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I need direction.

Started by PootiesPater, Apr 30, 2008, 01:24:32 PM

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PootiesPater

     Good Day All,

 I have a 4 year old daughter, she'll be 5 next month, and have been seperated from her mother, my spouse, for just under 3 years. My wife insisted on the seperation because her financial demands were not being met. We were married all of 6 months before she started to demand that I acquire another job, that pays more, because she wants to do big things and have financial security. I had worked at my job for 15+ years and just went back to school, the job was paying for it, so I could find a more lucrative career. But it wasn't happening fast enough for her so she pretty much checked out of the marriage. For 5 years I endured her disrespect toward myself, friends, family especially my mother.
 It was 5 years later, our daughter, was 2 years old, when I gave in to her insistence for the seperation.; due to my wifes' escalation of belligerent behavior toward me and in front of our daughter.
 We tried to to be civil in the seperation process, however, the moment I moved out she put our lives into the system by filing for custody and child support. My wife is not the mothering type so she took just enough custody to be awarded custodial custody, therefore receiving child support and the per diem we received toward raising our daughter which we adopted the previous year.
 We agreed on the amount I would pay for child support based on her continuing to use the per diem stipend for daycare/school tuiton. Not even a year later she was demanding more money from me even though I was out of work on long term disability. I was downsized while still recovering from the surgery that lead to me being on disability and out of work for 15 months. During this time my wife filed for an increase in support, however, told me she'd withdraw it if I kicked in another $200 a month so she could put our daughter in a more expensive pre-k program.
 Due to my strong aversion to "being in the system" I made sacrifices and came up with another $200 a month. This money is paid directly to the school from me. Well, somebody told my wife that she can get even more money from me if she takes me back to court for a modification and that is exactly what she has done.
 At the time of the filing I was making $12 less an hour than I was before I was let go from my job of now 20+ years. When the court date arrived I had added anothoer $10 to my salary by fevershly searching for better employment.  The master that sat over our case based her ruling on the amount of money I used to make, at my job of over 20 years. She did, however, overlook the $200 a month I paid toward tuiton, I am not fully recovered from my surgery yet, I have my daughter more of the wakening hours than does my wife, I feed her dinner every night, I have my daughter most of the weekends in a month and that I am making less money now than what we initially agreed upon.
 I know this is quite lenghty, sorry about that, but I am looking for some type of direction on fairness. I/we live in Delaware County, PA which I have been told only has the interest of the mother concerning domestic situations.

leon clugston

Standards set forth for child support mandate youre ability to make at youre potental...however in youre case, not being willfully underemployed, being on disability mandates a reduction in support....
this is a federal guideline, and is held in the federal register,,which is a mandated law that the states cannot circumnavigate..and this all can be reconfirmed under title 42 U.S.C 654-669, and title 45 CFR's

PootiesPater

    Thank you for responding.  I have yet to file for Social Security Disability, however, my family believes it will allow me to get the attention needed to overcome the various things that I suffer from.  I will utilize the information that you supplied me with.  I respectfully accept any other advise or guidance you may offer as well.

Have A Blessed Day!