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Author Topic: support enforcement help dads?  (Read 3103 times)

RJS

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support enforcement help dads?
« on: Dec 08, 2003, 08:45:04 PM »
I'm a dad who has honored my support obligation and supplemented according to my childs needs even.  The divorce assigned certain financial obligations to be split such as medical bills (although I carry insurance) and daycare costs.  These facilities will bill only one party and historically I'm it.  My ex-wife always fails to pay and is in arrears for her portion of counseling services and summer daycare for over a year.  My question is this:  if the divorce decree is the legal judgement establishing financial obligations and Support Enforcement withdraws from my account monthly to ensure I pay on time, what legal assistance do I have to extract money owed to me by my ex-wife for her decree assigned obligations?  Why should I pay an attorney to try to enforce a judgement already made?
Ideally, I should be able to submit proof of debt to Support Enforcement and have the support suspended until it covers her obligation to me.  Seems fair, right?


MKx2

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RE: support enforcement help dads?
« Reply #1 on: Dec 08, 2003, 10:56:20 PM »
Sure seems fair to me, but ... that isn't the way it works.

Of course you can get all your ducks in a row with documentation, etc. and file contempt charges for the monies she owes you.  That will only cost you filing fees (usually $25 - 50), which of course you would ask that court costs be reimbursed to you if your ex is found in contempt.

It ISN'T fair, you're right.  But the legal system being what it is, it is what has be dealt with.

RJS

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RE: support enforcement help dads?
« Reply #2 on: Dec 09, 2003, 09:38:38 AM »
Thank you!  Sounds like something I can do without lawyer assistance.  It is a start.  Right now, she flaunts the fact that I'm powerless in the situation.  My son wears last year's school clothes I purchased because of her ongoing neglect while she sports a new leather coat for the season.  I wish the system recognized some mothers don't deserve the title.

hisliltulip

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RE: Agreed
« Reply #3 on: Dec 09, 2003, 12:06:43 PM »
"I wish the system recognized some mothers don't deserve the title"...




I find it amazing that you have to attend a class and take a test to operate a motor vehicle.

But anyone can be a parent because they either figured out how to open their legs or found a hole and aimed correctly!

I take great pride in being a Mother and Step-Mother, it's the most important job I'll ever have.


Hang in there and be happy that your son doesn't show up in girl clothes from the seventies.  My yss has been known to.

If money is tight for you right now, look around for a second hand children's store.  Some are better than others, so it would take some checking into.  I finally found one that carries a lot of gently worn or never worn clothing (and shoes, and boots, and jackets, etc.) that helps stretch the clothing budget through the year for our three boys.  Just a suggestion.


Beth

KAT

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RE: Agreed
« Reply #4 on: Dec 10, 2003, 08:15:57 AM »
Are you the one taking the child into the doctors? If not, then did you sign any forms guaranteeing payment & requesting treatment? If the answer is no, then they can not legally bill you (mail fraud). If she signed the forms with your name then it is forgery and she can be criminally charged, plain & simple. You can write a certified letter to the doctor requesting validation of the debt.
In addition to your motion to show cause/contempt, I would also suggest filing a motion to clarify. As an example only: If she is the parent taking the child for treatment, then she needs to provide you with a copy of the PAID bill (unpaids, copays, whatever) within 20 days of service and you will have 20 days to pay your portion to her (if she’s a troll like ours is, you’ll want to make sure the bill has been paid & not just someone playing games with a copier in order to get some extra cash!!!). You might also consider adding in a clause were if there is anything other then emergency medical requiring an out of pocket expense of say, $250? That both parties must come to an agreement….
Good Luck!
KAT


wendl

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RE: support enforcement help dads?
« Reply #5 on: Dec 10, 2003, 01:35:38 PM »
you can file a contempt motion for unpaid daycare and request a judgement in the amoun that the other parent has failed to reimburse you for, then you request a garnshment with the judgement of unpaid daycare costs.  

Also show the daycare you divorce papers, when the bill is received pay only your portion and inform them you mailed your ex the copy of the bill and if that portion is unpaid they can bill her. When you send her the copy of the bill do it certified return receipt.

Hope this helps a little.  

2nd option (at least in some states) is you can your share of the daycare costs in your cs order, you would need to file a motion to modify cs but if you do this it could bite you if you have receieved a pay increase etc.

norma

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RE: support enforcement help dads?
« Reply #6 on: Dec 10, 2003, 06:28:15 PM »
do you live in NYS? you don't necessarily need to hire an attorney to file a petition against your ex-wife for her failure to pay the expenses she is required according to your agreement. the father's rights association in NYS (website is FRANY) can give you the detailed info you need. the chairperson at the group i attend has taken his ex-wife to family court several times without the cost of an attorney. he was successful on each account. one time, it was to lower his support based on the fact that he could prove she was using his CS to provide for herself.
GOOD LUCK!

norma

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RE: support enforcement help dads?
« Reply #7 on: Dec 16, 2003, 11:34:03 AM »
when you receive a bill, you should only be paying half of it. DO NOT PAY THE WHOLE BILL. you can simply call the doctor (or daycare, etc) and inform him that you are sending payment for half and direct him to send a bill to your ex-wife for the other half. you can then make a copy of the page in your divorce agreement that states the two of you are supposed to split 50/50 and send it to all these facilities informing them to keep it on record. that's your proof. they have to abide by the legal documentation. furthermore, you should file a petition against your
ex-wife in family court for violation of the order as would she if the situation was reversed.

 

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