Buying Cadillac's with support

[leftoverinmn]

Hi everybody!! I'm new here, thought I'd throw down a question here, since every other forum I've been to has been little help.

I live in MN, my bf pays his Xwife over $1000 in support for their three kids. She just bought a new Caddy! Oh, it's nice, tan leather interior, gold rims, onstar. However, the children have no winter jackets. At parent teacher conferences, the youngest girl had on her sister's old shoes. They are clothed like street urchins, they didn't get new clothes for school this fall. Their mother said it wasn't in the budget. I took them out yesterday, and bought shoes for the girls, and winter jackets for all three. I sew patches on their jeans for them, dad can't afford to buy new ones as he's been run into poverty.

Is there any legal recourse that can be taken for misuse of child support? I understand that Cadillac's have the highest government crash test rating, and are safe cars to haul the children around in, but they have no decent clothes! At conferences, she was carrying a SPAMSPAMSPAM Marukami Speedy handbag. They go for over a thousand dollars. Is this legal for her to splurge the child support on herself when the children have no winter jackets?

[Wi-Mom]

Frustrating isn't it? Honestly your DH has absolutely no say in what she spends that money on. I'm sure your only recourse is to go back to court.

THE BEST divorce attorneys happen to be right in your neck of the woods.. and they have a bulletin board where you can post questions such as these, and an awesome attorney (He's known around here as LAWMOE) can tell you what options you have in MN. If you go to court I'd hire them. Here's their site....


http://www.divorceprofessionals.com/

Best wishes.. and be prepared for the most frustrating years of your life because it never ends.

[wendl]

All I can say is I know exactly how you feel and many of us here do to.

I know if my ex ever wanted to know what I spend the cs I get (when I get it) I could show him receipts for eveything. I spend my cs (when I get it on my son)

But some cp's don't ,they just want to bleed the other parent dry, and that doesn't help the kids as the ncp cannot afford to buy clothing while the kids are in their care (due to the cp not providing clothing for overnights)

Personally I think each state should make the cp get the cs credit card and provide the ncp with the monthly statement which shows what the cs has been spent on (yea like that will every happen, but I think it would be a good idea, if I got cs on a regular basis, I would have no problem doing this and giving my ex the statement.



**These are my opinions, they are not legal advice**

[joni]

Our situation is not as bad but just as frustrating.  Our atty told us the only way a custodial parent can be held accountable for child support is if they're not providing for their children.  Sounds like your case is very close to this.  You need to get 3rd parties to vouch that kids aren't provided for, like their teachers or parents of their friends.  If it's just your BF and the BM going back and forth in court, it'll just end up being a he said/she said and go nowhere.

[leftoverinmn]

I'm livid. Absolutely enraged.

Dad was chatting online with his son last night. Mommy dearest confiscated the boots that I bought for the children.  Appearently, Doc Martins are affiliated with white supremasists and neo-nazis. Funny thing, considering I bought them and I'm half Jewish!!!!!

But I guess she knows better then I, as she has a degree in Women's Studies. WHAT IS THAT! WHAT DO YOU DO WITH A DEGREE IN "WOMEN'S STUDIES"!!

Sell tires???

I want those boots back, dammit. Oh, I could spit. GRRRRR!!

[stepmomtwo1]

>>
>Personally I think each state should make the cp get the cs
>credit card and provide the ncp with the monthly statement
>which shows what the cs has been spent on (yea like that will
>every happen, but I think it would be a good idea, if I got cs
>on a regular basis, I would have no problem doing this and
>giving my ex the statement.



This would be a great idea! Prove that you actually spend that money on things that the child "needs"

You are not alone at all my dear. Last year bb took us back to court for more money because she could show "need" for more. We barley make ends meet and she hasn't worked a day in 15 years...how can you need money but not see the need to work? Hummm I'm confused about that one...we need money and guess what ? We both have jobs. Amazing concept isn't it?

Well we only have 9 months of cs left and the ex just bought a tanning bed. It might be her last major purchase on our money but I'm sure there will be a few more before Sept. gets here.

It's so wrong that the kids do without so she can drive a new car..I hope the kids actually see what you and their dad do for them. Many times in situations like yoursthe ex works hard at trying to make herself look like the great parent even though she's doing nothing to help the kids.

There are some great ex's out there too bad we didn't get one.

[joni]

Now you know to keep the boots at your house.  This mom is always going to find a way to stick it to you guys.  Stop giving her ammo.   Give her enough rope, she'll hand herself with these kids.

[leftoverinmn]

Grrrr!

I guess it's tuition in the school of life. What good do boots do when they can only wear them 8 days a month?

The jackets are gone as well. Carhart supports 2nd amendment rights according to her.

Thank you guys so much. It really means alot to me, knowing there are others out there going throught the same thing. I appreciate your time, and I'm truely glad you're here.

[joni]

But those 8 days a month those kids are at your house will be the best days of the month for them.  They'll be warm and clean and well fed and LOVED!  

And your stepchildren will know you for this.  They already do.....

[patton]

Texas had a new law enacted last year.  If a CP gets more than $750 per month in C/S  the NCP can require an accounting of what the money is spent on for the children.

Don't know exactly how this works and if other states have a law similar to this or not.