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refuses to set a visitation plan

Started by dada2fish, Aug 16, 2015, 10:38:37 AM

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dada2fish

My son's father refuses to work with me to make a visitation schedule. He refuses to tell me his work schedule at his new job he started 6 months ago.

My son looks forward to time spent with his dad and I have cancelled my own plans or changed my schedule at times so my son can see him.

This separation has been difficult for my son and he has witnessed arguments and tension solely because I'm left hanging day by day on whether dad is working or not and if he will spend time with our son.

I've spent this past summer unable to make any significant plans because of everything being "up in the air" with Dad's schedule.

Part of me thinks my ex is being vague with his schedule so it will be nearly impossible for me to plan a social life of my own since the only timely my son is not with me is when he's with his dad.

After yet another argument about visitation he tells me that he is "on call" on this job. He never knows day to day when, if and how long he is working. This is the first I've heard of this "on call" status and I'm not sure I believe it.

I have not yet file for child support, but I plan to in the next couple weeks since my ex has never paid financially for our son's care since day one. My son has always lived in my home(s) and I've financially provided for him 99% of the time.

I've heard that I can request mediation through the courts to come up with a documented and agreed upon visitation schedule. Is his "on call" schedule something the court would expect me to work around or is that considered unreasonable by parenting standards?

Is it unrealistic to expect to hold down an "on call" job while trying to co-parent?

It's causing undo stress with me and especially my son. Whenever he asks when can he see his dad, I can never give him a specific answer. Many times we are home waiting for Dad's planned phone call or pickup and it never comes,because he "ended up working later than he thought."

I don't want to put his job in jeopardy, but I'm calling BS on his crazy schedule. Am I being unreasonable and should I just be happy he's FINALLY working a job or is he being unreasonable with refusing to come up with some consistency in our son's life when it comes to visitation?
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