Problem with my attorney

[superdad01]

Ok I hired an attorney last year. 1500 retainer fee. we negotiated 500 down and 100 per month until paid up. after our innitial consult Our first court date was postponed by her due to her mothers car accident that morning, which I understood things happen. Our second court date we was there 20 minutes and was refered to the foc for recomendation. The parenting time lady has taken 4 months to make her decision meanwhile I have been paying. The problem is now the attorney is not returning my calls. I called a week ago and left a message now that I have report. No return call. i have left message with her secetary... no return call.

 I understand people are busy etc. but I think it is a little extreme to not have a call back within 1 week.


From all accounts I hear she is very good in court. Should I fire her and  demand the balance returned. because there is no way I have used up what I have paid her already.

[mistoffolees]

I would try again - tell the secretary that you've been trying to reach her for a while. It could be that she's on vacation and the secretary isn't volunteering that information.

[notnew]

Unfortunately, things that are VERY important to you are probably not to the attorney.

Exactly what are you calling about? Maybe it is truly a non-issue and she just doesn't have time to respond. Who knows?

Have you tried e-mail? I find I get a better response when I send e-mails. I also send them with a delivery and read receipt required so I know when he or someone in his office reads it.

Hope this helps. If you don't understand how the system works, it can be frustrating when your attorney does not respond to what is an urgent matter for you. I would not fire her on this one thing.

[superdad01]

Well it's more than that. first and foremost I got the recomendation back that I was waiting on and now I need to file an appeal or whatever I gotta do to get back into court. I know their is a time limit on these things so I would like to get it taken care of.

[notnew]

You aren't giving enough information for anyone to give you a sensible answer.

If you need to file an exception to the recommendation, there are specific steps you need to take. Your jurisdiction has specific rules regarding this.

What about the recommendation do you object to and on what basis? You may not like to hear it, but your objections may not be valid ones and won't get you back in court. Who knows? You haven't posted any real information.

The relationship with your attorney is important if she is representing you properly and doing a good job for you. Breakdowns in this relationship could hinder your case. You need to move carefully.

I don't know if your requests of this attorney are reasonable or if you are a difficult client.

Can you please provide some more details like:

Is custody established? If so, what is it?

What are you in court for right now?

What was the recommendation for?

How does it affect the child?

And anything else you feel is necessary to post.

Otherwise, none of us can tell you anything.

[superdad01]

Well I thought I could avoid typing it all out but here goes...

Mom has sole custody and i have secondary physical custody.

I filed motion for increase in parenting time / custody back in Nov of last year. The first court date was postponed due to my attoeneys personal matter. Our second courtdate lasted 20 minutes and we was reffered to the FOC for a recomendation. That was in Janury. both parties had a meeting with her and we have been waiting on the recomendation for 3 months.

My change or circumstance was do to me changing shifts at work so I am avaible for parenting time with my daughter. I currently have Secondary physical custody ( which is a fancy term for nothing. )
I have parenting time with my daughter 10 - 14 days. Just not the overnights because at the time of the previous order I was working 3rd shift. I have been shortchanged on my parenting time 40 hrs a month since last august when I started on 1st shift again.

I am proposing a new schedule of 4 days on 3 days off and swithing it for 3 days on 4 days off the following week. i feel the child would benefit more by spending more time with each parent in their respectibe household than going back and forth on a daily basis. Same city and school district. but it takes an extra hour in my day going back  and forth picking her up and dropping her off daily.

Finally got the recomendation back last week and of course it did not give me what i wanted. The parenting time lady got a few things incorrect in the review such as Shift times and other things.

She said that i have lost valuable parenting time with daughter but it did not warrent changing custody to include overnights etc. She did say that in the summer time we could go week on week off. She also mentioned that I would not be avaible to get the child off to school in the morning.

Mom has been unemployed for the last 3 years +
The real kicker is she adjusted my child support to go up $40 a month.
I currently pay $500 a month and I got my child every 10 our of 14 days day.

Now I would assume that we need to be in court again to either impliment the new order or request a objection to the parenting time determination. Odviously I am not agreeing with what the parenting time lady said...

I don't feel like I am being a diffuclt client... All I expect is a phone call back within a week or a week and a half to tell me where we go from here. if I wait to long do I lose my right to appeal?  Is she dead? what's going on? ... I don't know because I can't get a phone call. My previous attoney i never had a problem with getting a phone call back.

