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negotiations

Started by T0052SC, Oct 15, 2004, 08:51:47 AM

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T0052SC

I am having prblems deciding on what to do about negotiations.  My attorney is recomending coming up with a sitpulation for my STBX but I am not sure about doing this.  My attorney says this is the best way to handle it because a fight in court will deminish any co-parenting possiblity for some time because of the resentment it can cause.  He says the court room will get nasty.

I am having a couple of problems with this.
1.  My STBX and her attorney are not acting as if they are even reseptive to negotiation.  That they will only except their way or no way (their way is sole custody with a retraining order so I can not communicate or see my kids).  Right now the temporary order is a 50/50 split.  I don't know if it is worth the time, money, or agrevation to develop a stipulation to then just have them tell me to pound sand.  Also I am woried that a negotiation would be used against me in court because I am going for primary physical with joint legal.

2.  It seems like most of the important things to me in the stipulation I would have to sacrifice to make it appealing for her to agree upon.  My attorney recommens to let the kids attend her school district where she currently lives in but specify the district and not have one parent with domicile.  The problem I have is that she has already tried to get the kids to call her new lover daddy and almost moved in with him (which is in a different town and this would explain why the STBX put my son in a private school agaist my will instead of a public school).  I know as soon as this is over she will try to move in with him and try to move the kids school district and we will be right back in court.

I am unsure of what to do.  Part of me says to fight to the end and the other part says do this as noninvasive as possible.  The GAL came out recommending a 50/50 split but if we go to court can that be turned down agaist me.  I would be ok with his recommendation with an adjustment, the kids attend public school in my district and changing how the week is split so I can spend more time with them during the school week to make sure their school work is done (as of now my STBX does not help my son with school work and he doesn't hand it in).  I am just unsure of the possiblity, if I do go all the way would I be able to walk out of court with at least the GAL recomendation or altered as I stated above or at best primary physical with joint legal.

Any input you could give to help me make a decision would be greatly apriciated.  Thank you.

T0052SC

I am having prblems deciding on what to do about negotiations.  My attorney is recomending coming up with a sitpulation for my STBX but I am not sure about doing this.  My attorney says this is the best way to handle it because a fight in court will deminish any co-parenting possiblity for some time because of the resentment it can cause.  He says the court room will get nasty.

I am having a couple of problems with this.
1.  My STBX and her attorney are not acting as if they are even reseptive to negotiation.  That they will only except their way or no way (their way is sole custody with a retraining order so I can not communicate or see my kids).  Right now the temporary order is a 50/50 split.  I don't know if it is worth the time, money, or agrevation to develop a stipulation to then just have them tell me to pound sand.  Also I am woried that a negotiation would be used against me in court because I am going for primary physical with joint legal.

2.  It seems like most of the important things to me in the stipulation I would have to sacrifice to make it appealing for her to agree upon.  My attorney recommens to let the kids attend her school district where she currently lives in but specify the district and not have one parent with domicile.  The problem I have is that she has already tried to get the kids to call her new lover daddy and almost moved in with him (which is in a different town and this would explain why the STBX put my son in a private school agaist my will instead of a public school).  I know as soon as this is over she will try to move in with him and try to move the kids school district and we will be right back in court.

I am unsure of what to do.  Part of me says to fight to the end and the other part says do this as noninvasive as possible.  The GAL came out recommending a 50/50 split but if we go to court can that be turned down agaist me.  I would be ok with his recommendation with an adjustment, the kids attend public school in my district and changing how the week is split so I can spend more time with them during the school week to make sure their school work is done (as of now my STBX does not help my son with school work and he doesn't hand it in).  I am just unsure of the possiblity, if I do go all the way would I be able to walk out of court with at least the GAL recomendation or altered as I stated above or at best primary physical with joint legal.

Any input you could give to help me make a decision would be greatly apriciated.  Thank you.