Mediation

[cowboy crazy]

Dear Soc

A little background - we are in the middle of a custody case, the psychological evaluations are done and the findings are out, we were told to come to some sort of agreement but the ex refused.

The evaluator is suggesting splitting up the children due to the exterme dermination of my oldest child and due to the facts that have come out regarding the ex and her relationship with this child.  

We live in different states so that would mean splitting the children up long distance. I do not want this for many reasons.  As imagined no agreement could be reached so the trial date was scheduled for July and we have been preparing all documents and things. We find out today that mediation has been ordered by our Judge.

We all know that mediation is a total waste of time because the ex is not going to agree to give up the kids.

Not to many people would but all the odds are stacked up against her because I have an abuse case that was founded with CPS, the evaluator stated the if the oldest does not come to live with me it could be detromental to her, and the ex royally p*ssed the Judge off the last time we were in court and she called her a bad mother!  But we will still be going to take it to court because the mediation will be a waste but we have to go.

My questions are:

1.  How much does an average mediator cost?
2.  Is anything that could be agreed to in mediation legal and binding
3.  Does it look bad in court if nothing is agreed upon and it goes to court?
4.  How does mediation even work because in our case it will just be a screaming match.

[socrateaser]

>My questions are:
>
>1.  How much does an average mediator cost?

$200-300 per hour.

>2.  Is anything that could be agreed to in mediation legal and
>binding

If there is an actual agreement between the parties that occurs during mediation and the mediator is contractually permitted to report this to the court or the parties actually sign an agreement during mediation, then that agreement is binding.  

Otherwise, nothing in mediation is binding, and no evidence of what occured during mediation may be used as evidence in a subsequent legal action -- including the mediator's testimony.

>3.  Does it look bad in court if nothing is agreed upon and it
>goes to court?

Depends on the judge. Legally, it has no weight, howver, as a practical matter, if the judge thinks that one or both parties are stonewalling, then it will likely work against the party or parties being difficult.

>4.  How does mediation even work because in our case it will
>just be a screaming match.

Mediators are pretty good at keeping people under control. One way to accomplish this is to put the parties in different rooms and have the mediator go back and forth with proposals. That way, no personal conflict can take place.