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Author Topic: Mom wants to keep current support and move to another state  (Read 2671 times)

worried Dad 5401

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I have been divorced since 2007 and have picked up my 4 kids (girl turning 18, girl 14, girl 12, and boy 8) for the last 7 years every other weekend without skipping a beat. I have also paid my child support without missing a payment. My oldest child turn 18 in july and she is due to come off my child support obligation (will remian in the area attending College) and Mom said she wants to keep the child support the same for another 2 years like if I am paying for 4 kids and move to Arizona in July as well.

I have always been there for my children and have always lived to my obligations as a father. I always felt that the kids needs both parents in their life and I have such a connection with them that it will tear me into pieces if they move away almost 3,000 miles. Especially, in a point in their lives that they need a father figure more than ever. She claims she needs help from her parents (live in Arizona) but I feel her parents raised their chrildren and rasing my children is my and her responsibility not her parents.

She has never worked since our divorce and claims she is unable to find a job. My question is why did she wait so long and when the chid support is due to be reduce for her to come up with this excuse of not being able to find a job. I dont know what I can do or if have any options. please help. Worried Dad


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Re: Mom wants to keep current support and move to another state
« Reply #1 on: Apr 29, 2014, 09:32:06 AM »
You can file a motion that she can move but the kids stay in the area.  If they were to move in with you, would it change their schools and/or activities? 

She is correct is her belief that the children are the responsibility of her and you, however, moving implies that she can't handle her end of the responsibility.  You've handled your end just fine.  Would it be possible for you to become the primary caregiver?  Chance are pretty good at the ages you listed, the children do not wish to move.

ETA:  You have options.  She doesn't have the final say and taking the children away from an involved parent isn't the answer.
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Re: Mom wants to keep current support and move to another state
« Reply #2 on: Apr 29, 2014, 04:32:33 PM »
Go to family court and get a restraining order that the kids can not be pulled out of their current school district. Call the school weekly and ask if they received any forwarding paperwork for your children.

She has been relying on your child support to live and lowering it will impact it. Is your OD going to stay with you for community college if mom leaves area?

Once you get the restraining order (or modification with same provision- mom will not move children out of current school district) then she will have to ask the courts to move and give a good reason. SHE can move, but children stay with you. I agree, if you are in same school district, better for you but still, prove you have been in their life and that you want to remain a father. Offer to watch kids more, take extra nights and feed them dinner to reduce her bills for them. You can take them Fri-mon bring to school. If you are closer to school, overnight midweek and get them to school.

What types of jobs could your ex do? certifications? If you go to court, print out job opportunities that she could get here, especially if all the kids are in school and older ones can babysit younger ones.

Good luck! You can file for modification or restraining order yourself at family court near mom or last family court you were in. If you only went to divorce court, go to family court by mom and file. Tell them what you want and they will have you fill out paperwork (bring divorce papers) and it is usually free or small filing fee. -depends on the state.
Good luck!


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