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Holding my breath

Started by Ref, Sep 06, 2006, 09:46:06 AM

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Ref

Thanks Hag, but I don't think she deserves ANYTHING. Not with that tone. The items in the catalog she NEEDS come to about $425 of fashion statements as well as a whole sheet set with quilt for her room at her moms(another $250). We haven't gotten a matching sheet set for ourselves in over 10 years and her mom bought her a set 2 years ago. She included bandanas and shoes and several sweaters (she lives in Florida).

SD mentioned a couple of weeks ago that she was concerned about being able to afford anything after the change in CS. I told her that all she needs to do is call and ask. DH is still paying the higher amount, until next month and instead of asking she writes this rude letter demanding he get her these things and telling him his duty.

If she needed anything, we would not keep it from her but she even says that we bought her jeans, shirts etc. We also purchased underwear and socks. We took her shopping in July and she said she really didn't need anything. She also said her mom bought her substantially more clothes. To me, if she has 3 pairs of jeans, 2 pairs of pants, 7 shirts, shoes and underwear, she has what she needs. Based on what we bought her, she has more than that PLUS the "substantially more" items that her mom bought.

dipper

Hagatha,

I didnt say anything about sending CS information - other than I think it would be fine for dad to say I did help pay for your clothes by CS.

I wouldnt buy her anything with her writing a letter like that myself.  

dsm

Y'all don't have to ignore the rudeness of her letter.  But, understand that she is very under the influence of her mother's negativity toward you and referring to you as having the 'duty' to do these things for her.....Realize that too.  Call her on it.  Definitely, call her and if you get the voicemail, leave a message that you wanted to go over the items.  You're right, she probably will call back within a few seconds.  Then, take the opportunity to go over things that she really likes.  Before you let her go, explain that her manner of asking for this stuff is out of line and that y'all will *consider* some of the items, but not all; and maybe not any.  Point out what you just posted - that in July you just bought x,y,z.  Point out that lots of people would like to have a new bed set, but that doesn't mean that it happens.

Then, do what you are able to.  Consider for Christmas gifts - teenagers are difficult anyway to buy for and you've got some specific things.  

Good luck!

:)

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dsm - 35; DH - 39; SD - 17; LO - 10; BB - 3
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3 Cheap Entertainment cats - Sam,  Snoop & Dagger
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Live, Love, and Laugh
dsm - 44
DH - 48
SD - 26
LO - 19
BB - 12
1 demon who provides cheap entertainment of the fluffy and furry kind.

My mantra - it's time for me to do for me and mine so we can live in the present and not fret about the past nor worry about the future.  What is, is