Come on now!!!

[MixedBag]

Everything that is sent to the court must be sent to opposing party...

[bloom6372]

Thanks guys!!! I do appreciate all the help! I will get working on typing the notice tomorrow (it's almost 10pm here), and will have DH fax it in and also mail it to BM. He already sent a letter detailing the situaiton to the FOC, but I think having it put in the file would be a good idea, too. The judge doesn't see anything through the FOC unless we (or the FOC) provides it as an exhibit or the judge is signing a recommendation from the FOC.

Mixedbag--I'm glad to know DH can do that. But my parents don't have the additional $4100 to buy separate tickets, and there's no way they'd get awarded any money soon (Court takes about 2-3 months to get in. The FOC gives 21 days for the violating party to reply to them in writing about the situation before any motions are submitted). So, pretty much, if BM doesn't put SD on the plane, we're not getting her for the summer (we don't have the $2000 to send DH there and back, and the additional $800 for SD's ticket, plus the $2800 to take her back at the end of the summer)...Of course DH will file for a Show Cause...

BM has already started backing down, sort of. She told DH if he gets SD at 7am from her on the 17th, then she has to be back by 7am on the day DH's parenting time ends....She's claiming that the CO states a 6pm time because when she tried to prevent his visitation for 3 years, the judge allowed her to pick SD up from SMIL (who was watching SD for the hearing on June 18) and ordered that SD would be back to DH by 6pm on June 19. So, apparently, to her, SD's pick-up times are ALWAYS 6pm, even though a it SPECIFICALLY stated June 19, 2009 for the 6pm pick up.

[ocean]

Just stay firm and maybe even leak out how much the tickets are and what figure you will be asking if she denies the visit. Might put things into persepctive for her.
Ex,
As you know the tickets were bought on XX and her flights can not be changed. As court ordered, we will pick her up at XX and her return flight is at XX. You can pick her up from the airport or XX will drive her to you. If you deny this court ordered visit, I will file contempt of court papers and ask for XX amount for tickets plus make-up time. XX needs both of us in her life. This is a great opportunity for her to see another part of the world as next year I should be back in the US. We are all looking forward to seeing SD and she will call/skype/email you while she is here.
You

[bloom6372]

Just stay firm and maybe even leak out how much the tickets are and what figure you will be asking if she denies the visit. Might put things into persepctive for her.
Ex,
As you know the tickets were bought on XX and her flights can not be changed. As court ordered, we will pick her up at XX and her return flight is at XX. You can pick her up from the airport or XX will drive her to you. If you deny this court ordered visit, I will file contempt of court papers and ask for XX amount for tickets plus make-up time. XX needs both of us in her life. This is a great opportunity for her to see another part of the world as next year I should be back in the US. We are all looking forward to seeing SD and she will call/skype/email you while she is here.
You

This is what DH emailed to her (the ticket info he has, what he will do if she denies, etc)... To all FIVE of her emails about it. She has to do ZERO transportation, so it's not like he's inconviencing her. She just wants to be in control of something, because we were proactive and prevented her from claiming we were in a dangerous/hostile country (the tsunami/earthquake was over 1500 miles away, and the base protection went to Bravo on all military bases after Bin Laden was killed, so when we mailed his notice of intent, he sent proof that we had no effects of the natural disaster in mainland and that the protection level went up worldwide, so it's not hostile here).

[bloom6372]

So, as an update...

DH did send a fax to the FOC a few days ago. He also sent a NOTICE TO THE COURT today via fax (and mailed it to BM). BM apparently contacted the FOC yesterday. Tonight (our time, Wednesday morning in the US), DH gets this email... We are so doing the happy dance! It was emailed to BM and CCed to DH for his records (he asked that he be CCed on any response to BM on this topic).

This is in response to your question about a specific time for the Father's summer parenting time to begin, the primary issue being you believe it is at 6pm and the Father believes the time is undesignated.

Pursuant to the Court's Order dated February 20, 2009, it defines the Father's summer parenting time as "from the Friday before Father's Day until August 11^th each and every year."  Specific times are not defined.

In a subsequent Order dated June 2009, it does read that the Father's summer parenting time "shall commence at 6 p.m. on Friday, June 19, 2009."  This time and date was specific for summer 2009.

