Civil rights or Human rights protection group in San Jose, CA

[sjequality]

I am not sure whether San Jose, California has any Civil rights or Human Rights group to help protect a father of a child.

On our CSC Statement, I proposed:

- Respect the laws, United State Amendments, Universal Declaration of Human Rights and advocate the equal shared parenting.
- Whereas, Mother and Father under section 3010, are equally entitled to the custody of the child.
- Everyone has the right to autonomy, freedom, universal principles of justice which are self-chosen with a free will.
- Son, Mother and Father have the rights to live life in peace, freedom, without the court order and intervention.
- Father is not sure whether the court system can be as neutral witness to equal shared parenting plan without issuing the court order. If is is impossible, Mother and Father can have the opportunity to develop a fair agreement outside the court from a preselected neutral mediator.
- Dismiss the case without prejudice.


When I said whatever it was, true and false, good and bad, please respect the laws and equality. Sudden anger, the judge instructed some police officers to use handcuffs and threatened to put the father into jail, escorted out of the court room, then gave order so I would be as supervised parent, 2 visits per week with father for 1 1/2 hours.

What is going on? Where are the justice, equality, liberty?

Please help.

[ocean]

Something happened for you to get supervised visits..... not following your statements but:
1. If the parents can make a schedule on their own, no need for court order.
2. One side in your case did not agree, so someone filed in court to get the courts to set an order.
3. Family court sides with mother usually for primary parent unless you have significant evidence on why 50/50 would work or neglect/abuse for more than 50/50.
4. Supervised visits are not given lightly....so there is more to your story...if you want help, then give us all the facts.
5. Now that you have supervised, you need to play their game. Show up at every visit, have fun with your child, take pics at visits. Ask for extra time after a while. Do you have another court date set up? If so, follow the visitation plans, do not communicate to mother unless it is an emergency with child and do it in a text or tape phone call to protect yourself. Follow the plan until the next court date, and ask for the supervised to be lifted. Keep your cool in court.

[sjequality]

- The mother of the child disagrees recommended order (50/50) from the evaluator and wants to have more than 50%.
- It seems like I disobeyed the Judge's authority commands "sit down" twice, I don't know why and how at that time I just simply stood there and smiled without prejudice. He said that I had misconduct problem and others (I don't remember the details).
- Can I ask for extra time after a while from the mother or judge?

[ocean]

New court order was made recently giving you supervised visits? Was this a final order?
Do you have another court date coming up?

Start doing every visit in the new court order. Let it be for a few weeks. You will be in front of same judge for next date/hearing probably so.... If you have new date already, then ask for more time. If you do not have another court date scheduled, you will have to file modification of visitation papers to increase the time.

Depending on the current order and relationship with mom, you can ask for more time through her too. Be careful right now, just follow current court order. Ask for extra time in writing or follow up in email/text about what was said. If she says no. Leave it alone. You do not want harassment charges on you next...

[sjequality]

It is a temporary supervised visits, the evaluator has not let us know the next court date yet.

Thank you for your help.

[ocean]

Ok, that is better. Many people do not get any visitation until the final hearing so this was put in place so you get to see your child. Your actions in the court room, got you the supervised. As long as you keep your cool, you should be able to lift the supervised and add time. Sign up for a parenting class and start it, take CPR class, and if child is school age, have contact with school/teacher. Ask for all notes that go home. If child is in activities, you can go watch the activity unless it is court ordered you are not allowed there. Watch child, wave goodbye and leave. Good luck!

[MixedBag]

"It seems like I disobeyed the Judge's authority commands "sit down" twice, I don't know why and how at that time I just simply stood there and smiled without prejudice. He said that I had misconduct problem and others (I don't remember the details)."

Oh.....this....

Smiled?  You REALLY gotta watch your facial expressions in court -- Yep, I made that mistake and I think it was an eye roll that caused me to get my butt chewed.  Truthfully?  I didn't even REALIZE that I did it!  The situation deserved it -- and it was on video that I saw later, but when he called me on it -- I was thinking "Woa!" and after that had to REALLY focus on keeping a neutral face EVEN when my EX really really really got his butt chewed.  You know how much I wanted to kick back and smile!....couldn't.  Couldn't show an OUNCE of glee.
Just my personal experience -- a mistake I made in court when representing myself.

[sjequality]

We go back to court next Monday. I don't have experience and not sure what to ask the judge if he is able to lift the supervised visits and go back to 50/50. The current order is clearly detrimental to the child.

