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Author Topic: Is this possible??  (Read 7651 times)

gnicar23

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Is this possible??
« on: May 28, 2011, 11:03:35 PM »
I have just talked to my ex's mother, not by her choice but I ran into her and cornered her about my son's whereabouts, he was taken a few months ago by his BM out of the US. I asked her how his BM did this legally since I did not give permission and the grandmother told me that since I was behind on child support at the time, that the mother went to the court and they gave her permission to go anywhere she wanted without me even being notified. My child support is current now and has been for several months. I was just behind for a few months at the end of the year because of the economy and lack of work.
 
Could she really have done that without notifiying me at all? Why would I not have been served with something?
What kind of recourse is there, if any?
I feel like I keep getting railroaded when all I want is to see my son.
 
I am not trying to force my ex to come back here, nor am I trying to take my son from her, I just want to make contact with him and have regular visitation with him. I want to know that he is ok and I want him to know that I am not giving up on him or our relationship and that I am always going to be here for him no matter where she takes him off to.
 
This is the hardest thing I have ever had to go through and I just feel lost.


Kitty C.

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Re: Is this possible??
« Reply #1 on: May 28, 2011, 11:16:28 PM »
In order to take the child out of the US, he would have to have a passport.  In order for him to have a passport, BOTH parents have to sign for it.  As far as I know, the ONLY way just one parent would be able to approve for a passport is if it was court-ordered.  And if that happened, you would have had to be notified.  You need to contact an atty. about this.
 
Personally, I think the story the BM's mother is giving you is just that...a story.
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MixedBag

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Re: Is this possible??
« Reply #2 on: May 29, 2011, 07:02:35 AM »
In theory Kitty is right...
 
BUT...
 
There are ways around that.
 
If Mom went back to court, she may have gotten sole custody.
 
And yes, you should have been notified.
 
SO....go get a copy or take a look at what's in the record to see if anything happened.
 
BM may have claimed she didn't know where you were to have you personally served and then put a notice in the paper and had you served that way.
 
And If she doesn't have sole custody, write the passport folks and see if they can get a copy of the passport application and work with them on that angle.
 
BUT it's up to you to go to court and file if Mom is not following the order.
 
 

gnicar23

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Re: Is this possible??
« Reply #3 on: May 29, 2011, 12:13:58 PM »
In our state the mother automatically gets full custody since we were never were married. However it was just an understood full custody, nothing was ever officially on paper and I am on the birth certificate. My son is only 8 and does not require a passport but must have something from both parents on the birth certificate if she tries to leave the country with him. However, she had nothing from me. If she did go through the courts for anything, shouldn't I have been notified or at least my attorney? Just wondering if she would have been able to pull this of without me being notified. They really are some very underhanded people who manipulate the system anyway they can!
 
I truly don't believe she has any documentation that states that she has full custody because I was trying to get school records and the school was giving me a hard time saying they had to verify from mom that I was entitled to them. The BM did not have anything to give the school to keep me from getting the documents. They finally gave me his school records but they removed all of his personal information. The school said that they did that becasuse they had to provide the records because there was nothing keeping me from the information but that BM had requested that I not have their address and phone numbers.

ocean

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Re: Is this possible??
« Reply #4 on: May 29, 2011, 12:50:28 PM »
Few things-
-Children NEED passports, they get a child one that is good for 5 years.-
-Mother can sign for passport if she has sole custody or asked the courts for the ability to apply for the passport.
-The school must give you the paperwork even if she has sole custody, that is a federal law that each parent has access to child's perm record folder which has grades and attendance. Some schools give more than that. She would have to give the school court orders that you are not allowed to have the paperwork.

Ask the courts for a copy of everything and see if she has it. Also, look online. Here, we can see our file and what has been filed online.
You can also, as the father, put a stop on child's passport. Look online for the site to put your child on the list. Get paperwork together to file for visitation, and hire an investigator to see if she is in the country or when she comes back to visit, she can be served. Depending on the country she is in, you may be able to get help having her served. She will be forced to come back to the US to deal with this in a US court.

