Court date Dec 15

[lookinnomore]

Quick background:  Two Boys 13 and 11 have lived with dad and me (live in girlfriend) for the last 4 almost 5 years.  Mom filed for custody about 6 months ago.  Not sure what her grounds were other than she got married and bought a house.  No changes in the boys life.

Went through the Home Study, interview with Social Services although the lady never spoke to me (the live in girlfriend).  Spent a lot of time with CF, spent 5 or so minutes with the boys, and the same with my girls who also live in the house.  After speaking to the children she spoke to CF again, she said at most she thought the boys could do with more time with mom, but, doesn't see a reason to move custody.  

Question:  Do you believe what they tell you, or do you think they tell both sides what they want to hear?

Made contact with GAL as soon as we got the name, some months ago.  GAL wanted to speak with the mother and find out why she (mom)  had filed for change of custody.  Called back to GAL at her request, right before court date (set for the 15th) and see what she (GAL) wanted to do.  GAL and home study give their advice on the 15th and then I guess it is set for trial.  GAL tells CF, mom never called her, so GAL doesn't want to see CF or the children.  I am NOT complaining, as long as things go well for us. haha

Question is:  Anyone else have things done like this?  What would you make of this?  

Hate to be a worrier but I am.

[shawneetears]

I haven't had to go through a GAL so I'm not sure I can answer your question but I had some questions that might give you something to think about...not to worry you but if it becomes an issue you need to know how to respond to it...

ok, was custody set when you were live in GF or did you move in after.....  some judges (particularly conservative ones) really frown on GF or BF living in home with children present....to others it doesn't matter; if you were already a part of the household before custody was last set then it should not be an issue.  If you are new on the scene since the last time custody was set then look out..... your attorney should be able to advise you if this is a problem and will  either suggest you move out or get  married... it all depends on the judge.

BTW, If you haven't already figured it out...GF's (or BF's) have absolutley no standing... second spouses generally have a little standing.... but at 11 and 13....the judge will probably pay close attention to what the boys want (all other things being pretty equal)

Look closely at the complaint to find out why BM would think there has been a significant change in circumstances.....  
It's more likely that BM will be given more time with boys before a complete change of custody would be ordered.....  you might try "tossing the other side a bone"  and agree to a modification of visitation....that would keep everyone out of court.  If that wont' work then you will simply have to address the issues that come up in court.  As long as you have done your homework things should be ok but given the GAL's opinion that the boys need more time with mom....I would expect that to be what happens unless you can prove why that would be detrimental to the boys.
wish you all the best life has to offer!  :)

[lookinnomore]

I lived with dad when SHE GAVE him custody.

Change of custody says, she has a "more suitable" home.  No change of circumstance.  Boys are thriving with us, good grades, play sports for their school teams.  

More time with the boys for her would be great, we can't get them to go with her when it is her time. She has NEVER asked for more time, that she wasn't given more time.

SHe had extra time on Thanksgiving weekend, in 4 days she had, she had to call the police the last day cause she can't control what goes on in her household.

[Ref]

nm