[notnew]

You have to provide information so that others can understand what your situation is. Now, with all of this information, I can clearly see that you do need to file an objection to the recommendations.

I would make a copy of the recommendation and make notations on it regarding the errors and provide the accurate data to be entered on the document. Write a brief note to your attorney with your request and clearly state your desired expectation. Realize though that you may not get all that you ask for.

If there are no safety issues regarding you having contact with your child, then I see no reason why there shouldn't be any overnights. This just sounds wrong.

If the order hasn't been adjusted since you switched shifts, then you haven't lost any parenting time.

You need to take your focus off of YOU and put it on the child. All of this is about what is in the best interest of the child. This is a catch term that the court likes to hear. Stating that you are losing time and it is damaging your relationship with the child will fall on deaf ears. Now, rephrase that to say, it is not in the best interest of the child to be denied the time with the father, and it will taken in a totally different fashion. Crazy I know, but believe me, that is the way it is.

In your note to the attorney indicate that you have been trying to contact her repeatedly to address this issue as you are concerned about your time frame in being able to file an objection. Ask that she get back to you with her input by XXX day (I'd say 4-5 business days). Drop the letter and marked up copy of the recommendations off at her office your self. Don't mail them.

Does the recommendation or order that put it in place state there is a time frame to object once it is issued? I also think the length of time for the report to be completed is unacceptable, but it may be a moot point to bring up now being that it is now done. Perhaps you may have been better off pushing that issue earlier on. However, I feel it is a lost cause to focus on. You need to focus on maximizing the time your child has to spend with you.

In most states, CS amounts are based on the amount of overnights the child spends with the CP. The recommendations of the FOC are ensuring that your CS order will stay in the "sole" custody range. What you are proposing could drop the calculations into a joint custody range even though your order gives the CP sole custody. The number of overnights drives the calculators, not what the order is. Two different issues. I would raise this issue with your attorney as well. Make it clear that the CS amount is not the issue, but that you feel that your overnights may be being denied simply to keep the CS in a higher range. Just a thought. CS is a difficult issue to approach because so many people instantly assume that the NCP objects to ANY CS and just wants to avoid paying when in my experience that is the farthest from the truth. So, it is a touchy area to broach in open court.

If your attorney does not respond to you in the set time you gave her. Then perhaps you should have a meeting with your previous attorney or meet with a new attorney in anticipation of retaining new counsel. Did your previous attorney represent you in the action where your ex got sole custody? If so, I'd recommend a new attorney instead of using the same one. Sole custody is a crap deal and should be abolished. You are right, you basically have no rights to your child now and your ex is holding the trump card (your kid) while controlling everything.

Your parenting time order seems odd to me (I have standard EOW, EO holiday, and a short summer vacation). How many hours of the day do you  have the child for the 10 out of 14 days?

Additionally, the fact that your ex has been unemployed for over 3 years is not relevent. However, her income should be imputed to at least minimum wage or higher if she has the capacity to earn more (does she have a college degree, what type of work has she held before and what was her rate of pay, etc.). How is she surviving? The imputed income can also effect the amount of your CS.

I hope this has been helpful to you.

Not an attorney, just the voice of experience.

[superdad01]

I was on the phone with the foc weekly trying to get this chick to do her job in a timely manner.

Yea I understand what you are saying. I know to make the child needs first.

I am looking at her recomendation and I don't see any mention of filing an objection in 21 days or nothing up that nature.

yes my previous attorney represented me. I dident feel like she was assertive at all. I also feel like all she really tried to do was get through my retainer as soon as possible. Looking at it now I feel she had enough experience to know that we was not gonna come to an agreement before we went to court. But still I spent countless hours talking to a wall so to speak..... lol

Now what I did was negotiate to have my daughter as much as possible throughout the day. I was working 3rd at the time. That was the only thing she would agree to.
I had my daughter
Week 1: mon 4-8 tues 11-8 wed offday thurs 4-8 fri - sun 6pm
Week 2: mon 4-8 tues 11-5 wed 4-8 thurs - sun offweekend.

Mother is in school to be a nurse and should be working by summer so she says.  her previous job many years ago she made more than minimum wage. minimum wage has went from $5.50 - $7+ in MI. I make like $1.50 more than I did a year ago and my CS goes up $40 bux a month.

