Husbands two children are 21 & 20 (11/87, & 4/89) both are still in college.
Child support obligations end at 21 in NY, and unless your court orders indicate an agreement to pay for post secondary college expenses the courts cannot order you to pay after age 21.
Husbands children have always lived with their mother after the divorce, with dad having visitation;
major custody and support issues plagued his relationship with both his ex-wife and as a result his children. His daughter has had little contact with father, short of Christmas and birthdays. Step daughter stopped coming to our house all together. She was too busy to go see dying and devoted paternal grandfather even though the trip was arranged during dad's summer vacation visitation period; and she made no contact with her own father for his birthday and father's day even.
She goes to college out of state, and all though she is frequently back in the area dad does not hear from her.
Last year her mother took dad to court again in a support issue, requesting additional money for child support and that college expenses be allocated to each parent. ( You member that you have to becareful for what you ask for....) Dad was paying $660.00 every two weeks all and $5,000.00 a year for college tuition for each child, as well as 80% of non covered medical expenses, (dad & I carry the medical, dental and eye insurance.)
Mom's real beef was that I am primary for insurance reasons as NY is a coordination of benefits state.
There is a trial and husband is ordered to pay $178.80 per week for daughter
when she is home from college, pro-rated to $58.15 per week, and then 68% of college expenses for daughter, starting with the fall 2009 school year, as well as 100% of medical costs.
She goes to college and mom continues to send my husband e-mails and crazy bills, and demands that he transport step daughter to her doctors appointments and do a major part of the transporting back and forth to college, which is a 4 hour drive each way.
Recently my husband receives a bill for summer tuition, a little over 4k, for one summer class to be taken at the college, dad pays. Then receives another e-mail from his ex-wife that states that he owes additional money. Husband calls the college and is told that he owes another 2k, plus a $50.00 late fee, as daughter is also taking an internet class this summer.
My husband is most upset about the late fee and contacts his daughter, and leaves her a voice mail, he wants bills mailed to him, if he is going to be responsible for them, etc.
Step-daughter send him an e-mail: "I am not responsible for my college costs....you can call the college to get information if you kept your bills...." on- and on. Dad writes her back and tells her he is making it her responsibilty as she is the one going to college, etc.
Dad can afford to pay college costs becasue we have 5 kids between us, so we had to plan ahead, and live well with in our means. Issue is that his ex-wife has the daughter taking out student loans to cover mother's share of expenses, so she is of no help, and husband feels torn as to whether or not he should continue to assit his daughter after she turns 21, when she does not appear to appreciate what he is doing now.
Has anyone else experienced this type of situation? Any thoughts?