[ocean]

Maybe apologize to judge and say something like "I am sorry for my behavior last hearing, my relationship with my child is very important to me, and going from 50/50 to supervised in not in the best interest of xxx(name child). I am asking the courts to reconsider the temp visitation plan so that xx and I can continue the relationship we had before last weeks hearing. I have signed up for a parenting classes through xx company and will do anything it takes to that my relationship with my child stays in tact".  See where it goes...good luck!

[Scotgirl]

Who is your judge? In SJ CA this makes a huge difference. To have the supervised visitation lifted, ask for an emergency screening with family court services. IF they believe that it is still required after a brief investigation. A judge imposing this just for misbehavior in court seems unlikely(unless he held you in contempt)..But there are miscarriages of justice(my ADA was violated by a family court judge). There is the Center for Judicial Excellence in Marin County who look into these problems.

Good Luck

[sjequality]

Thanks for your help.

The supervised visitation is lifted, but the judge wants to make another temp order which I have 2 or 3 weekends per month, and some hours in the weekday while I take the Anger Management class. It seems unreasonable to take our child away from his father during this critical time. Is it possible that it may lead to "established custodial environment with the mother" after 3 months? (The child is about 2 years old). I may be wrong.

I am unsure if I have to follow the judge current order or file a motion to ask for 50/50. What can I do?

Thank you

[ocean]

If judge ordered temp visitation order, there should be another court date assigned. Get into a class ASAP, finish class, go to next court date with proof you finished and ask for more time. If no future court date, then you would file to modify the visitation as you finished class and want to increase the time. Sounds like judge gave you  the standard visitation plan (every other weekend, and few hours during week for dinner visit/after work visit).

[sjequality]

What does it mean when the court order says "Current order dated xx/xx/xx to remain in effect until first week of April 2014."?

Will the current order be lifted on 04/01/14 or after 04/06/2014?

Thank you

[ocean]

Do you have another court date already? Sounds like until the next court date or when the judge thinks you should be in again?  First week in April, to me would be until April 5th as that is the end of the first week in April, up to interpretation though. Need new court order to continue...

[sjequality]

Hi.

Last Friday, I were able to get 50/50 timeshare again.The judge made it clear that the new order would commence immediately.  At that time, the judge was not able to prepare the court order, he said it would be mailed to us.

The court order is that father will have Mondays and Tuesdays and every-other weekend as 2-2-3 time schedule.

The mother refuses to let father to pick up the child as the "will be mailed" court order on last Friday. She used previous court order and said that I violated that court order if I insisted to pick up the child this morning.

What can I do to avoid the conflict and not violating the current order? As my understanding, the current order may take up to weeks or months to be mailed.


Thanks for your help. I truly appreciate your time and effort.

[ocean]

Ugg....first send her this text or email

"As per our last court hearing on xx, the judge clearly told both of us that the new orders were effectively immediately and that we would be mailed the orders shortly. I am supposed to have xx starting xx. Please let me know when xx is available for the exchange so the new schedule starts as the judge ordered. If I do not hear back to you within 24 hours, I will be forced to file contempt of court for not following the orders that were clearly given to both of us at the hearing. Thank you"

Then call the clerk, and politely tell them (the short version) and if it at all possible can you pick up the papers as soon as they are ready as child is not being allowed to come as mother wants the orders in writing.

You prob will not be fill out contempt papers as you will get the order, faster than you get another hearing...unless you go for emergency hearing as mother is not following new 50/50 timeshare and child is not with you this week as court ordered. (Not sure if a judge will hear it on an emergency hearing). Judge will not be happy to see her again.

Is child in in daycare? Can you pick child up on your days from there? Go and get child on new days, if mom wont allow child to be there, police can write a report (they wont enforce even if you had court papers but a report will prove to judge you tried to get child if it goes to court).

Good luck!

[MixedBag]

I agree with Ocean -- kinda a gray period of time....between what's verbally ordered in court and what will get written and signed.

I almost found myself in that position a few years ago -- but the judge understood the "urgency" of the matter and I left the court with a signed order.  Then dad basically took the same stance -- old order stands until a new order is signed -- and FORTUNATELY I sent son back in the house with a copy of the newly signed order.  (Would have loved to be a fly on the wall at that time....)  For me, it was a change in custody over to me and school was starting that day, so hence the need for a signed order all on the same day.

Good luck!  Stay calm, and yep, bug the clerk.

BTW -- there have been situations -- to include my own from different hearings -- where I thought I heard ONE thing in court, and when I reviewed the video, the judge said something slightly different.  Nerves....kinda play mind games in the head many times too -- and other parents have too vented that what was said in court DIDN'T make it into the order.