Another Question for you about Visitation

[missy]

We are the NCP parents of 2 children. (ages 7, 5) The court order is set up for IN Visitation Guidelines.  Support is paid on time and current and we provide extras too.  BM has denied visitation numerous times.  We have her on tape denying visitation and police records as well.

Also, we have witnessess and tapes of her bad mouthing the kids about us and they come to us all the time telling us things she says about us.

We have talked to her and also went to an attorney w/ the contempt charges.  Nothing seems to get done and another court date is always set up. My questions are:

1)What has to be proven to get the contempt charges on her?

2)Is there anything we can do to show that she is ruining the childrens emotional well being?

3)Would it be better to drop our current attorney and just go into court on our own?

Thanks!!

[patton]

For an NCP to file contempt charges you must have "Hard" evidence.  Can you use tapes in court? Do you have witnesses that are NOT relatives?  Do you have any other written evidence?  Maybe your attorney doesn't think you have enough evidence that is usable in court.

I filed 6 contempts and won 5 of them.  The one I didn't win, the CP lied on the witness stand, as she did on all the other 5, but I couldn't find the doctor's report at the time to prove she was lying.  Actually once I knew she was quilty of the others I didn't look very hard.

She got 5 years probation and had to pay my attorney fees, and my son was on 3 years old when this happened.  I now have sole custody of him.

[socrateaser]

>1)What has to be proven to get the contempt charges on her?

To prove contempt you must show by "clear and convincing evidence," that (1) there is a valid, enforceable court order, (2) that the defendant knows of the order, and (3) that the defendant, with willful and conscious disregard, violated the order. The first two elements are pretty easy to prove, but the third is not. You must show that the defendant's act or failure to act was intentional, i.e., that he/she meant to do it. Then you must show that the defendand knew that what he/she did would violate the court order. And you must show all of these things with substantial evidence, i.e., the judge must be convinced to a reasonable certainty, that the defendant did these things.

If you prove these things so that the judge has little doubt that the other parent acted or failed to act as you describe, and what you describe violates the order, then you get your contempt -- otherwise, you don't.

If you have lawfully recorded evidence showing the mother in the act of disparaging you, then that evidence would be a pretty clear and convincing demonstration of her bad faith. However, unless your court order states that she can't disparage you, then there's no contempt, because she's not ordered to refrain from her disparagement.

Similarly, if the mother is frustrating your access to the kids, and you have third party disinterested witnesses who will swear to being with you when the mother refused to transfer the children to you, then you have grounds for contempt. But, if all you have is a police report stating that you told the police that you were at the mother's house to pick up the kids at a certain date and time, and the police weren't there to see you actually trying to retrieve the children, and the mother either not there, or refusing you out of hand, then you have no contempt.

The point is, that it's not enough that you know someone else has done you wrong. You must prove it to the point that the judge will have difficulty believing that anything else other than what you say happened, actually happened.

>2)Is there anything we can do to show that she is ruining the
>childrens emotional well being?

Move for a new custody hearing on grounds that the mother's bad mouthing you in front of the children is causing them severe mental distress, and ask for the kids to be evaluated by a therapist regarding your concerns.

>3)Would it be better to drop our current attorney and just go
>into court on our own?

I don't know your attorney, I don't know how well you know the legal process, and I don't know how comfortable you are in a courtroom, so I can't really advise you on this.