I found an article on here from masslawyers.com that has a case where the man got a substansial raise but the court did not raise his childsupport .

One of the issues I want to bring up is that one day she claimed I tried to run her over with my truck etc... and by giving me overnights we can eliminate that potential situation or accusations from happening.  She claims I am late daily... ( I keep a log as well as have witnesses)

[notnew]

Your persistance with the FOC may have contributed to the negative reporting. Not a knock against you, but just a word in your ear. It is key for you to learn how to be the squeaky wheel without creating a grinding noise that irritates people. I am not saying she was right and you are wrong. I am saying that people involved in this type of work either are very good or very bad. There are more rotten apples believe me.

There is a set of rules that the court expects everyone to adhere to which on the outside are not logical at all to us regular people. I am sure your previous attorney was following the rules in attempting to reach a settlement. Also, for most courts, mediation and/or settlement is HIGHLY encouraged prior to the court making the decision for the parties involved.

Your schedule appears to be a VERY generous one. Based on your posting it looks like you have your child EOW and a whole bunch in between which is way more than what is standard.

You could try to get a couple of overnights added in if the schedule won't interfere with the child's school or normal routine otherwise. It is hard to get things changed after the fact without a major change in circumstances and when they are working which it appears yours is.

I would leave the CS alone right now. It is an issue that will be subject to change within the next 6 months or so. So, going through the motions now to change it and then having to go back again so soon is a waste of the court's time. I would ask your attorney about this so she can address it in a letter to your ex's attorney.

Your stance should be that you want the child support to be correct. Not that you get to earn more money and pay no more. You don't want to look like  you don't want to take care of your child. I just went through a modification and only wanted it to be correct (I knew it was not calculated correctly originally and I had requested it to be correct). The CS was reduced however, I did not ask for a reduction.

I would not raise the issue of her allegation that you tried to hit her with your truck unless she raises it. Unless she brought charges against you (which she should do IF you did it, but I am assuming you did not for the purpose of this message board. I would assume you KNOW that those types of actions should never happen), it doesn't mean a thing. If she brings it up, your attorney can question her on the stand as to if she reported the incident. Your lawyer will know what to do with that.

It is imperative that you keep the issue that is most important to you to be addressed at the forefront. Clouding the situation with too many side issues and other items thrown into the fray will divert the court from your main goal and what you came there for could be lost entirely. Keep focused on the main issue and do the best you can to keep everyone else as focused as possible.

The FOC needs to be available to testify at your hearing so your lawyer can challenge the findings or whatever needs to be brought out can be done.

I would recommend contacting your attorney once a week for an update. I send an e-mail to mine once a week when we are awaiting action from the opposing side or when I am expecting a follow up on a request of him. Otherwise, I don't talk to him. The attorney's time is your money. Use it sparingly.

I don't know what else I can offer you as helpful advice. It is a painful waiting game that doesn't always come out the way it should or the way you want it to.

I would recommend that you puruse the family law section of your court's web site to learn about the processes that you are now involved in. Until you become famaliar with what is supposed to happen, you won't understand why things are not proceeding as you feel they should.

Also remember that the court, your lawyer and everyone else involved has their own lives and many other cases to consider. Your situation is important to you, but not to them. To them, it is just a job.

[superdad01]

Yea I understand what your saying about my persistance but I got a feeling I would've been waiting on that report for another 6 months. Honestly the way things have went throughout this ordeal I expected to lose. So I can't honestly be dissapointed. This court just bends over backwards for this woman. I don't understand it.

I left a letter for my atorney in her mail box on her door Monday. No call back as of yet.

I schedule I have is one that I negotiated. I got whatever I wanted just not full joint physical custody. Baiscally I have our child whenever I was not at work.

The part I don't understand is with the new recomendation it says I can have weekly parenting time in the summer. Well I will still be working and the child will still have to get up early or whatnot while I am working. So what is the difference between that and now? Sounds like BS to me...

Mother also claims I only want overnights to lower my childsupport. Does anyone know how I can effectively counter this statement?

My feeling was to get this situation done and over with now and avoid going back to court when she is working in 6 months. Her mom will be having the same early type schedule that I have now. I also know that mom will be a reg nurse and be earning much more than I do now.

When I brought up the alleged violence between parties I wanted to use that as an additional reason why the overnights would be a good idea. We would no longer have that daily contact and their would be no reason to make false allegations against either party.

Thanks for all the advice.

