Ugh! They're already fighting!

[tulip]

The judge hasn't even signed the order yet, and already they (dh and bm) are proving they cannot get along. She's a wacko. She picked the kids up from school on Friday. It's dh's weekend, but since ss was "missing his mom" so much on Wed, we decided thought they could go over their Fri for the night. We were going out anyway, so they would've been w/a sitter here.

Well, dh called to talk to the kids between 4:30 and 5:00, just to say hi and see how their day went. She freaked out! She goes " I can't believe you're doing this already! They have not even been home an hour, you are going to see them in less than 24 hours!" She wouldn't let him talk to his kids. They did call him back, though, when they found out he had called. They were each going to spend the night at a friend's house. (Missed Mom eh?)

He picked them up at noon today, and she's called here like, 4 times since they got here. The kids were getting ready for bed the last time, and I made a comment to dh about how many times she's called today and he thinks she's trying to prove a point. Whatever. So her last call got disconnected after about 5 minutes, and the kids went to bed. She called back and dh told her they were in bed, she started screaming at him!

I am typing up a proposed parenting plan for dh to bring to the mediation meeting on Thursday. It's going to say that she can't call here after 8:30 pm. She won't like that, but too bad. That's when they go to bed here. Can we limit how many times she calls in one 8 hour period? Geez!

[Brent]

>The judge hasn't even signed the order yet, and already they
>(dh and bm) are proving they cannot get along.

I hate to say it, but the likelihood of your DH ending up in court again is about 100%. :(

Start documenting everything now, if you haven't already. Get yourself either the Parenting Time Tracker (PTT) at: http://www.deltabravo.net/custody/tracker.htm or the OPTIMAL Custody Tracking service at: http://www.parentingtime.net. The PTT is free, but the OPTIMAL service is better when it's likely that you'll be back in court eventually.

[tulip]

Yeah, I know. Getting joint custody now, though, since she will agree to that, puts us in a much better position for getting full custody later. So we've been told. I was telling dh the first day after court, that if they end up back in front of that judge because they can't work their stuff out, there will be no chance of joint physical custody anymore.

We have been documenting all this crap for almost two years. We also have police reports on file of her messing with his visitation. We saw first hand that the judge does not look kindly on that. It would be nice to have some peace for a while for the kids sake, though. Hopefully they will get their issues worked out in mediation, so there won't be much left to fight about.

I think she's just freaking out because she can't handle the idea of not having control over everything anymore. I just hope this order goes through before she changes her mind. If she does, though, at least there is a court record of her telling the judge that he is absolutely wonderful with his kids. He He. That one's going to come back and bite her in the butt!

[StPaulieGirl]

I would turn the phone off at 8:30.  She's just being spiteful.  At least you have a judge who doesn't mess around, and you're documenting.  I've had so much stuff going on that I quit even bothering with it.  Not to mention all the defective hard drives.  All the stuff I did document on the time tracker went south....

The mother sounds like a real prize.  Good luck, and have a Happy Holiday!

[ksswthrt74]

There is a way you can put in the Parenting Plan how many times they can call the kids.  Here is the web site address for a Sample Parenting Plan, that I have used to try to get my X to agree to 50/50. Still waiting for his response.

Just edit it for your DH and Bm's needs and wants.

Good luck. Hopefully everyone will realize that its not about them, but its about the kids.


http://www.deltabravo.net/custody/articles.htm

[lucky]

pbfh's phone contact is "limited to two phone calls per day and one hour per call between the hours of 8am and 8pm".