Ceremony ideas

[DecentDad]

Hi,

I think your six year old will remember quite a bit.

The big question is... what is her relationship like with you, and how does she feel about the marriage?

The answer to that question will help you decide what role would be fair for her to take in the wedding.

In my marriage (i.e., my daughter is from a never-married relationship), my now 4 year old daughter has known my wife as long as she can remember.  Passive attempts to alienate have only caused daughter to ignore us in her mother's presence, but as soon as biomom is gone, she can love us and be affectionate to us.

To minimize opportunity for poison, biomom didn't know about the wedding until last minute.  By that time, daughter was already pretty excited about it.

We were careful to not put a burden on HER during the ceremony, after all the marriage was between my wife and I.

However, after we said our vows to each other and exchanged rings, we brought up my daughter.  My wife (now stepmom) and I made vows under God to continue to love, nurture, and protect my daughter; and we told her how happy we were that she could be with us on our wedding day, and we both placed a pendant necklace on her as a symbol of all that.

So-- daughter felt no guilt (i.e., because she didn't have to make any vow to us and feel conflicted about biomom), but she walked away knowing that she was still just as special and important.

Also, my daughter sat at the head table with my wife and I.

That was six months ago, and my daughter still talks about the wedding and looks at the photos.

Thanks to Disney, it's always about being a princess who gets married and lives happily ever after.  So your six year old should buy into it no problem!  :)

Best wishes for your marriage, and growing family!

DD

[kelly563]

Is she participating in the ceremony? How about Flower Girl?  Junior Bridesmaid? Walking with her parent down the aisle...and remaing at the alter for the ceremony with her parent? Also....ask officiant to include her...usually they have great ideas for including children!!! And...she will remember more than you think!!!!!