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Author Topic: Advice needed please on responding to Court Motion  (Read 16826 times)

Heston

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Re: Advice needed please on responding to Court Motion
« Reply #30 on: Aug 20, 2011, 02:43:56 AM »
As the hearing approaches, things are getting bad.  My daughter fell off her bike a few weeks ago and got multiple abrasions on her body and face.  I took her to the emergency room, so have a record of that.  Was instructed to put ointment on the abrasions for a couple of weeks.  The BM btw, did not follow thru on that, but that isn't proveable.  I could really use some advice to fight what the BM and her husband are doing.  They took my daughter to the "counselor", and told her to say that I caused all her injuries.  They said if she didn't tell her that, then they would go to jail.  So she did and she told me.  At least I know.  The BM and husband are acting over confident, as if they are certain they are going to win.  Now for the latest...I was informed by email by the BM that my daughter has a broken finger, with a story as to how it happened.  She then arrived for a parental weekend.  Turns out that first, the BM waited a week before getting a cast put on the broken finger.  That will be hard to prove.  And worse still, the step-dad broke her finger and took her to the counselor (usually the BM takes her) and told her to tell the counselor her brother did it.  So we now have a scenario of the step dad physically abusing my child to coerce her into telling the counselor stuff to get me out of my daughter's life.  They are abusing my child but I am unable to prove it.  But they are making false allegations against me to both the police (nothing will happen there as the police could see there were no problems each time reports were made) but they are planning on using the counselor as a witness to back up their false allegations.  In other words, if the child says it to the counselor, it must be true.  I will object to the counselor but have to allow for the fact the judge may listen to her.
 
The mother is now taking more video movies of my daughter at drop offs.  She is saying things to make her cry (at the thought of missing her mom and her fear for her mom which is constant) and getting closeups so she can show this evidence as "fear" or "reluctance" at seeing me.  In fact, when the BM doesn't do this, my daughter is pleased to come visit with me and have some sanity and fun in her life.  It's clear to see what they are doing.    My child is not likely to tell anyone else that her mom makes her lie because she is so scared her mom will be sent to jail.  Just wondered if anyone has any ideas of what I can do with limited evidence. 


Simplydad

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Re: Advice needed please on responding to Court Motion
« Reply #31 on: Aug 20, 2011, 09:38:38 AM »
Heston,
 
You are still letting your ex get into your head.....she is doing a masterful job of getting you completely stressed out.
 
Everything you mentiond seems to be nothing but he said, she said from your ex.
 
 Your daughter is seeing a counselor who is not licensed to practice. Furthermore if there is all of this evidence of abuse how come no one has called Child Protective Services?
 
Again....you need to file a motion to have a GAL representing your daughter and site Parent Alienation Syndrome.

Heston

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Re: Advice needed please on responding to Court Motion
« Reply #32 on: Aug 20, 2011, 11:59:48 AM »
I do plan on filling a motion for a GAL.  But things have stepped up as the step dad has broken my child's finger and threatened to break another one if she doesn't lie to help them achieve their goals.  It's getting serious. 

Simplydad

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Re: Advice needed please on responding to Court Motion
« Reply #33 on: Aug 22, 2011, 07:00:13 AM »

I do plan on filling a motion for a GAL.  But things have stepped up as the step dad has broken my child's finger and threatened to break another one if she doesn't lie to help them achieve their goals.  It's getting serious. 

 
This is serious and you need to call the police and child protective services.

Heston

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Re: Advice needed please on responding to Court Motion
« Reply #34 on: Aug 22, 2011, 05:22:51 PM »
I have done this today.  Plus filed a motion asking that the step father is prevented from being near my daughter.  The BM and the step father are such expert liars and also my child is so intimidated by them, I am not sure if the outcome will be as I hope it will be.


