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Author Topic: Issuing a show cause, but will they see what's really going on?  (Read 1819 times)

durandal

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CP, NCP and Child are in Virginia

I was given unsupervised temporary visitation for my daughter while home studies are done and the custody case is contunued until May. The visitation was for four hours on Saturdays, each week, since the child is very young.

I have tried to illustrate to the court that the CP has consistently done everything in her power to limit my access to the child, EXCEPT if it involves spending social time with the CP as well. Of course, the CP claims that is not true and tries to make it appear that she is being cooperative in all regards.

I had been receiving phone calls from the CP (on my old home number) during the first part of the week, stating that the new phone number I had given as part of the visitation agreement was not a valid number. After checking, I discovered that my roomate had mixed up two of the digits in the new number - it was a new number and she wasn't used to giving it out often, hence the mistake.

So, to rectify the situation, I called the CP, and after playing her games of 'I'm not going to let you leave a voicemail message' and 'I'm going to act like we have a bad connection when you call', I wasn't sure what to do. As I document everything, she also gave me an ultimatum stating that if i didn't provide her with a valid number, then she wasn't going to bring the child for my visitation. She even went as far as to say that I can go and tell the Judge I said that.

I corrected the mistake - and honest one, by sending her a letter with the corrected information, express mail with a return receipt upon delivery. I went to the court clerk and filed an copy of the same letter, on the same day that she received the express package. This was all completed on FRIDAY morning - her getting the letter, and the filing - one day after I found out about the mistake.

Also as we have an elderly family member living with us who has Alzheimer's, told the CP not to call past a certain hour, unless it was an emergency involving the child's health or as necessary to care for the child if the CP had an emergency. I also tried to explain to the Judge that the nature of the calls that the CP makes, if answered by the elderly woman, would cause emotional distress and maybe even place her in a dangerous situation. The CP can be very profane, and often makes up situations as she pleases to satisfy her objectives.

Question 1) Is it possible to get the Judge to place stipulations on the time and reasons the CP can call the home in this temporary visitation?

Question 2) Can I make a case during this show cause to get more visitation time? I'm petitioning for full custody, but as a very involved NCP I can provide more than four hours for my child, and my child knows me, I've been there since day one - its not like I'm coming back from being absent.

FRIDAY evening, CP started making annyoing calls again.  Started around 9PM, after I refused her offers to come by and "visit" her on two sepearte calls. She waited for a few hours - then begain calling, saying that if I was going to be a little late for the visitation pickup tomorrow that would be fine. She then called around 4 AM saying that the child had a temperature, allegedly caused by her teething, and that she needed to talk to me. She called back soon after saying that she might not be able (read willing) to bring her for visitation because of the temperature. But the CP's focus during her "emergency" was on the voicemail, and my roomate - tyring to find out as much as she could and leaving profane messages - 10 in all, over the next few hours.
 
This past Saturday would have been my second visitation, but the CP didn't bring her to the visitation as ordered. She did call several times during the day to say that I was a terrible father for not responding to the emergency, that she doesn't care about the court order, her... HER child, as she put it, was in dire straits from a teething temperature and that she wasn't going to let her go on visitation because of that. I actually did respond, I told her that if she wanted me to come by and take them to the ER, then I would do so - nevermind the fact that her roomate has a car and could have done the same - in a real emergency. All of a sudden, it just became a minor temperatire and the CP didn't want to pay for something like that - I have this on audiotape, all of it -  for the whole week.

Later Saturday afternoon, I spoke with the CP, and she seemed just fine, in fact, she wanted me to talk to the child, which means that the CP puts the phone to the child's ear and I say a few baby talk words. The fever and emergency just 'went away'.

Question 3) I'm obviously going to issue a show cause, but I've had a terrible time getting the courts to hear anything that I say, much less all the hours of audiotape recordings I have. How do I get the evidence to be heard by the Judge, or at least to get the court to see what's going on here?

All they seem to want to do is allow her to make up random lies, under oath, which throws my hard evidence, which for some reason is on the same level as her rants, into the "we don't know who's telling the truth" pile.

The audiotapes should all be fair game... some of them are voicemail messages left by the CP, others are two-way conversations which - at the outset the CP was told that they would be recorded and, in her typical defiance, actually consented to.

durandal




socrateaser

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RE: Issuing a show cause, but will they see what's really going on?
« Reply #1 on: Mar 04, 2007, 03:27:09 PM »
>Question 1) Is it possible to get the Judge to place
>stipulations on the time and reasons the CP can call the home
>in this temporary visitation?

Yes. Note: get your nomenclature straight. Judges ORDER; parties STIPULATE/AGREE.

>
>Question 2) Can I make a case during this show cause to get
>more visitation time? I'm petitioning for full custody, but as
>a very involved NCP I can provide more than four hours for my
>child, and my child knows me, I've been there since day one -
>its not like I'm coming back from being absent.

Not unless there's some substantial change in circumstances. And, I don't see any from your posted facts.

>
>Question 3) I'm obviously going to issue a show cause, but
>I've had a terrible time getting the courts to hear anything
>that I say, much less all the hours of audiotape recordings I
>have. How do I get the evidence to be heard by the Judge, or
>at least to get the court to see what's going on here?

Monitor your calls and don't answer during visitation. You're making a mountain out of a molehill. You control whether you want to answer the phone. If someone else uses the same phone a syou, then cancel your phone service, and get a cell phone, so you can control this issue.

>All they seem to want to do is allow her to make up random
>lies, under oath, which throws my hard evidence, which for
>some reason is on the same level as her rants, into the "we
>don't know who's telling the truth" pile.

If you start whining, I will stop reading.

>
>The audiotapes should all be fair game... some of them are
>voicemail messages left by the CP, others are two-way
>conversations which - at the outset the CP was told that they
>would be recorded and, in her typical defiance, actually
>consented to.

I'm sure that with the correct use of the rules of civil procedure and evidence, the audiotapes can be admitted. You're just not going to get the court's attention, because you're pro se. That's how the system works. Judges don't want to listen to pro se litigants any more than they must, because generally pro se litigants don't know what they're doing, and it's a waste of the court's time.

There are a few pro seers who manage to get their judge to cut them some slack, but for the most part it's an uphill battle. So, get used to it, or get a lawyer.

 

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