was right there when the women came to blows, and it got so heated that one of them- I haven't questioned my son so I only have the info he volunteered- got into their vehicle and ran into the other with it.

4. Can I get a restraining order barring this woman from being around my son?

5. Have also been trying serve dad the motion to the court, he is refusing to accept anything that anyone tries tohand to him. If this refusal is recorded on video, am I covered for the event that he successfully dodges being served? In my state anyone over 18 can serve the documents, if dad is in his car, can my server place the paperwork under his wiper and that be considered sucessful service?

 

Clarification of the educational orders -- yes, but not contempt -- there's no facts to support a contempt. You may want to move for primary placement, but now that Dad has already started the ball, you may indeed be up against a de facto status quo, although he can't force you to contribute financially for the private schooling.


just for clarification on my own part- does anything constitute an actionable violation of "joint legal custody" without being specified in an order?

ok

I included the contempt because of the enrollment in school, without notification and multiple medical appointments without notification- I think I left out the medical in my first post. I am also requesting the contempt based on the fact that father tells the child the food I feed her is poison...realistically I am hoping to make the court aware of what is going on, get a clarified order, have the court order him to follow the order, set it up to where if he continues to behave this way the court will find him in contempt.

The new school situation has only been in effect for about 4-6 weeks, since the start of this school year...and since she is there only every other week- she has only attended that school for 3 weeks- if that makes a difference.

I filed the paperwork on Tuesday of this week- basically as soon as I had confirmation that she was in a different school....however the court date is not until November 14...will the status quo be based upon when this was filed or when it is heard?

Hello Socrateaser!

All parties and order in WI.

Child is 4.5 years old, court order 50/50 legal/physical- week on, week off schedule, no cp indicated.

Hopefully I will be able to accurately detail the logistics so the situation is clear. I live in town A, Dad lives 18 miles to the west of me in a rural area, the closest town to Dad is 16 miles to his north and 26 miles northwest of my town.


Child has been going to childcare in the town north of Dad during his weeks, and to a daycare in my town during my weeks. Actually my daycare is as close to dad as the one he uses- but he just refuses anything in regards to me.

During the spring of this year Dad and I talked about putting child into 4 year old kindergarten, he wanted her in his district because it's "richer" and I wanted her in my district because, with the bus routes we can still maitain our every other week rotation. If she went to school in his district I  would have to be late to work every day and leave work 2 hours early every day- just not feasible. So we agreed to not enroll her and discuss the school issue over the next year.

Last week daughter said something to me about her "new big kids school",  so I called her daycare up in dad's town under the ruse of updating my contact info where they told me he had taken her out of that school over 4 weeks ago.

I tried many times to speak with him about this and he kept dodging. Finally he said he had put her in a 4k program at a parochial- lutheran (neither of us are lutheran). He also said he did not need to discuss this with me.

I believe that his intention is to create a staus quo situation so that when school does roll around he can say- she has been attending "this" district for a year already- change would be detrimental at this point. Which if the judge agreed would necessitate changing the periods of placement and minimize my time with our daughter.

So I filed for remedial contempt, relief sought being the court demanding he follow the order, clarification of the order, and a designation that when she does attend school it will be in my school district to protect the current time allocation in place. I did not ask for any change in actual time, or legal or physical custody status.

Questions:

1. Was this the right approach in your opinion? Would it have been more effective to just go for primary placement right away?

2. With the current placement schedule having been in place for almost 2 years now, is it likely the court would want to preserve that status quo as I have requested?

3. What am a missing? Is there a big facet of this that I have overlooked or should pay closer attention to?

Thank you so much for all of your help.

Hello again Soc

All parties and order in WI

My ex has been with-holding information regarding our son from me, he also refuses to discuss anything regarding our son with me. I recently, on accident found out his email address. I emailed him stating that I though email would be a great tool for us to use to communicate about child, it would be calm, non emotional and able to be dealt with as our daily schedules allowed- rather than a phone call that basically stops everything.

He stated that he refuses to email with me, he also said on the phone that he will not discuss anything with me, he also has never answered any letter I have sent him.

I am growing more and more frustrated with being cut out of our son's life like this.

I posted before about my last attorney and my dissatisfaction with his services. I am reluctant, and at this point can't afford to use him any more anyway and was planning to represent myself in filing for a motion for modification this week.

As a last attempt to allow ex to do the right thing, I forwarded the email's to ex's attorney and asked him to find out the answers to my inquiries since his client refuses to communicate. He sent me back an email stating that I would have to contact him through my attorney and he would not talk to me until he had it in writing from both me AND my old attorney that I am no longer represented.

I emailed back saying that I no longer have an attorney, and will be handling all matters myself.

I don't understand why I basically need a "permission slip" for someone to give me some answers- answers that I am entitled to by law.

So questions:

1. Must I contact old attorney and have him contact ex's attorney?
2. Why is this necessary?
3. Why is my word not good enough?
4. Is this normal procedure or am I getting stonewalled?
 

Again- Thank you so much- you are a saint to use the knowledge you have worked hard and paid much for to help those who may not have had the same opportunity- THANK YOU

All parties and order in Wisconsin



I don't know if I said this in any of the earlier posts- but at the end of August I had supplied EX/CP with a calendar for the upcoming 12 month period (just as I had done last year). With this calendar I included a letter stating if he didn't agree with the schedule to please respond in writing by september 1, with alternate dates etc.otherwise the schedule would stand and be enforceable.

He never responded in writing- said his lawyer said he didn't have to, he just threw the calendar into my car saying it was wrong and everything would have to change. Because he was being so irrational and a conversation was not able to be had, I told him to get out of my car- he was leaning in the window and I left. Then he denied my weekend time with son.

Current Hubby and I went on vacation this weekend- been planned for 3 months based on the visitation schedule that had been in place. From our rented cabin 4.5 hours away I called son on Friday night at 6:30 like I call every night. Ex of course will never answers the phone when I call, I must always leave a message saying "have son call me" then about 15-20 minutes later he will have son call back (this is the routine every single time I call)- so son called back and said he was on his way to see me- I was flabbergasted. I had had no contact- no communication whatsoever from ex all week. So I told son to let me talk to dad.

Dad gets on the phone very angrily asking why I am not going to be at the swap(they are already over halfway there) I try to explain and once again he just blusters over me. So after 4 minutes of not being able to get anything said I just hang up.

I have all the stuff for my motion just about done- will be filing next monday- he will probably deny the upcoming weekend, which would be the second weekend in the normal rotation that is denied.

Questions:

1. Will me not having son this past weekend hurt my motion to the court?

2. I am filing for Modification for placement - with the understanding that that request has a slim chance of actually being granted- what is the exact wording I need to use for if the judge does not see grounds to change placement then he would at least clarify the order?

3. I have a proposed parenting plan, basically what I would like to see happened if placement is not changed- do I include this with my initial filing of the motion or do I wait for the judge to deny the mod and then file it with a motion for clarification?

4. By him not properly responding to the letter about the schedule- or even communicating what he thought the schedule should- how does that affect the situation? does it help me in court? hurt me in court?

Thanks You so much for your help