The spirit of the order would be that Father's parenting time begins at some point on the Friday before Father's day and concludes on August 11.  Obviously, due to the distance involved and the air travel, it is important for the two of you to be flexible when arranging pick up and drop off times.  In the event there is not a smooth transition at the parenting time exchange and the matter is brought before this Court, it would be my recommendation that the Court strongly consider assessing court fines to the offending party.

Regards,
FOC CASE MANAGER

[Kitty C.]

WOW!!!!!!!!!!!  Way to go, bloom and DH!!!!!!  My favorite part is the very last sentence:  'In the event there is not a smooth transition at the parenting time exchange and the matter is brought before this Court, it would be my recommendation that the Court strongly consider assessing court fines to the offending party.'  Since this is coming directly from the FOC, do you think that the BM will finally heed it?  To be on the safe side, I would strongly recommend that the g-parents have a copy of this in hand when they go to pick up the child...in case they have to show it to a cop, if you know what I mean...

One other concern....are the ONLY notifying her via e-mail, or are they going to back that up with something more concrete?  And will this notice become a permanent part of the file?  Just looking at ways the BM might try to weasel her way out....'I didn't receive the e-mail' or 'It must have been inadvertantly deleted' or 'I didn't receive anything official in the mail' or 'I wasn't served' or.........you get the picture.

I still can't believe it....you guys must be pinching yourselves!  I am SO happy for you!  This is exactly what you needed and the FOC actually came through and in time, too.  Obviously they based this on the BM's previous track record of denials and other BS.  I especially like how they addressed it directly to HER, not as a general notation to you both...because it puts her on notice that SHE is the one who's causing the problems and will be in more doo-doo if she keeps it up.

Keep us informed, bloom!  I can't wait for your post to say that she is there with you!

[bloom6372]

WOW!!!!!!!!!!!  Way to go, bloom and DH!!!!!!  My favorite part is the very last sentence:  'In the event there is not a smooth transition at the parenting time exchange and the matter is brought before this Court, it would be my recommendation that the Court strongly consider assessing court fines to the offending party.'  Since this is coming directly from the FOC, do you think that the BM will finally heed it?  To be on the safe side, I would strongly recommend that the g-parents have a copy of this in hand when they go to pick up the child...in case they have to show it to a cop, if you know what I mean...

One other concern....are the ONLY notifying her via e-mail, or are they going to back that up with something more concrete?  And will this notice become a permanent part of the file?  Just looking at ways the BM might try to weasel her way out....'I didn't receive the e-mail' or 'It must have been inadvertantly deleted' or 'I didn't receive anything official in the mail' or 'I wasn't served' or.........you get the picture.

I still can't believe it....you guys must be pinching yourselves!  I am SO happy for you!  This is exactly what you needed and the FOC actually came through and in time, too.  Obviously they based this on the BM's previous track record of denials and other BS.  I especially like how they addressed it directly to HER, not as a general notation to you both...because it puts her on notice that SHE is the one who's causing the problems and will be in more doo-doo if she keeps it up.

Keep us informed, bloom!  I can't wait for your post to say that she is there with you!

They always email and follow up with a letter when it's correspondence (actual court paperwork they do only via USPS), so she can't claim she didn't get it. I am SO GLAD she got to this so quickly. The last time we had an issue, it took three weeks. If it had taken that long, BM might still play her game. She won't go against this, and we know this, because she KNOWS we have over 72 violations on her and that DH will HAPPILY submit those along with one for the missed visitation if she doesn't comply. We are hoping to use all of these emails (this is the 3rd, I believe, of her trying to deny DH's time), when he fights for primary custody when he returns to the States (along with the violations, refusal to allow proper medical care that is recommended by SD's primary care doctors and her teachers, not providing routine care for SD--DH has had to do it. ALL of the appointments in the last 2 years have been because DH set them and took SD, DH set them on MIL's EOWE, or they are related to the ADHD that DH had to have Court Ordered to follow treatment for, etc etc etc).

As for sending a copy to relatives, yup, we are ON that. lol. We also are sending copies of the COs, a copy of the notice letter we sent BM, POA's for traveling with SD, and copy of DH's orders (we are sending one to MIL, and 3 to my parents--one for my mom, and one to hand to BM and the police if she tries anything. lol).

We are definitely excited.

[Kitty C.]

Got your i's dotted and your t's crossed!  I'm not going to jinx it by stating something that will be happening in the future, but definitely let us know how things urn out!

Remember....you have two and a half weeks to wait yet...hope you can stand the suspense!

Doin' the happy dance with ya!