how to change visitation to be more specific

[frustratedfamily]

A little background, dh and his ex were divorced in TX, custody, visitations and child support were all part of their divorce order.  DH now lives in PA and ex lives in MN.  TX says they can no longer modify any agreement because they don't have jurisdiction.  How do we get this modified.  
The original agreement was not very specific.  Currently he gets:
every other weekend,
every spring break
even year thanksgiving
even year, from the day after school is out until the day after Christmas
off year from the day after Christmas until the day before school starts
45 days in the summer

We don't do the weekends, spring break or thanksgiving.  Basically we have her Christmas and the summer.

it is about 900 miles so we fly her and can only afford that 2 times a year.

the only real changes we want to make is that we get spring break every other year, keep Christmas as it is, specify specific dates for the summer and have her pay a portion of the ticket.  Also we want it specified that she must fly on a direct, non stop flight.  

Thanks
Dawn

[beststepmomever]

Gosh, I wish I could be more helpful but I know the first thing you have to do is Request a change of juristiction... I know my husbands ex had this done a while back. Your county's clerk of the court should be able to get you the right paperwork.

[stepma]

If the child has lived in MN for at least 6 months you have to file everything there.

[Sherry1]

in the staet where the children reside.  Down side to this is that they will enter it as a new filing in the new state so you will have to redo child support, etc.  If it were me, I would use an on-line child support calculator for the new state and start plugging in some numbers to see if your child support will go up dramatically.  If child support were going to go up dramatically you might want to reconsider things.  Most states of do it yourself filing packages.

Here is a link to a Minnesota site.  Child support looks nasty because they only factor in the NCP's income, and the NCP pays a portion of his income for CS.  If the main thing you are trying to do is get he pay a portion of the airfare, I would sure check out first if CS is going to go way up and then make a price of a ticket null and void.  Sometimes opening a can of worms by moving jurisdiction can serious go against an NCP especially if child support hasn't been adjusted in a long time.

http://www.divorcenet.com/states/minnesota

[fairness]

Would she agree to a stipulated order? IF they get alone perhaps the details could be ironed out in a few emails back and forth and you have an attorney file in county where the children have lived for past 6 months, you first need to request change of venue from Texas but you might be able to file that and appear there by yourself. The change of venue is pretty straight forward- unless she objects.
I think you are best offering her some carrot in front to agree to these things. She's not going to agree to pay for airplane flights if she never did before and if you moved...
Common sense would say she will agree to one way flights - most airlines won't allow a child under 12 on stop over flights and it really makes sense- you wouldn't want your children wandering in an airport to find a gate and getting lost or worse.

Since you are asking for less time perhaps she would agree.
The stipulation route avoids filing income and expense forms for now but not forever

[frustratedfamily]

She would never agree to anything.  Moving it to MN she would be ok with because she knows how much child support she will get, she is already collecting from someone else in MN on her last child but know she will fight paying any of the tickets   We have never actually asked her to pay for a portion of the ticket but once we somehow missed the unaccompanied minor fee and she had to pay it, $40, she threw a major fit and insisted my DH send her the money back.  She will also fight the direct flight, she wants her to fly out of the airport that is 1 hour away and has no direct flights instead of the big airport that is 1.5 hours away and does, because it is easier on her, she does not really care how it is for SD it seems.  Also, we don't want the child support moved to MN under any circumstances, she is to good at working that system.  If it is to be moved we want it to move to PA.
My understanding is since both parties have left the state of TX they no longer have jurisdiction, MN has no jurisdiction over DH, he has never even been to the state, so they can't without his permission issue a new child support order, they do have jurisdiction of SD though so could issue a new custody order, does that make since?

[jilly]

"MN has no jurisdiction over DH, he has never even been to the state, so they can't without his permission issue a new child support order..."


This statement is somewhat incorrect.  You are right that MN has no jurisdiction over your DH because he doesn't live there.  HOWEVER, the original jurisdiction was TX.  Both parties now live in separate States.  All your DH's ex has to do is go to the courthouse or to the child support office and get the TX child support order transferred to MN.  MN would take jurisdiction because that's where the child resides.  Now. your DH could try to fight it and refuse to give MN jurisdiction over him but is that a fight he wants to have?  Cause in the end he'll come out a big loser.  Big Brother always gets his money.

[skye]

1. It does not matter where your DH lives it matters where the children live..have they resided there for more then 6 months? ( MN)






2. Airtran is the cheapest airline there is and the safest for children in my very honest opinion, my children fly with them often. They have service in St paul MN and also in Pitsburg and Philly PA .


http://tickets.airtran.com/skylights/cgi-bin/skylights.cgi

[MixedBag]

The TX order has to get transferred to MN because that's where the children live and if parenting time is to be modified, then MN will have to have the hearings and stuff to do it.

As for Child Support, I've been told that it really depends on WHO asks for the modification.  If Mom asks, they go to Dad's state and use the calculators where Dad lives, not where mom lives.  If Dad asks, they go to the state where mom lives, not where dad lives.

Think about it -- if Mom moves to NY (high cost of living), and Dad moves to WV (lower cost of living), it's not really right for NY to set CS on their standards because dad's not there working.  So NY goes to WV, gets cs set based on WV and then dad pays through the system back to mom.  CP's are not allowed to "move" and shop around for a state where they will get more money out of the NCP due to THEIR/CP's high cost of living.

So to keep CS out of MN, dad needs to be still on the subject.

That's what happened to DH.  He filed a motion to show cause in NV and at the same time NV adjusted child support.  He lives in AL.  Original decree was in OH and both parties moved away.  Jurisdiction for contempts followed the children....which was NV.