Welcome to SPARC Forums. Please login or sign up.

Mar 28, 2024, 10:36:33 PM

Login with username, password and session length

Summer vacation problems

Started by TCG, Apr 29, 2005, 01:33:16 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

TCG

It's funny how, looking down the page, there are so many questions about Summer vacation.

Here is our situation.  DH is NCP with EOW and Mondays.  Per the parenting agreement, DH gets two additional weeks of parenting time (to be taken consecutively or intermittently) with thirty days notice to the mother.  No specification is made for mother's vacation, and she usually doesn't take one.  Nothing is said about them needing to "agree" or mother getting "approval".

Every year, there is an issue with this - every year it's something different.

This year, DH sent written notification of dates on 4/25.  Dates chosen were 7/8 through 7/22.  Pretty straightforward, 'eh?

Got a message last night that "those dates won't work" because BM has signed SD up for activities for pretty much the entire month of July.  A few days of "volleyball camp", "soccer camp", "drama camp" and a week-long girl scout camp.  None of these are "required" activities - just for fun.  Gave a song and dance about not being able to get a refund, which is a lie since I called the school and they said they'd be happy to give her a refund.

In the past, she has scheduled activities and there have been conflicts.  DH has told her that if she would only notify him before signing SD up, he would try to accommodate as much as possible or he would at least be able to let her know of any potential problems so she didn't get SD's hopes up only to have DH come in and be the bad guy.  

This year, the two week segment happens to be the only segment DH can take due to his job.  You all know how it is - it has to be approved, and once it's approved, good luck changing it.  BM doesn't work and probably has no concept of this.

DH is ready to send her a certified letter saying that he has done what is required per the parenting agreement, and the fact that she signed SD up for camps is really her problem.  The other option is he reschedules, we go on our planned vacation without her, and her two weeks here are spent hanging with me at home while DH works.  Either way SD is missing out on something and DH is the mean old daddy.  Plus, it's not exactly a good option, and really only reinforces that BM can do what she wants and he'll bend over and take it.

So, any idea of how this might turn out?  My concern is she'll try to take it before a judge and it could go either way.  How do you feel a judge might rule?  Would she even get it into court given that he has abided by the agreement?  It's not like SD is going to shrivel up and die if she misses camp - and we feel that family time is just as important since we have so little of it.