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New day, new story

Started by tulip, Apr 22, 2004, 10:48:08 AM

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tulip

BM is a total flake. One day, she is moving, one day, she isn't. One day, she is pissed because she found out her bf is sleeping with many women, the next day, she is moving in w/him.

She received a letter from atty asking her to promise in writing that she will not be using drugs this w/e or have the kids in contact w/her bf per judge's order. When dh talked to her about this last night, she got all pissed. She said he is controlling everything about her life, and she can't take it anymore. (Because he doesn't want her to be high with the kids?) She said she is signing the agreement he sent her to get this over with. (Thank goodness)

Today, she has a different story. What are we supposed to do? She failed a drug test, and has not taken anymore since then, even though she was supposed to. I don't want dh to get in any more trouble for not letting the kids go with her for the weekend, but I just don't see how he can.

Then, the kids are going to be terribly disappointed because of course she promised them she would pick them up Friday. If we don't let them go, then WE'RE the mean guys who are trying to take these poor kids away from their mom.

hisliltulip

I personally would ask your attorney.  That's what he's there for.

It really is a catch 22 isn't it?  She's tested positive therefore shouldn't be by the kids.  But the TCO gives her rights and doesn't address the issue if she shows up unclean.  The judge really dropped the ball on that one.

Check with the attorney.  This isn't a decision you shouldn't have to make.


hisliltulip

Did She sign the agreement so that she could see the kids?

tulip

We got an e-mail from atty on Fri saying that she faxed him a letter at 2am complaining about our "manipulation" and cited MN statutes on deprivation of parental rights. She called dh to tell him she had sent the letter, and wanted to pick up the kids from school. Since she said the day before that she wasn't going to do that, he told the kids to ride the bus home after school, so he told her he would bring them to her house about 5:00. She called back later and told him that she wanted the kids to walk over to the neighbor's at about 6:30, cause they were having dinner there. She didn't show up til almost 7:00, and had to drive sd to a sleepover right away. Then at 8:30pm sat, she brought ss back, wearing the same clothes he went to school in Fri, and then went to pick up sd and brought her back here.
The co says dh can pick them up Sun for church, and bring them back to her after church and they stay with her Sun night. She calls at 8:30am Sunday and leaves a message that she just got home from work (the job she said she lost a few days ago) and was going to bed. So she blew off her time w/them on Sun.
Mon she is supposed to pick them up and spend the evening w/them for her 1 night a week visitation, and she blew that off too.
She got into an argument with dh on the phone Mon morning and said she is going to tell the judge to take the kids away from both of them and put them in foster care. What a nut!

Sunshine1

What a looney tune!  Is she represented?  Man I hope you are getting all this documentation!  She has really lost it.  If I were her I would be doing everything in my power to get my failed drug test thrown out, and spending every waking minute with the children.

This has got to make you guys feel good about the upcoming court stuff right?  I know it feels pretty crappy that she keeps sh*tting on the children, but you can't reason with a drug addict.  I have a few in my family and they argue that you AGREE with them that the sky is blue. LOL!

Hang in there Tulip, you guys are in for a bumpy ride.  I think about you all the time!!  I will keep praying for you guys!! :)

tulip

Nope, she doesn't have an atty. She tried to get a free one, but they can only spend a limited amount of time on a case, and she said dh has filed so much paperwork, they will never have time to go through it. We're pretty confident about the upcoming hearing, but wish she would just sign the papers like she said she would, so we don't have to go to court. It's costing so much $$!

Yeah, I can't believe her! She failed three drug tests, so she quit taking them. Wouldn't it be good to KEEP taking them, so she could prove she quit? But of course, that won't work if ya don't quit! Even I am surprised that she blew off her time with them last night. Last week, she was calling every day right when they got home from school. Now, she hasn't called for two days.

SS talked to his school counselor today. DH has been in to talk to her a couple times, so she already knows what's going on. He told dh that he went to see her. He said he is confused and doesn't know who to believe, because mom tells him one thing, and dad tells him another. She pointed out that mom is doing drugs, and dad is the one taking care of him. She told him people who use drugs lie a lot, and he should probably believe dad. Nice to know someone is on his side for a change!

hisliltulip

Watch out Tulip.  I hope you guys are keeping all of her craziness documented.

I have friends who went through this kind of crap.  BM lied on stand (all teary-eyed of course) and said that she had been refused visitation and phone calls.  Which was a complete lie, she had stopped calling and rarely even showed up for visitation.

Luckily (?) she's finally screwed up BIG time and got locked up.

The boy (14) is doing lots better now.  Much more laid back and happy.  He was always worried about her.  Now he's not exactly happy that she's in jail, but is happy that she's atleast sober and eating where she's at!

Hang in there, and thank the stars that the counselor is talking straight with that little boy!

This may be a long road for you all, but well worth the sacrifice to save those kids!

God Bless,

BETH

tulip

This am bm called to talk to dh. She didn't think ss would be home and was surprised when he answered the phone. She asked dh if she could see him this week to make up the time that she blew off. He said no.
Then she showed up at ss's school to discuss all this with him over lunch. How nice of her to ruin his day huh? The counselor called dh and told him ss is having a very bad day. He is so confused and doesn't know who to believe.

hisliltulip

What a b*tch!

"Oh, poor wittle me!  SS, your Daddy is being so unfair not letting me see you, just because I was too irresponsible to show up...(wimper, wimper, sigh)".

I feel for you Tulip.  Keep your wits about you and don't crack the idiot (even though I'm sure you really really want to!).

You're in my prayers.

BETH