[notnew]

I don't think you are entirely understanding where I am coming from.

Child Support: If you settle the CS NOW and she goes to work in 6 months and starts making good money, then that is a significant change that would warrant a review of the CS amount. Her income will impact what your CS obligation will be no matter if she has sole or the child spends every night of the year with her. Do you understand that? By settling that issue now, you are effectively shooting yourself in the foot because if you wait, your CS order may be less then it would be now. Just my opinion. You can do whatever you want.

Another note: If mom goes to work as a nurse it is very likely she will have rotating shifts. That could work to your benefit. I think having a clause to have a review of things a few months after she is anticipated to begin working may be an advisable route to take. If mom is working some overnights, then the child should be with you.

Have you discussed right of first refusal? That is when the other parent needs a babysitter, they call the other parent and let them know and give that parent the chance to have the child before utilizing a caregiver.

Mother has already fired the "he only wants to pay lower support" bullet. You counter it by stating the obvious which is that CS is not a factor in this scenario for you. That you would be paying to support the child if you and the mother were together or not. That the important factor here is fostering a healthy relationship between the child and both parents so that the child can thrive and benefit from this relationship with BOTH of her parents. That the denial of the child to have a regular routine that includes overnights with her father is detrimental to her growth and development, etc. It stands to reason that a child needs to spend time with the mother that would include overnights and you feel that an equal amount of time with the father could only result in a benefit for the child as well.

The court does not care that you and the mother have issues in getting along at exchanges as it pertains to the two of you. They will probably look on this as a problem that would further support no overnights or less contact since the two of you appear to have trouble putting the child's needs first and getting along for the welfare of the child. Do you understand what I am saying here? I am not accusing you of anything, I am telling you how the court could look at it. What I was trying to say is: Did she file charges against you?  Did she report this "alleged" incident". Does she have any supporting witness or other evidence otherwise? If not, then  your lawyer should question her on the stand about this. If she feels or felt threatened by you, then why didn't she report the incident? Why didn't she request the exchanges take place at a public place or a police station to safeguard her against this type of event again? If she were in fear, she should have acted accordingly and if she didn't then it goes to show that she was never in fear.

Anyway, I hope some of this has been helpful. There are a lot of great articles on this site with a lot of information for situations such as yours. Look around and see what you can find that may help you.

Good luck.

[superdad01]

Now I understand where your comming from. That's what I needed to hear. I smell what your cooking now... lol

Yes I do have the first right of refusal in my order.

So would it be advisable to go ahead with the court dates and try to get the overnights implimented and just pay the childsupport until she starts working? Then down the road I would have a follow-up date set to determine the childsupport payment?  Technically She would be making more than me so would that make her have to pay me I wonder?

I don't know how her schedule is gonna go... (if she even works that is.)
I had debated on filling out a questionaire regarding their nurse schedules and hoping i could get some local rn's to fill it out and sign it  so I could bring it up in court as evidence regarding her possible schedules.

My attorney told me that even if she diden't work that she would have the earning capacity to have childsupport set at a rn wage

No word from the attorney as of yet... I made an appointment with another local attorney.

[notnew]

It may be good at this juncture to try to get a couple of overnights set in place to make the transition slow for the child to get used to it. It needs to be stipulated that mother is graduating in XXX month, and that you do not see a need for a CS review at this time, but to set a hearing in XXX month (about 3 months after her graduation) to review how the overnights are going and determine if increased overnights would be beneficial for the child, and to review CS since it is anticipated the mother will be working by then.

SO, if she is not working by that time, you have the word in the record that she was to be an RN by XX date and there is the ability to impute her income. AND, if she is working, you'll have the $$$ figures to factor CS correctly AND know what her schedule is (if rotating overnights are a part of it) and that will further your cause for more overnights.

Getting RN's to fill out a survey won't work. don't worry about that. Not all RN's have rotating shifts. Some work in private homes, or private practices. So, it is not a given she will have rotating shift, just a possibility  you will have to wait to find out about.

Your ex will never have to pay you CS unless you get physical custody. As long as it is joint or sole (one her side ), where she is maintaining physical custody, that will never happen.

What I explained earlier in how CS is typically figured, there are two columns, one for mom and one for dad.

# of overnights with each parent (must total 365)
Gross income of each parent
Then a formula multiplies what the actual total CS figure is for the child.
Another formula determines the percentage of responsibility each parent has for the CS figure based on the number of overnights.
The percentage is assigned to each parent and the corresponding amount is shown.

