What constitutes separation in state of virginia?

[setmefree]

We live in state of virginia. We are separated in the same house which is allowed in virginia. what constitutes separation? certainly no sex. what about dinner together and the kids? what if someone comes to visit us.

My sense is that my attorney has a very narrow view of it.  she thinks even going on grocery shopping together breaks the separation.

Do you have a good description of what constitutes separation in virginia?

RS

[socrateaser]

>We live in state of virginia. We are separated in the same
>house which is allowed in virginia. what constitutes
>separation? certainly no sex. what about dinner together and
>the kids? what if someone comes to visit us.
>
>My sense is that my attorney has a very narrow view of it.
>she thinks even going on grocery shopping together breaks the
>separation.
>
>Do you have a good description of what constitutes separation
>in virginia?

Separation occurs when one of the spouses forms the mental intent that the marriage not continue. Obviously, proving someone's mental state must be done via external testimony and evidence, despite the seemingly subjective nature of the test.

The problem, then, is that when you spend time together, a reasonable trier of facts (a judge) could conclude that neither of you had formed the requisite mental state, or that both of you had abandoned said mental state.

Your attorney is taking the side of due caution. The fact that you live together gives an independent observer cause to wonder if you are actually "separated" under the definition. If you eat together and are seen in public doing things together, and you live in the same home, and you have entered into a legal marriage on some past date, then a judge might simply say, "If it looks, smells, tastes, feels and sounds like a duck, well then, it's a duck -- and you two people are not separated -- you're married."

So, I suggest that you not be seen in public doing anything together, because you are acting as if you are still a married couple.

[setmefree]

Socrateaser, thank you very much.

rs