Thank you for responding to my post. It's been pretty hard on me - the realization that no matter how bad it's been on the kid, any time I as the Non-Custodial Parent (and, *gasp* f a t h e r...) request the judge look at issues of the child's health and welfare, my ex-wife can just cluck her teeth, roll her eyes and say: "I know you are, but what am I", and the entire city is marching up my front walk with pitch-firks and lit torches.
>>We had to dig out things from 7 years ago. Our case was for custody and visitation issues and the
BM's attorney made it all about money!<<
Yeah, well my daughter was hit by the mother (although there is a no spanking clause in our order) and injured the child's wrist... there was also the time shortly thereafter that the child sustained an odd break to the same wrist (and rather than taking my daughter to the doctor like she said she would) - the child ends up hidden at grandma's house for 6 days). Let me reiterate that this is a 7 year old little girl who was cloistered at her gandmother's trailor in the local "hills" for 6 days while she suffered with a broken wrist. Then there were the eight cavities, two root canals and one molar extraction (I discover mom took the child to the dentist once in seven years, while revoking my parental rights in 1999, 2001, and then again in 2003 - thus interfering with my ability to take my daughter in for treatment).
On the three ocassions I did try to take my daughter to the doctor and dentist in 2001 - 2003, I was admonished with the reminder that I did not enjoy the "right" and privllege of taking my daughter to the doctor and / or dentist and then threatened with a restraining order.
And so it goes, there are the issues of the "hen-parties" during which my daughter was exposed to countless slurs against dad, including the "programming" of the child with the fear that the Christian church I take her to on Sundays is a CULT.
So, after about 3 years of this type of "father-hate" I motion the court to examine if a little extra time with dad might not be in order (with mom stating so proudly how she hs completed her undergraduate work in "record time" - now we know where the money for dental care went) and just until she completes her studies - AND I STATE THAT IT WAS MY WISHES TO LEAVE
CHILD SUPPORT WHERE IT'S AT AND NOT MODIFY IT TO SUITE MY ADDITIONAL TIME...
Next thing, and before we even have a chance to extablish whose going to have how much time with the child... opposing party motions for attorney fees and child support modification.
I mean it's like I just got rear-ended, but the person who ploughed into the back of my car - before our insurance companies have corresponded - is asking me to inventory how able I am to pay for their whip lash... if when they go to their doctor they end up having it... (wink, wink,).
>>BM and her attorney didnt give us anything that we had asked for in our production of documents. We asked for things like
CPS reports, complete
school records, criminal histories, pay stubs and tax returns and many many other things. Some of these things we actually already had but we wanted to see how truthful BM and her attorney would be. Well we got nothing we asked for and actually used that in court to prove that she is not trust worthy. When confronted on the stand with solid documents she continued to change her story and told several
more lies about EVERYTHING! All of her wittnesses had a diffrent story than she did and you can imagine that the judge was not happy.<<
Thank you! I just had an epiohany and now know what they are after and what to do to counter them!
>>We on the other hand provided EVERYTHING they asked us for in
the Interogs and production of documents. And all
DH's wittnesses had pretty similar stories because we were obviously telling the truth!<<
Yeah, well my lawyer is burning out becasue she didn't know what lovely people we were dealing with when we got started.
No doubt she thought that "it can't be ALL THAT BAD" and "these must be reasonable people who will do THE RIGHT THING when faced with it"
NO - she gets FREE LEGAL SERVICES and they have jacked my bill up to $11,000.00 - and we haven't even been to the hevidenciary hearing yet.
Now, If I motion that I think we have a case for contempt, I get the dull stare and the "do you know how much you are in this with me for" look.
Just today I had the dentist telling me that the mother of my child had convinced them that only she and never I was able to access my daughter's vital records. I mena here is the guy that I took the child to and set up the dental plan with AND NOW he's looking over his glasses at me with the "what can I do - my hands are tied" look.
I asked my attorney to fax them a letter setting them straight... my lawyer's husband tells me: "you can't afford a letter".
I have paid $5,100.00 and am paying $600.00 - $1,000.00 per month on a payment plan, and what do I get when I ask for a simple letter...
Finally I told the dentist to call their lawyer and ask about prental rights to access vital records custodial parent or not - in 15 minutes they called me to come get them.
This, my good readers is what I am up against.
>>My advise is to just give what ever they are asking for. And
BE HONEST or it will come back to bite you in the a$$!!<<
Oh, I can swear on my life that there will be some a$$ getting chewed alright and I can promi$e it won't be mine... at least according to what The State Bar of California and The California Committe for Judicial Reform have communicated to me.