Dr Phil called .... could it be he wants me ..... naw

[hagatha]

hey guys,

Anyone here who has been following the Dr Phil "family" knows that good ol Dr phil has been a bit inaccurate with his advise about the new baby.

In fact, I felt he was so off base I sent him a letter.  There were quite a number of things he has said, or not said. Done or not done that will have a major impact on the mothers family, the baby and the fathers family. Mostly, the father was Not being given a fair shake.  As well as the message he is conveying to his viewing audience about the importance of DADS!!!!!

Much to my suprise I got a call from one of his staff people. It seems they will be doing a "Talk back to Phil" show this will that will air in Jan. During the conversation the staff member asked me if I would be interested in appearing ON the show to debate the good Dr. I of course said "Where and when".  The conversation with the staffer continued and he finally told me a producer would be in touch, later that night.

Who is suprised I wasn't called?????

After waiting another day, I wrote to the staffer and asked if why. ("coupd it be the powers of the show don't want to upset the base audience?)

No sooner was the e-mail sent when the phone rang. It was the same staffer again. He explained the producers were "Going in a different direction" although some of my comments would be addressed by other guests. (yeah, ok) BUT that he would keep my info on file for the next "talk back" show taping in late Feb. Oh and would I consider coming out then.

I am now placing bets on if I get called again........

$10 says NO!!

I did invite Dr Phil to join us in chat, but don't expect him anytime soon.

I really wish he would have the balls to really go one-on-one with me. He could have such a positive impact on how dad's are not just wallets.

The Witch



Remember . . . KARMA is a Wonderful Thing!!!!!

[MKx2]

Haggie ... I've watched this whole thing and I never got the feeling he was not in favor of the father's involvement.  Perhaps some comments went by me.  I'm not debating what you've posted in this regard, but could you briefly post your take on this?

What I got out of it was that when this whole issue began (with Dr. Phil's inclusion) was that the young man and his family were called about appearing on the show etc.  They unequivically refused.  I "thought" that one of his requests for involving this kid (and his family) with all of this was that a committment be made to seeing it through - not just appear on the show and then get on with his own life, popping in and out from time to time.

There was also a segment with his mother on the telephone which I believe Dr. P cut short as the mom/paternal grandmother was asked some "yes/no" questions which she would side-step only to criticize Alex and her family.  I believe there had been offers on Dr. P's part to provide counseling for all of them (Alex and father, and all his immediate family), which was also refused.

The family situation of Alex is extremely complex and about as highly dysfunctional as I've seen - so much so that I really don't know if any one of them will ever pull their respective heads out of the sand.

I'm not challenging anything you posted ... I truly want to know what I missed.

[sweetnsad]

I got a call from one of Dr. Phil's producers about a year ago to do a show on co-parenting.  I had wrote him a letter about our situation.  I got an initial phone call stating they were interested in my case and wanted to know if I would appear with Dr. Phil.  Of course I said Yes..

A couple of days later, she called again to ask me some questions.  Kind of along the lines of whether I was mentally stable, ever been incarcerated, etc....they have to know these things before they allow you on the show in case you try to beat poor ole Dr. Phil up!!!
Anyway, she said they would contact me with all the details and guess what?  I never heard from her again...

So, don't hold your breath...But, I hope you get that chance like I never did...

[hagatha]

M,

The very 1st thing I had a problem with was the whole adoption issue. The family Alex especially was supposed to explore the idea of adoption and they went as far as having several couples interviewed by Alex and her mother. The way it was presented, IMHO made it seem like Alex could decide Adoption was the best option for her and the baby and place the baby with one of the couples. I never saw or heard anything about the actual Legalities of placing the baby. Or the fact the father would have to agree to terminate his right also. Adoption was presented as a viable option for Alex when in actuality it was not.

The 2nd big thing I had a problem with, was after the baby was born Phil and Alex had a discussion about the fathers involvement. Phil asked her if she wanted the father involved and she said no. His response was something to the effect "Well, would you like me to talk with them?".
The way That was presented, to me at least, was "OK I'll tell them to back off and see what I can do to have them leave you and the baby alone."

I also remember a call the dad made to Alex about seeing the baby. She told him she thought he would be a bad influence and Dr Phil  thought the father (and family) should have some sessions with him before visits would take place. (also mom was in the background encouraging her to Not allow dad to see his baby ... AND the fathers family were only permitted to see the baby at the mothers house and never allowed to have the baby alone. In effect making any contact between the dad (and family) with the baby supervised.)

This could all be handled much better. I don't think there is any reason the dad or his family should be made to look like bad people simply because they don't want to appear on the show. Or because their beliefs about parenting are different from Phil's. And I think because that have declined, they are being presented as unreasonable, selfish, bad people.

That's just my feelings

The Witch
Remember . . . KARMA is a Wonderful Thing!!!!!

[MKx2]

Thanks for the reply ... now, see I took several of the events you described differently.  Ain't it amazing how two people can look at the EXACT same thing and come away with different impression?

I'm not saying that it couldn't have been handled differently.  I also think that there was a LOT that went on "behind the scenes" so to speak that might clarify some of what we DID see and/or hear ... both your and my perceptions.

To say the least it is an extremely difficult situation.  Alex, while giving the appearance of the caring mom, is still just a 15 yo girl.  I don't think she explored, fully, ANY of  the issues she was asked to explore by Dear Phil, just because she is a "child" still and just doesn't have the cognitive and reasoning ability of an "adult" (not to say that "adults" would handle it any better).

I certainly would be interested in getting the father's side of things, along with his parents.  It  most definitely could color things in a far different manner.  And, overall, I think the message being sent out is that dad's do NOT count ... Dr P has never said that, in fact he has said the opposite, however; the aired segments do not support the words, and sadly this is what most of America sees.

Thanks again for posting - I appreciate you taking the time!

[Brent]

Dr. Phil, in my opinion, is not very impressive.

He mouths sugary platitudes that have no real substance, and he's a little too fond of the 'snappy sound bite' method of communication.

In most cases whatever he says is simple common sense and nothing genuinely insightful. Once in a while he says something that's meaningful, but most of what he says is staged to appeal to the people who watch TV between 9am and 3pm.

Nothing personal against Dr. Phil, but I'm just not that taken with him. He could have a temendous impact on the way fathers are regarded, but he won't go there- it's not in line with his target demographic (the 9am to 3pm TV crowd).