custody

[the1fordirt]

 I guess my conception of the court system was wrong. I thought the courts were there to seek the truth and serve Justus
3-30-02 the petitioner left California for Nevada with out permit ion of the courts or my consent. She took our daughter and left our boys behind. The petitioner immediately denied me visitation.
8-26-02 the petitioner kept our fourteen-year-old son Bradley against his will. Enrolled him in school without filling in former school or student's father. It took me two attempts and lots of time off work to get Bradley home. I then had trouble enrolling him in school because my name was not on the school records in Nevada. After a few phone calls, I was finally able to enroll him.
The day I pick Brad up the petitioner had some nice things to say and told me I would never see my daughter again!
We did not hear from the petitioner for about two months she was mad at every one in thinking I was making the boys stay with me and said we could all just go to hell!
12-4-02 the petitioner hands me some pictures that our daughter had drawn with papers for custody hidden under neeth.
12-6-02 our eighteen-year-old son Kyle is killed in an auto accident.
A few days later the petitioner told me she was not going to fight me for custody of Brad she didn't want me to be alown.Meanwhile she was devising a plan with her sisters on how to take Brad home with her. The day of Kyle's' funeral I caught wind of this and stopped her from taking him. She ripped off in her car did not give him his close and said she would see me in court. Nice day to pull off that stunt.
1-7-03 Filed contempt papers for violating temporary restraining orders.
2-28-03 First hearing. Charges were dropped? The judge asked why I was not able to see my daughter the petitioner said my daughter was frightened of me. Not true. The judge did not even question it. Now it would be another two months to see when I could see my daughter.
I have at least six statements from the petitioner that are not hearsay taken under oath but the judge will not even open the file.
Dew to my frustration and show of anger my visitation has been limited. I have only seen my daughter about ten percent of the time. This has been going on for two and a half years with no end in sight. How do I get Justus with out digging my self a deeper hole?

[Troubledmom]

I am full of questions to be able to offer you any real advice. But if this is an ongoing court case, if you haven't taken one already, I would suggest you take an anger management class.
In my area our County Mental Health Department offers a 16 week class that gives a wide variety of anger management skills. It is not a domestic violence program or a batterer treatment program it is a self improvement one. That type of class will offer you skills to handle the anger and show the court you are willing to make postive changes to be an active part of your daughters life.
Not much in the advice catagory, but hope it helps.

TM

[darkspectre]

If everything is as you say it is, then I really feel bad for you. And believe me, given what I've been through the past three years that's saying a lot.

I can't tell you how sorry I am for the loss of your son. I can't even begin to imagine how painful that has been for you.

However, with regard to your ex, I don't really have any good answers for you. She's basically acting like an out-of-control, self-serving little bitch in a system that encourages them to act like out-of-control, self serving little bitches. Even if you could go to court with three or four witnesses who would all say that she is smoking crack in front of your daughter, unless she's been arrested for it you still aren't getting your daughter back, and you just might lose custody of your son while you're there.

I know you're miserable, but unfortunately you're going to have to come to terms with the fact that family court functions with only one goal in mind: Help women while destroying men in the process.

In the way of advice I would tell you only this . . .

You are lucky in that you at least have one of your children full-time. If you file for custody of your daughter, or to at least have reasonable visitation, in my opinion you stand the chance of losing both of your kids. The courts don't give a sh*t that she fled the state w/o permission. If you had done it they would throw your ass in jail, but they won't do a damn thing to her.

Best you can do is go talk to a good attorney and see if he/she thinks you have any viable options to pursue.

Good Luck!

[Brent]

> I guess my conception of the court system was wrong. I
>thought the courts were there to seek the truth and serve
>Justus

Nothing could be further from the truth.



>2-28-03 First hearing. Charges were dropped? The judge asked
>why I was not able to see my daughter the petitioner said my
>daughter was frightened of me. Not true. The judge did not
>even question it. Now it would be another two months to see
>when I could see my daughter.

This is a classic alienation technique, and judges are so stupid and so chickenshit that they fall for it EVERY DAMN TIME.


>I have at least six statements from the petitioner that are
>not hearsay taken under oath but the judge will not even open
>the file.

As you now know, the judges in Family court do NOT want to know the truth, nor do they give a damn. They just don't. We see it time and time again.