PLEASE PLEASE HELP Interstate visitation question

[beeboah]

I am tired of waiting on freeadvice to get information that is biased and sexist.

However, when I post anywhere else, including here, it takes forever to get an answer.

I have the following problem:

I have a 6 year old son in Florida. I am the NCP. The CP and I have an agreement that we drafted and had signed by the judge in the child's legal jurisdiction (in Florida) whereas both parties split the financial cost and transportation of the child.

The agreement allows the child to come to Virginia several times per year.

My distance from the child is approximately 1000 miles.

The CP has opposed the following:

1) Use of any escort to accompany the child during his 2.5 hour trip.

(The CP insists that 3 round trip tickets are to be purchased...one for CP, NCP, and child for that trip) (The 2 other round trip tickets would be for the adults to transport the child)

2) Use of any form of transportation besides an airplane.

The above will hinder my ability to accomplish visitation due to my financial abilities. The dates of travel are all during blackout dates, and even after "deals" are found, even the CP finds it expensive.

A bit of history:

(When the child was 2 and I lived only 250 miles away the same judge considered transportation via a vehicle to be unreasonable and forced me to excercise visitation in the child's locale.) The child is 6 now though, and the judge has allowed interstate visitation with no indication of how it is to transpire.


I have the following questions:

1) If our present agreement does not provide any restrictions concerning the method of the child's travel, can I still pick him up by car?

2) Could my picking him up by car (especially for short durations that are legally intended to be excercised in Virginia) be looked down on by the judge and stopped if the CP decides to take me to court? (Remember transportation functions are to be split, so he could come home on a plane)

3) In our agreement, we specified that "financial responsibility is to be split by both parties", what if the CP's trip is more expensive than mine? Am I still liable for half of the overall cost for transportation, or have I effectively taken on half by driving him?

Thanks in advance for your advice!!

[Ref]

I don't think Freeadvice is very good either. If this board takes a long time, at least part of the reason is because most people who don't have helpful advice wont post wasted responses.

SD lives in Fl too. Dh and I live in PA. She has been flying as an unaccompnaies minor since she was 7 (now she is 14).

Here is what I think about your questions:

1. I think you could pick him up by hot air balloon if you wanted to. There is nothing unreasonable about you having a road trip with your son.

2. You say that visitation is allowed in Virginia. What is the exact wording? If it say you may have it in Viginia, it does not preclude having it elsewhere and I would think you would be in the clear. Please post that portion of your visitation order.

3. This may be something that is cleared up by posting the wording in you agreement as well. Does it say who pays initially and how they are to be reimbursed? If not, I would think that you could pay your car ride and she can buy the tickets for the kid's ride home.

Good Luck

Ref

[MixedBag]

Three long distance divorces in our family too.

6 years old....

In the beginning when my son was little, I did just that and bought 3 tickets in order to bring him from WV to AL.  I suggest that you consider this for your child in order to alleviate any fears about flying on their own.

Not every time, but maybe once or twice.

Then you gotta find an airline that flies non-stop (try //www.flyi.com -- independent air out of Dulles) for a while until your child gets old enough to make a transfer/connection.

Otherwise, don't let the CP make up rules that just aren't in the divorce decree.

Yes, you can drive down, get your child and drive back.

Then let her figure out how to get the child back -- maybe she'll drive up, pick up the child and drive back.

Of course, for long distances, it's a lot of traveling for the child in one weekend.  I too get one weekend a month but I don't bring my son back down here.  I drive 12 hours (or fly some of it), pick him up, spend the weekend, and then make my way home.  He only comes here if it's for the summer, and the one week over Thanksgiving, Christmas, and Easter (which alternates each year).

[beeboah]

I apologize to the two of you for taking so long to return to this post....now I am a hypocrite lol!

I am just in awe that for the 1st time since my divorce in 2k1 I am getting some unbiased advise.

I will respond to this post soon once I get my stipulation to you.

Thanks so much for this advice!!