Heston

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Re: Advice needed please on responding to Court Motion
« Reply #35 on: Aug 23, 2011, 06:05:18 AM »
I tried to file either an EPO or restraining order against the step dad yesterday.  Spent all day at the court house.  Unable to do it.  Can only do them if I am related to the person in question or am part of their family unit.  They do not cover children.  Double checked on the court's legal forms when I got home.  Impossible to file either one.
 
I would be filing as dad with joint physical and legal custody against step dad in residential home.  Actually stepd dad on and off, but currently on. 
 
Although I contacted CPS, I feel its vital to file some sort of protective order.  BM most likely will be able to fob the CPS off, based on what she has done to date. 
 
Really needs to be done today.  Should have been done yesterday.  Does anyone know if this is possible?
 
Thanks

Kitty C.

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Re: Advice needed please on responding to Court Motion
« Reply #36 on: Aug 23, 2011, 10:02:23 AM »
I'm not so sure about the impossibility of an RO....seems to me that if a child's safety is at stake, they would think differently about it.
 
You're doing this all on your own, right?  Then you have to consider that the courts may not want to work with you because you are pro se.  When they told you no, did they site the specific laws that back up their answer?  If not, go back and ask them.  But you also need to realize that the only way to get through this is to have an atty. on your side.  The issues you're dealing with now are WAY too important to try to muddle your way through.  This may be a rare opportunity you have to try to get something in place to protect your child...dot the i's and cross the t's to ensure it's done properly.
 
Also keep in mind that the court and/or CPS may not give your situation the attention it needs simply for the fact that they may be assuming this has to do with a custody dispute (which it is) and you're just a disgruntled father who's trying to shaft the BM.  Which is why it is SO important to have an objective 3rd party do any reporting of abuse.  They don't have an emotional stake in the situation like you do.  So if you took her to an MD to have her finger evaluated, did they say anything to you about the possibility of abuse?  Did your dau. tell them how it broke/who broke it?  If so, then THEY should be making a report of abuse to CPS and doing so immediately.  If I were you, I'd be going back to that MD and asking some very pointed questions.  Because if they suspect abuse and they didn't report it, they can get into a LOT of trouble.  Get a copy of the notes from that visit, too.....you will definitely need it.
 
Given all that's going on here, I really can't see how you can get through this without an atty. to navigate the minefield.  Because all it will take is one small misstep from you to blow the whole thing apart....you really need to CYA right now, for your child's sake.
Handle every stressful situation like a dog........if you can't play with it or eat it, pee on it and walk away.......

ocean

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Re: Advice needed please on responding to Court Motion
« Reply #37 on: Aug 23, 2011, 10:51:47 AM »
When I got an RO on DH ex it was through the police department and criminal court. (since we were not related...and the police charged her with harassment). When/If the police charge him with something (assault?) then you can ask for a retraining order from the DA office.
Did school start by you? You can talk to counselor at school and tell them exactly what is going on and see what child tells counselor at school. Then they must call cps too..and here they come that day to the school and interview child without either parent. (not sure if you want school involved or not but an option).

Heston

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Re: Advice needed please on responding to Court Motion
« Reply #38 on: Aug 23, 2011, 01:06:38 PM »
The injury was done a week before they got her seen by an md.  They got the cast put on, same day she was delivered for weekend visit.  Maybe to hide the injury.  I wanted to go back to the hospital with my daughter but she insisted she didn't want to go.  I do need to take her to a medical doctor and will do if the bm does not stop visits.  It's like now it's just my word on it.  I definitely need a third party involved. 
 
Until that happens the police can't press charges.  I will pursue this because a restraining order is important.  It will be difficult for my daughter to tell a third party due to the threats.  I will consider the school option too.
 
Thanks for the suggestions.

Simplydad

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Re: Advice needed please on responding to Court Motion
« Reply #39 on: Aug 23, 2011, 01:41:17 PM »
Heston,
I am going to have to agree with Kitty.  There is no way you can take this battle on yourself.  You are going to need an attorney.

 

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