I am a step-mom to a ten year old, and we have been dealing with the programming (PAS) sicne age 4. Mother was out of the picture prior to then. But when she decided to become a parent she had a littany of cutdowns and critacisim about my husbands ability to parent.
My husband is teh most loving unconditional caring father that I know, and the bonds are still thee but we can tell where they are headed. She leads the child to believe she will catch colds in our home, and we are unable to care forher, after visits with her mom her (our) clothes are often changed, because they made her itchy or too hot, too cold– Never good enough.
The list goes on and on. Soon she will be age 12 and we know what that means. Her mother has been preparing her to get infront of the judge and say she prefers her moms house. We will be out of the picture.
Funny part is when her mother has her at her house, she is never home. She leaves her home alone or leaves her with a grandparent. It's as if it's a fight over power and nothing more. I can't help but feel she doenst really care about her daughter.
She removes handouts, teacher notes, and homework information from the bookbag, before the father picks her up for his parenting time, and tries to keep him out of the school loop. We have tried to put envelopes in the book bag to facilitate exchange of assignments. But it gets tossed. She goes out of her way to bring back the school folder she removed from teh back, to return it to the school, so the father can not get his hands on anything from her school. Grade ccards, graded homework, school pictures etc.
It's unreal.
I can do nothing about it, sicne I am only a step-parent.