Was this child born in the US? That changes some things...


gnicar23

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Re: Is this possible??
« Reply #5 on: May 29, 2011, 01:40:21 PM »
Yes, he was born and raised right here in my home state. His mother and I only lived about 1 mile from each other when she up and took off with him. The school only provided me with a copy of his report card but his personal information was all whited out.
 
If she asked the courts for a passport, would I have had to be notified?
If she would have asked for full custody, would i have been notified?
 
She couldn't say she didn't know where i was, becasue I was within a mile of her before she took off.
 

ocean

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Re: Is this possible??
« Reply #6 on: May 29, 2011, 02:00:31 PM »
Well, she could of went in and said, the passport people will not let me get a passport and I never married father, and do not know where he is. They could of just ordered that she be allowed to get a passport. They should of notified you. She would of had to go to the family court near you if you are that close. In NY, you can look it up by last name online. See if your state has that. Also, go to the family courts and ask if anything has been filed with your child's name on it or yours and claimed she could not find you. If you ever went to court with her, then they use the same file number each time either of you file something. So if you have a file number you can ask for the whole file. Look through and make copies of whatever you need.

You can call the passport number too and see what they would need to give you info if your son was ever given a passport.

Are you sure she is out of country? They may be convincing you of that so you do not look. WHat does the school say about child not showing up? Did she ask for school records to be forwarded anywhere? If not, they should be filing educational neglect for child not showing up at school.

gnicar23

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Re: Is this possible??
« Reply #7 on: May 29, 2011, 02:14:28 PM »
Yes, she transferred his school records that is how I located her general area. However, she moved to an area with a population of 300,000 people and she is in the states now (Alaska) but she traveled thru Canada to get him there. We are from a town with a population of 3,000 people. My attorney's office is right across the street from the court house. Can I look up online to see if he has a passport? The local school here gave me copies of everything, no problem, including his transfer request. His new school up there was denying me his information for so long and just recently sent me a copy of his whited out report card

ocean

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Re: Is this possible??
« Reply #8 on: May 29, 2011, 04:18:24 PM »
Try this site: Not sure how long ago she left but it may still be in their system..
http://travel.state.gov/passport/status/status_2567.html
Also, have your lawyer send a letter to the school now that you know which on it is and demand to get the full records with nothing blocked or you will file a federal complaint.

Kitty C.

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Re: Is this possible??
« Reply #9 on: May 29, 2011, 07:10:43 PM »

Yes, she transferred his school records that is how I located her general area. However, she moved to an area with a population of 300,000 people and she is in the states now (Alaska) but she traveled thru Canada to get him there. We are from a town with a population of 3,000 people. My attorney's office is right across the street from the court house. Can I look up online to see if he has a passport? The local school here gave me copies of everything, no problem, including his transfer request. His new school up there was denying me his information for so long and just recently sent me a copy of his whited out report card

 
Okay, that changes things...a LOT.  I was of the impression that the BM and child were out of the country now.  Now it appears she traveled through Canada just to get to Alaska, right?  And if I remember right (from a previous post of yours), you said that she traveled to Alaska in Jan. or Feb., right?  Something stills seems fishy about that, because the ONLY way to drive to Alaska is by the Alaska Highway and it would be practically impassable during the winter.  Do you know how she got to Alaska...are you sure she didn't fly?  A lot of DOT research would have to be done, for both Alaska and Canada, but it's very possible that parts of that highway are literally shut down during winter because it's that difficult to keep it open due to snow.
 
This whole thread regarding passports could be a moot point, depending on how she and the child traveled.  Confirm that and lyou will have a starting point of reference regarding court action.
Handle every stressful situation like a dog........if you can't play with it or eat it, pee on it and walk away.......

 

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