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Author Topic: Would rather just 'do nothing'  (Read 1908 times)

dipper

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Would rather just 'do nothing'
« on: Jun 24, 2005, 08:52:39 PM »
DH has filed for change in custody of yss.  There are several issues involved.  Back in January, we went to court, but ss changed his mind and wanted to stay with bm.  (lots of bribing going on there...oh well...)

BM goes to all IEPs and when ss was in the hospital, she was the most devoted soul - changing bandages even though the nurses were there to do it.  That is the way she is - as long as there is a crowd, she is great...its the times when no one is there to tell her how wonderful she is that things get kicked to the side.  such as bandages - he didnt need them after a few days of being home...interesting...

We cannot afford a lawyer - again.  DH wants this so badly, but I am the one who does the typing for him and handles any business part of it - finding out what he needs to do, etc.  I even made him an appt with a lawyer today just to get information and got all the papers we had together to take with us.

We wound up filing additions today - adjustment in copay of medical bills and a show cause on some violations of the court order.  And I am so nervous - I just feel she is going to do something spiteful due to the show cause.  I cant think of anything dh has done wrong - other than maybe twice taking ss home no more than 30 minutes late....compared to her 2 1/2 hours late bringing him....as she was having dinner with her buddies..

Oh well, just nervous and sometimes - I just want to let things go and not have to worry so much about it...about court...about what is going on with the school, etc......just say, ok - you come on visitations and we will have  good time...and leave everything else to bm, because she tries her best to cut dh out anyway....It is a never ending struggle...


upsetstpmom

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RE: Would rather just 'do nothing'
« Reply #1 on: Jun 30, 2005, 04:41:43 PM »
I know exactly how you feel. my dh has a 5 year old. His BM is th "mother of the year" around everyone else, but in reality he gets no time with her at all. he is shuffled from one friend/relative to another while she is at work. when he comes to our house its like everything is an act. he always reminds us of how many days he has left till he goes home, and when that day comes he's all excited about it until it's time to go home, then he acts all sad and says, "you're not gonna cry are you daddy? I'll be back in 2 weeks." he sniffles and acts like his crying, but when he goes to hug his dad, he just acts like he's ready to just get this over with. My DH always gets upset & cries when my ss walks away. His BM has conbstantly tried to take my DH's rights away, and use my ss against him, and its like,"when is it gonne be enough!" It's hard to say that, cuz i've always been the 1 to tell my husband not to give up, but how do you know when its never gonna be enough? How can you say, "there's nothing else you can do but what The BM will let you do"?  

dipper

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RE: Would rather just 'do nothing'
« Reply #2 on: Jul 09, 2005, 08:26:59 PM »
"there's nothing else you can do but what The BM will let you do"?

That is a true statement.  I get so sick of the games.  Its constant -never lets up.  BM does exactly as she pleases.  Everything is always in her favor - and then she acts as if things were changed around for dh's sake- when things are only changed in her favor.  

DH has notified the school for info on ss and then they dont advise him of an IEP, she doesnt either...and promised to send him a copy....dh even asked in writing for it....the school didnt respond and she still hasnt gave him one....three weeks later.

Also, yss was here for two weeks...she called him twice with the first three days..and then nothing for over a week.  We went on vacation on Tuesday - and she called that day and every day after FROM work -where she is with cousins....asking ss to call her back.  TH she stated that she had tried and tried to reach him..and she wanted to know how he was and when he was coming home.  

They are to go to court in August - and evidently she is doing this to act like she didnt know where ss was and was worried sick - I mean, every call was from work...and she knew where we were.....and she didnt call until the day we left home.....

She doesnt have her past lawyer - but we know she has one......she sent dh a letter informing him of something and it didnt have any stupid accusations in it- it was more business like....not in her realm at all...definitely advised by someone else...

I have been staying very sick on the stomach if I just think about this woman.....I go to sleep and wake up nauseas during the night......

Its unreal.....

 

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