Help! Mom with custody taking kids to Florida! (LONG)

[navydadinmd]

Disclaimer~ None of the following statements are intended to defame or slander anyone. These are opinions.

Hi everyone...I'm new here. This may be really long...sorry.

I am a 16 year active duty member of the Navy still serving in Norfolk, Va. I was stationed in Maryland at the time we split and she filed.  My ex and I separated in may 04. The divorce DRAGGED out until about 3 weeks ago when it went final. We both had attorneys, but I can't help but wonder if the 2 attorneys were "in bed" with each other as they are former colleagues and the outcome was so lopsided and unfair...I feel as though my attorney completely mishandled the case or that there may have been some kickbacks and dirty dealing going on. It was a long, drawn out and nasty divorce.

I'm considering having a BAR investigation initiated. ~Advice here would be great.

Continuing; Shortly after I was served, my ex relocated to Roanoke, Va. and I was (under normal orders) was transferred to a ship in Norfolk, Va. There was a consent order from St. Mary's county Md. (divorce venue) Giving her physical and legal custody, child support and the mini-van(good riddance). She used to meet me halfway on my visits (every orher weekend and alt holidays) but after hooking up with boyfriend, stopped and refused. My attorney walked me into another consent order that now mandates me to provide all transportation.

There have been issues since her move that have had us in court in Roanoke county: her last boyfriend (a separated live-in) took pix of my 5yo daughter on the toilet..."joking around". The investigation revealed no criminal activity, but judge admonished her and boyfriend. She retaliated by filing bogus assault charges that I was aquitted of. Again she was admonished by the SAME judge!

She broke up with last boyfriend about 5 months ago and has now gone to Florida recently to hook-up with a new boyfriend from the past. This is 2 different guys she has introduced to my kids in the last year.

My kids (b-11/g-9/g-5) don't get enough time with me as it is and now she is telling me that she is going to be moving herself and the kids to Jacksonville to be with this new guy!!! Another sailor. My son has stated that he doesn't want to move and I don't think the girls have much say as their Mom has said that it is her choice not theirs.

My Son has been honor roll forever, I just learned that his grades and performance have dropped significantly.

My current girlfriend have been together for 2 years and have been planning our wedding for the spring.

Helpful opinions??? Advice??? Similar stories???

If you're still reading this...Thank you!

Shawn

[SMD130]

Deleted by sender

[mistoffolees]

As far as the Bar investigation, I'd forget it. First, you're going to have a very hard time proving anything. Second, even if you can prove something, you won't get your daughter back. Third, you're going to need an attorney and if you bring someone up on charges, your options drop - fast.

As for the rest, she has sole legal and physical custody. Is there any wording in the agreement about out of state moves? If not, you're probably out of luck. You MIGHT be able to go back to the judge who has admonished her twice and ask for a change in custody due to her misbehavior and the change of circumstances (your pending marriage). There's a chance that you might be able to convince him that it's not in the child's best interest to go to FL, but it sounds pretty tough to me.

Personally, I'd find a new lawyer (if you're not happy with the one you have, you should change - even if there were no trust issues), and ask them what options you have.

[navydadinmd]

Thanks...I was kind of figuring it would be like "whizzing" in the wind!!!

I am looking into the option of taking up the fight in "mom's" jurisdiction. Hopefully I can get the same judge to hear it. The divorce is final now and so this will be a whole new fight. I just wish I had found this site sooner! I really got jammed by a seemingly biased official and intimidated, non-agressive and fearful attorney.

On the positive side though, I've been contacted by another individual from this site who has been through the same court system as I have and has been through very similar circumstances. Needless to say...he has opened my eyes in just a few short emails. Thank God for this site!