Emergency ex-parte

[mykidsaremyworld]

My ex (never married) and I have shared custody of our son since 2004, revised in 2006, 50/50 both legal and physical, with many many hick-ups along the way.  Since our last court date we have both married and have another child in each household.  Our son is now 11 (almost 12) and has made it very clear to both his father and I that he wants to live at my household full time.  There have been many issues at his fathers household that have caused him to have anxiety attacks and a lot of emotional stress.  Most recently his father called me and told me that I'm not to have any contact with our son's grandparents (On his Dad's side of course).  He's also since told our son and his own Parents and Sisters that they can not contact each other while he is at their home, all because they "talk" to me.  They have also told me and my son that we are not to have any contact whatsoever while he is at their home?  I've recently been told that this of course is not only wrong, but completely illegal as well.  I've filed to go back to court for these issue and have Mediation in March, and court is not until April... in the mean time my son is having lot's of anxiety having to go back to his Fathers household.  Specially since his Dad told him he could choose which household he wanted to live at full time (because our son told him "sometimes he feels like dying), so he did.  He chose my household. Then his Dad told him because of his choice that he would not be allowed to continue at his school and he would make it his priority to see that he doesn't go to that school (since I don't live in that district), causing my son more anxiety and stress.  His Dad agreed to allow our son to live with us full time without going back to court.  He did this for only one week.  However, his Dad overheard a conversation my son and I had regarding the schooling situation and then changed his mind and said we'd have to go back to court before the change in custody.  Now my son will have to make this incredibly stressful choice all over again.   He's also stated that since this incident things with his Step Mother have been "strange" and the way she act's towards him (no physical harm, just mental and emotional) is hard for him.  His father is rarely home except on the weekends when he's not traveling for work, so he is left many times with only the Step Mother, Step sister, and half baby brother!  I was told to go file for an emergency ex-parte?  I do not have an attorney and am not sure where to go from here.  Any help would be greatly appreciated.  It's the worst feeling in the world when your son looks you in the face and says "I don't want to go back there, can't I just stay with you"... and you have to say "No, there's nothing I can do". 

[ocean]

You can call your family court and ask where the intake office is to file yourself. You would need to give a reason why. Might be a little hard since if you get custody, he would have to change schools. Once you fill out the paperwork, (go early) you should see a judge that day who will make a decision or make it go to a hearing or say you have to wait for April.

Is that a new work schedule for dad? If so, you can use that and ask that you have custody as dad is no longer home during the week, child is 12 and is not getting along with step mom and wants to live full time with you and visit when dad is home on his weekends. You can say, he allowed him to move for a week but now changed his mind.

Call the school and ask if they will allow him to finish this year with them, or maybe until Spring break and then switch schools after that.

[Davy]

I suggest you reconsider an "Emergency Ex-parte" action.  These actions are normally used when a child's (ren) circumstances and welfare are so dire that the child is at severe risk of harm to justify NOT notifying or involving the other parent.  A court may not look favorably on such action.   

In the eyes of the court it may appear the planned mediation and hearing is sufficient and PROPER for the matter at hand especially in consideration of the lenght of the joint arrangement, age of child, the inherent complexies of two separate familys with other sibblings, parenting skills, court availability, etc, etc, etc. 

[mykidsaremyworld]

I think that the simple fact that my son is having panic attacks when it's time to return to his fathers home is enough reason to take emergency step's.  Let's also not forget that he told his Dad "sometimes I feel like I want to die".  Then you have the whole illegal issue of them telling him he is not allowed to have any contact with me while at their household, because it's disruptive.  However, in most cases where there was contact with my son.  It was him (my son) initiating the conversation.  They have also told him he can not have contact with his Grandparents, Aunt's and other family members while in "their household".  It's like a cult, or prison for him.