insurance question

[iceclimber]

am i required to provide the other parent with access to our health insurance account. the children are covered under this account secondary to insurance that is court ordered by the other parent.
it is thru bcbs federal and they cannot assure me that if i give him access that it will be limited access... meaning access to only the children's information.

the other parent says he needs this info to receive EOBs for the children. however i have a copy of every EOB and have offered to send him anything he needs.

our divorce agreement states that i am required to provide him with copies received from teachers, doctors, etc...
nothing about insurance other than he is to provide the insurance.

i only signed the children up under our insurance to save us all money since we already had family coverage.

[Ref]

that states you have to give him access? I would give him the health insurance card, the formulary info and other docs they might send you with important changes and that is it, if it just says access.

He doesn't need to see anything else.

Ref

[Kitty C.]

....if he isn't satisfied with that, tell him he can take it up with the court.  I would continue to send him copies of the EOB.  That way, if he's stupid enough to take it to court, you can show the judge that you've gone above and beyond the original CO, since it does NOT say you have to provide it to him.

[MixedBag]

Oh boy -- insurance!

I would not give an EX access to anything where they can "see" what's going on with the entire family -- like on-line access.

I noticed that you say you have offered to send him anything he needs....don't just offer, do it and send it via a method you can prove he received it.

My EX#2 was very demanding on this subject as well -- and he contacted my insurance directly who spoke with him on the phone and sent him what they deemed he needed as the custodial parent.  I signed over nothing to him-- but made sure he received EOBs.  Think I got the same in return?  Not as a NCP.

As a CP, his insurance contacted me but I don't have on-line access to anything.  That would give me too much information.

Share the EOB, share the insurance cards on the kids, and I think you'd be safe in front of a judge.

That's the person you need to keep happy -- the judge.

[iceclimber]

no. our CO says nothing about giving him access. in fact, it never contemplated that i would obtain insurance for them.

it only states:

"Entitlement to Complete Information: Each parent shall be entitled to complete and detailed information from all pediatricians, physicians, dentists, consultants, or specialists attending, treating or counseling the children, for any reason whatsoever, and to be furnished with copies of any reports given to one or the other parent. Each shall be entitled to complete and detailed information from all teachers, schools, day car facilities, summer camps or other institutions that the children may attend or become associated with in any way. Each of the parties shall be furnished with copies all reports given to the other."

"Health Insurance: The husband shall continue to maintain the medical and dental insurance on the minor children through his employment so long as it is reasonably available to him. Each party shall equally share any medical, dental, prescription, vision, orthodontic or mental health expenses for the minor children not covered by said insurance."

that is all i see....

so i will copy all EOBs and send to him via certified mail, since i haven't them via a documented method. this way there is no question he has what he needs.

which brings up the fact that i requested a copy of an EOB for DDs ortho coverage... and he refused.

[Davy]

In the great majority of cases, parents have shared parental responsibility for the care, custody and control of a child. Shared parental responsibility is a relationship where both of the parents retain full parental rights and responsibilities with respect to their children. The parties should confer and discuss on such issues as schooling, health, religion, the child's activities and any other issue regarding the welfare of the minor child. These major decisions should be made jointly after a full discussion of each of the parent's concerns.

Irregardless of the father bashing remarks by other posters it would be best for you and the children to learn to confer and defer your issues to the father rather than to gather "talking points" for the court room from an internet board.  I'm certain the judge would agree with me !!!

You can work it out !!!

[Kitty C.]

Davy, the father has already proven that he refuses to discuss these matters with the mother and also refuses to make joint decisions.  He's made it plain that it's his way or the highway.  How do you overcome an obstacle like that?

[MixedBag]

Dare I suggest...

Send the EOBs using priority confirmed delivery where you can actually print the label from home and send it off, and track it.

See--some folks have heard complaints that certified means he has to go to the post office and pick it up when he's supposed to be at work.  (Whiners will be whiners!)  

Some folks have complained that what was said to be sent, wasn't sent.

As for ortho.....go to the ortho's office and get the information you need that way.  It won't be the same EOB, BUT they'll probably share their equivalent.  Use the back door and accomplish the task at hand.  Complain to the judge on another day.

[Ref]

These guys are pros Ice. Take their advice seriously. AND in their defense (and maybe mine), I don't see any bashing going on here. Only solid advice.

Ref

[Davy]

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