Summer vacation question

[MixedBag]

so I just deleted....

[wysiwyg]

oppps

[wysiwyg]

You never answered when the holidays fall that belong to Dad.

ANSWER:  sorry perhaps I got lost in it all!  (Like that never happens LOL)  this year it is Dad's b day and fathers day, both weekends Fri to Sun

If you want to eliminate confrontation, you give her no reason to get out of the car -- have son ready to head out the door when she arrives and video tape it all. Believe me, with 3 divorces, two of which are -- well, we have learned to manage confrontration.

ANSWER:  She refuses to allow the child to be UNESCORTED from the door to the car, insists on coming to the door, more threats of filings.  We live in a complex that does not have the parking lot visible from our apartment.  VIdeo tape?  I have security cams and 24 hour a day video recording going on!

So that's IN AN ORDER? Highly unusual for a judge to delegate that authority to a mediator.

ANSWER:  yes an order


You said: "So if Mediator says BM you WILL turn over the child to BF for his fathers day weekend and she does not, (and she did) then it is contempt that needs sto be filed.

ANSWER:  we have one filing now in that her attorney, our attorney and the GAL (an attorney) told her that Labor day weekend was BF's but yet she took off out of state instead for the three day weekend.  Obviously no one has even held her severly accountable for her actions past a slap on the wrist.  ONce we can get to court or mediatoe that issue then perhaps we can get somplace, but obvioussly no one is ever gonna make her do anything she does not want to.

for the three hours, your example is for during the school year, but your original post is about the summer so school is not in session.


ANSWER:  I believe I said that during the summer when one party has the child for more than 2 weeks then the parent not having the child gets to have the child for three hours during the week.  For this reason we have always scheduled 2 weeks on 2 weeks off, but BM is now saying she does not want us to have 3 segments in the summer only 2, by doing so this will then take us to have 18 or so days in a row (more than 2 weeks) thus BM insists on exercising her 3 hours in all THREE weeks.  

As far as camp is concerned, he is afraid to say anything to her about not going, but she goes with him for the last several years, being 15 he wants independance and is not getting it, would like to no go this year and is always scheduled over dad's b day weekend.  IMagine that!

[MixedBag]

>You never answered when the holidays fall that belong to
>Dad.
>
>ANSWER:  sorry perhaps I got lost in it all!  (Like that never
>happens LOL)  this year it is Dad's b day and fathers day,
>both weekends Fri to Sun

SO -- if you take the second half, Father's Day will be in addition to the summer time.   Can't advise about b-day, because don't know when that falls.


>
>If you want to eliminate confrontation, you give her no reason
>to get out of the car -- have son ready to head out the door
>when she arrives and video tape it all. Believe me, with 3
>divorces, two of which are -- well, we have learned to manage
>confrontration.
>
>ANSWER:  She refuses to allow the child to be UNESCORTED from
>the door to the car, insists on coming to the door, more
>threats of filings.  We live in a complex that does not have
>the parking lot visible from our apartment.  VIdeo tape?  I
>have security cams and 24 hour a day video recording going
>on!
>

Maybe a restraining order in another court would be a suggestion?

At 15, he could also wait in the alcove or something.  I bet HE doesn't want confrontation either.....

>You said: "So if Mediator says BM you WILL turn over the child
>to BF for his fathers day weekend and she does not, (and she
>did) then it is contempt that needs sto be filed.
>
>ANSWER:  we have one filing now in that her attorney, our
>attorney and the GAL (an attorney) told her that Labor day
>weekend was BF's but yet she took off out of state instead for
>the three day weekend.  Obviously no one has even held her
>severly accountable for her actions past a slap on the wrist.
>ONce we can get to court or mediatoe that issue then perhaps
>we can get somplace, but obvioussly no one is ever gonna make
>her do anything she does not want to.


Not until she recognizes and honors the order and for some that happens over time and many trips to the court.  If you win, I'd be asking for all costs to be awarded back to you.  We have 2 EXs who are slow learners.....

If she goofed up Labor Day weekend, a motion to show cause should have been filed on Tuesday after Labor Day.....


>
>for the three hours, your example is for during the school
>year, but your original post is about the summer so school is
>not in session.
>
>
>ANSWER:  I believe I said that during the summer when one
>party has the child for more than 2 weeks then the parent not
>having the child gets to have the child for three hours during
>the week.  For this reason we have always scheduled 2 weeks on
>2 weeks off, but BM is now saying she does not want us to have
>3 segments in the summer only 2, by doing so this will then
>take us to have 18 or so days in a row (more than 2 weeks)
>thus BM insists on exercising her 3 hours in all THREE weeks.
>
>

I'd settle for nothing less than all of dad's time, no matter how it's split up.  One philosophy could be to let her take the first half, and then per the order she "must" let dad have the second half, because there's no other time available that fits the definition of "half the summer".