As long as the mother has physical custody of the child, your percentage of responsibility will be higher then hers. The combined incomes that both of you are taking in will increase the overall CS amount.

Do you know if she is honoring the right of first refusal?

I have to tell you that the arrangement you have set up is good and I caution you to mess with it too much. You may end up with less then you have now. I do agree that some additional overnights may be a reasonable request, but if I were you, I'd be prepared to settle for less then I asked for and quite possibly agree to leave it the way it is IF it looks like things could get real ugly.

JMHO - not a legal one.

[superdad01]

I still have not heard from my attorney a week after leaving a letter. I am meeting with another one next week. I will discuss your points with him and see what they say.

I think i need a total of 128 overnights in MI to qualify for the shared economic responsibility.

I always heard that whoever makes more in a joint custody situation pays CS.

I don't know for sure if she in honoring it or not.... I have had the child before and got called into work early. I called and she was not there. Well I said she needs to pick her up at gmas. Her parents was like She will be right back in 5 mins etc. excuse after excuse. This set off a huge fight because she did not want to come and get her. My mom ended up dropping her off instead of keeping her like I told her to do.

Then after  situations like this is when I get accused of trying to run her over etc.

Yea my situation is a generous one but it also a pain in the ass. It just gets very tiresome going back and forth on a daily basis. she refuses to help with transportation. I can't imagine keeping this current schedule up for the next 13 years. She claims to not have access to the vehicle she drives everyday. I am also asking for some transportation relief as well. I would be willing to do 100% if I did not have to go back and forth every day.

I mean the way that I look at it I can always compromise myself to a slightly better spot. I have alot going for me.

Since her her main issue I feel is the CS once I say give me the overnights and we will leave the cs alone for now that could be good enough until the next round. by that time I will already have the overnights established. I have her everyday and she is accustomed to seeing me everyday. I don't know how much time the child would actually need to adjust.

[notnew]

Well, I guess the only thing we can do now is wait to see what the attorney you interview thinks.

Good luck!

[superdad01]

yeah... Once again thank you for helping me out. I appreciate it.

[notnew]

I would arrange for a back up caregiver (like your parents or siblings if possible) to be in place should you be called in to work early again. Take care of this in advance. Then when and if it happens, you can call her as you are bound to by the right of first refusal clause and if she isn't home, you can tell whoever at her house that if she hasn't returned your message in 15 minutes, then you will treat this as her saying she cannot take the child and that the child will be at my mother, brother (whatever applies) and she can pick the child up from there.

When this happens, document the event in a letter that you send to her detailing your attempts to contact her.

I would be proactive with this. After speaking with whomever you make your back up arrangements with, I'd send her a letter saying that due to the possibility of getting called in to work early and she may be unavailable these are the steps you will be taking to ensure she is able to exercise her rights of first refusal:

1. Phone call to your residence.
2. If employed, phone call to your place of employment.
3. Wait 15 mintues for return call if message left at either of the above locations.
4. Follow up phone call to residence and/or place of employment to advise that the child will be in the care of XXX person at XXX address and phone number.
5. When first available, she can pick up the child at this location.

I would also give her the names, phone numbers and addresses of each of your back up caregivers in advance.

Send this letter certified, return receipt requested.

You should also have a follow up line that if she has an option she would prefer to be put in place, to please present it so the two of you can work to an agreement. Ask for her response within 2 weeks of receipt of the letter. State that if she does not respond within this time frame, that you will treat this as her agreement with your plan of action.

That way, you cover your ass and show that you have done all possible to keep the conflict from occuring again.

You need to take the emotional aspect out of your dealings with her. Everything should be business like and to the point. All communications should be about the care and custody of the child only.

It sounds like you are in a profession in which you are subject to be called in at different times. She will be as well being an RN.

Your profession is not something you should be penalized for. As long as you have measures in place to ensure your child is in safe care when you get called in unexpectedly, the court should not have a problem with this. If fact, I think it would work in your favor to have been so careful in your planning of things.

I hope I have been helpful. You will only know if you are going in the right direction after interiewing your new attorney and when the judges signature goes on your new order.

I'd be interested in hearing how your interview went. You are welcome to send me a PM through this site if you don't want to post it for all to see.

have a great weekend!