Relinquishment of Parental Rights

[kathy]

I have to agree w/ janm on this, there are guidelines to follow in order to relinquish your rights. I will plan to adopt my sd once my husband gets custody of her. But my questions is if the biomom is not working and in the future my husband decides to get child support where will that money come from if she refuses to work?

I guess this serves as a lesson to all about having children, it's the kids who deal w/ all this BS. Thanks all for your opinions.

[Kitty C.]

There's TWO separate issues here:  Rights and Responsibilities.  If a parent gives up their 'rights' to a child, it means they can no longer see them or make any decisions in regards to their care.  Physically, they are cut off.  But it does NOT automatically remove their 'financial 'responsibility' to that child.  Only if a step-parent steps up to assume that responsibility (adoption)  is that 'responsibility' taken away, also.

Class is in session........INDY!..........Pay ATTENTION!!!  ;)

[kathy]

What if an adoption takes place but the bio parent decides to remain in contact w/ the child? What if a step-parent wants to adopt the step child but one of the bio parents refuses?

[kiddosmom]

A child cannot be adopted unless one of the bio- parents is absent.
via terminated rights or death.

[janM]

My son's exgf gave him custody of their son. At the time, they both agreed to no child support. She told him she would help out but never did, so a year ago he filed for support.

Long story short, she was just found in contempt for non payment. She did have a doctor's note for 3 months while she was pregnant with her now husband's baby (who now lives with the dad's mother, but I digress) but it didn't stop the arrears. She has worked a couple of times but not for long. She has been ordered to participate in a work program until she finds a job. And if she is unemployed in future, she is to report back to the program. This is in effect until the boy (who is 5) turns 18 and her arrears is paid. If she doesn't cooperate she goes to jail.

Check with child support enforcement in your county to see if they have similar programs.

Good luck to your hubby.

[kathy]

I know we have talked about relinquishing parental rights, but let's say I had problems w/ my husband and we decided to get divorced. If my step-child decides to live w/ me but both bioparents don't agree? Do I have any rights if I have been a part of my step-childs life for let's say 10 years and she's now 14??

[janM]

Unfortunately step parents have no rights to the stepkids. Even with long-term relationships. Some states may let you petition the court for visitation if there is an especially strong bond, but not sure about that. Even then, the bio parents would probably have the final say in who can spend time with them (same as grandparents). Sorry.

[Indigo Mom]

-----Indy...think about it...
If all you had to do to get out of paying child support was to terminate your rights, there would be a flood of folks to the courthouses and a whole lot of kids without the other parent in their lives.-----

Ok, I thought about it.  What's the problem?  If a person is THAT stupid, that they would willingly give up the right to parent their own flesh and blood JUST to get out of child support....I say...bubye!  Have a nice life...adios....don't let the door hit ya in the a** on the way out.  What kind of a parent would do that just to get out of child support anyway?  A dork who doesn't "really" want to be a parent...and when one doens't "want" to be a parent, they're not going to make a very good one, now are they?

-----From the states' point of view...someone has to support the kids rather than the state...just watch your taxes rise...and then there's the money they get for support collected.-----

Clearly, the state is stupid if they think it is a financial impossibility for ONE person to raise their children.  I did it on $6.50 an hour when lil dude was a baby.  Wasn't easy, we didn't have any "extras"...but we did have everything he and I both needed.  (and no one can demand I give more than that) Just because a parent wants to leave, doesn't mean the remaining parent is going to get the state to support the child.  That's too stupid for words!  

So, that brings us back to the "real" reason...the state believes our children are paychecks.  init grand?  Why would the state want to lose out on all that money, eh?  money grubbin' boneheads!

PS...could you tell kitty that if she yells at me again, I'll sock her upside the head?  thanks....  ;)

[Indigo Mom]

-----What if an adoption takes place but the bio parent decides to remain in contact w/ the child? -----

You do what you FEEL is right.  If a step parent adopts said child...that parent becomes the legal mom/dad to the child.  

HOWEVER....my hub will be my sons legal father this year. (we had a stick in our wheel last month when he was supposed to be "determined" to be my sons legal father) He has a biological father who kinda sorta...well, he left again.  He wasn't around the first 6 years, came around and was a great dad for a year, then left again when his girlfriend left him.  So, when he calls...and I know he will...he is ALWAYS welcome to pick up lil dude.  ALWAYS.  He won't be the legal father...but he will forever be a part of lil dudes life...should he choose to.  Don't ask me "why" I feel this way...I just do, and so does hub.

You don't have to do this...but it should be something you discuss before an adoption takes place.  

[Kitty C.]

I didn't realize I was that loud, LOL!