In State Limbo and "Available"

[Step Mom]

My Husband has two children that live in another state (Texas).  They lived in New Jersey before when the modification was filed and have lived in Texas since August.

The custodial mother has denied visitation and we are planning to send the "Intent to Excercise Visitation" and "Denial of Visitation" Letters for visits according to the modification in the future.  What we need to know is that if we send a copy of these letters to the court in New Jersey, will we be able to use that file in a case we file in Texas after August when the juristiction is switched for the children since they will have lived there a year?  Since there is not yet a case in Texas, can we not send a copy of the letters to Texas?  Please help us if you know.

Also, my husband's modification reads for visitation during the school year that "the children will be available for visitation when there is an extended break in the school year".  Does this mean that we are entitled to the entire break or just a time frame the mother decides?  If she decides, what keeps her from saying that she made them available for a day or even a week out of a two week break?  Since we live so far away, sometimes we drive and that can take a couple or three days to retrieve the children.  Thank you in advance for your reply.:-)

[nosonew]

I believe that sentence "the children will be available for visitation when there is an extended break in the school year" is meant to give the ncp extra time especially due to the distance.  If he doesn't have a specific holiday schedule that includes spring break, then that school break would fit into this description, etc.  

You are obviously reading the wording like you expect the bm to deny extra time.  From history or just preparing yourself?  

Read the part "will be available" does not specify that bm can pick and choose.  It doesn't say "may be availble", it is more specific, so you need to get a copy of their school calendar from the school they attend. Knowledge is power as they say.

If you haven't filed anything in Texas yet, where would you send it?  I would send it to NJ and keep a file for yourself to give the Texas court upon filing there after the year is up.  

Good luck.

[Step Mom]

Thank you oh so much for your reply!!  I thought that is what "available" meant and I hope that you are right.

The bm has already stated that "she only has to make them available during part of the time if she chooses" and has denied us all of Christmas 2002, 6 days of Christmas 2003 (including Christmas day of course), and then told my husband that she had plans for Easter.  He stood up to her about Easter and asked if she would give us the extra time in the summer to make up and she reluctantly said that he could have Easter week if he picked up and returned the children.  We will be submitting our first letter of "Intent to Excercise Visitation" for this one.  We have picked up and returned the children on two occasions now out of three because she has my husband reluctant to go through all the court hardships.  I am afraid she will just get worse as time passes and they are only 9 (daughter) and 11 (son).  He has been to court with her before over visitation issues when they lived in the same city in New Jersey, but this is a different ball game and he said the most the court did before was make her take parenting classes.  I told him that he could motion for contempt at some point I thought.  That is why we are trying to start a good and consistant documentation system now that we are seeing a definate pattern of denial.  We still need a lawyer if you know of a good one that can practice in Weslaco Texas?  and any other advice or reference would be oh so appreciated.:7

Thank you, thank you again.

-Lin

[Peanutsdad]

In order to send the letters to Texas, you first must have a case number for the court to reference, otherwise, they'll simply toss em in the trash.

If the visitation isnt spelled out about the breaks,, its unfortunately, moms discretion. What nimrod attrny told him to agree to that???

[Step Mom]

deep breath*...okay...if it is indeed at the mercy of the mother, would it be silly to send the letter of Intent and denial stating claim to the entire breaks as if we assumed the whole time belonged to us or would we be laughed out of the courtroom?

Thank you for your reply.  It is very helpful to know that we only must send to NJ and get a copy of that file to submit to Texas when we are ready to motion.

Any suggestions on finding a good but reasonable attorney?...how does one filter for a good one?  Anyone know of one in Weslaco, TX or can practice there?

Thank you so much,

-Lin

[Rakkasan]

Go ahead and file a contempt motion or a motion to enforce now in the state of New Jersey...Texas cannot take jurisdiction while a motion is pending in another state. As part of your motion ask the court to specify consequences for her failure to comply.

[Peanutsdad]

Jeez,

Thats way the heck down in south texas,, damn near as far south as you can get.

I suggest posting your case and particulars in legalmatch.com

[Peanutsdad]

One other thing,,

Since it sounds like he got himself a horrible set of orders,, ie,, sounds like things arent spelled out very well, he may want to go back to court to "tighten" up how things are ordered,, ESPECIALLY in light of his ex making visitation hard.


btw, how you filter good attrnys,, listen to what they say,, if it sounds like they are rarin to file a mod,, are moderately expensive,, likely, they will do you a good job. If they SOUND competent,, odds are,, they are.

Last thing in the world you want at this point, is an attrny who takes your retainer,, and does nothing. One I spoke to,, actually had the nerve to say,, ok Mr Peanutsdad, you pay me a 4k retainer and we'll see what happens. sure thing,, you bet, boy howdy I couldnt WAIT to have him take my hard earned cash......NOT!!!