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Mediation - CS modification

Started by Ref, Jun 26, 2004, 05:08:19 AM

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Ref

Last month DH went to mediation for change in visitation. He got everything he asked for minus 1 week. BM decided to pull out the "big guns" and try to discuss CS mod at the same time.

Bottom line. Mediation agreement states that they are to make reasonable efforts to agree on CS and make available all financial info to each other. If they can't agree on their own, they have to go back to mediation before seeking the court's help. BM has not called or written a single letter about CS in a month since the mediation. Is it DH's responsibility to start talks, or can he just wait until PB starts?


rini

hello

it is always better to make an effort to negotiate in the courts eyes

send your financial info and give her 7 days to respond in kind..

if she does not provide you with her stuff then file for a hearing date

if you have some idea of what she makes and i mean with in 1000 a year then i can help you come up with an offer if you would like but if you are in the dark as to her income i suggest that you get her info before you proceed.  i would need the state info and any other relevant information to help .



rini

Ref

Not to sound stingy or anything, but BM is one of those who hasn't held a real job in 10 years, has been on welfare for the majority of the time, and obviously been using CS as income. BM is also one of those who uses a raise in CS as a threat. She doesn't ever ask him for money other than that because that would require letting him know what is going on in SD's life.

DH Has worked his a** off to make the money he makes today and spends a load on clothes and other necessities SD needs and puts away for college. He has also made it clear that anything SD needs, he will pay for.

He will have an increase in CS if it goes through the courts. The fact BM isn't pushing for more CS is weird but provides a couple of months without the increase. (enough time to pay off some of the legal bills she forced him into).

I guess the question is, would it look bad if he didn't start negotiations or would it be a stalemate because she hasn't made an effort either?

rini

hi

mediation has set in writing that you are to try to come to an agreement

if neither party makes an effort then you are both at fault.

i hear you about the bm being a leach!!!  been there done that....



does your state impute income (what state are u in)

rini

Peanutsdad

As far as I would be concerned,, she was the one that wanted to initiate the action on cs,, Ball is in her court. If she does nothing with it,, you on the other hand are happy with current cs,, ergo! nothing to discuss. If she does nothing, I would let it die a quiet death.

rainbow1

You want to show that you made an effort and received no response or cooperation. Send her or better have your attorney send her a letter stating you have your financial info ready to exchange. Do not give her your info without getting hers if that is what was ordered! Send  the letter certified mail so you have proof she received it. Give her a deadline of 14 days to respond . If she doesn't respond notify the mediator you had and request another session. Know what you want when you get there, if she's been non-responsive or ignored the mediator's instructions, you may get what you ask for. I did!!!