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Author Topic: A new beginning....  (Read 2252 times)


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A new beginning....
« on: Jan 29, 2004, 03:35:25 PM »
My husband spoke to his daughters in person for the first time in 18 months.  The joint counseling started last night.  I was not involved in the sessions, but our children and I made the two-hour drive with my husband to support him and to see the girls.

Everyone was so excited!  It was like they didn't even skip a beat--Dad was goofing around, my SDs were laughing and hugging and TALKING non-stop.  According to my husband, the counselor was getting more and more annoyed because no one wanted to play her "games."  They just wanted to talk with each other.  Counselor kept asking YSD if she had any concerns, the response: "I'm hungry."  OSD's concern was that she didn't want to have to wait too long to see her dad again.

According to what the counselor told my husband last week, the joint counseling is supposed to be a transition into supervised visits.  Hopefully, counselor can see past her degree on the wall and realize she is not needed.  She indicated it would be just a few sessions.  BM's mom was the one who took SDs to the counseling session, and will likely be doing supervised visits, and she seemed pretty anxious to get things moving.

We are pretty peeved at the counseling center, and view them as responsible for at least the past 15 months of missed time with my SDs. (Counselor intern the girls saw originally testified in court that absolutely my husband was abusing them, and there was no way SDs were lying about it.  We later received copies of their records indicating that OSD admitted to lying, but didn't want BM to get in trouble.)  I was so proud of my husband when he told the counselor straight out that he thinks they screwed up.  At first he was just going to go along, say what they want to hear.  We are both relieved that he decided to stick with the plain old truth.  She was doing the whole counselor thing asking "What do you want out of the counseling?" And he said "I want my kids back."  She didn't like it when he told her we were jumping through the hoops and she was just one of the hoops.

Anyway, it was just refreshing to see my SDs and to KNOW that they are not scared of Dad like everyone has been saying.  Our 3-year old was excited to see his sisters--kept trying to pull them into our car instead of their grandma's.  It was harder with my 18-month old; she last saw her sisters when she was 3 days old, and she is a shy one around strangers.  She'll warm up quickly enough.  It was just soooo good to see them!!!

Kitty C.

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« Reply #1 on: Jan 30, 2004, 09:06:57 AM »
I'm SOOOO glad for you all!  It must have been a WONDERFUL reunion!  I can just imagine the look on the counselors face, knowing that the court info says they were scared of him, but now they act like this towards him!  I don't think these counseling sessions will last too long either!
Handle every stressful situation like a dog........if you can't play with it or eat it, pee on it and walk away.......


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Good thoughts for you
« Reply #2 on: Jan 30, 2004, 09:58:12 AM »

My DH and I went through the same exact thing from his vindictive and malicious Ex.  All I can say is that it's made our bond with his daughter even stronger, trusting and more loving.  My stepdaughter knows how much we love her and work to see her and even more, how honest and forthcoming we are.  

Kids have pure hearts and know the truth.  My SD is 6 now and has no recollection of when she was 2-3 years old and never saw her dad.  Thank God for that.  It's easier to put that traumatic event behind us.  I pray to also forget some day.

Good Luck and God Bless.


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