Christmas ..........

[Stepmom0418]

Well those of you that know our story will know that it is nothing new for my DH to get denied visitation. We drove this morning to pick up SS at the neutral drop off point and once again, BM was not there and neither was SS!! We waited for 30 minutes (very painful minutes as we knew what she was doing!) After waiting we got a reciept from the station and headed back home.

DH was fighting the tears all the way home. This bothers me alot to see him cry because he is one of those guys that does not cry!

We have 4 kids that live with us on a daily basis and they are so tore up over this. They say.......This is not fair mom and dad! We want our brother here for Christmas like he is supposed to be! We are not having Christmas till our brother is here! I have already seen anger and tears from them and its so sad because I cant even protect my children from this PBFH!!!!!


So Christmas will wait.................till god only knows when SS will be allowed to come to our home again........... at PBFH's whim once again!!!!!!

This is so hard because I lost my grandmother the day after Thanksgiving and she had already bought everyones Christmas Gift for this year before passing away. Tonight we are to go to Grandma's (my mother lives in Grandmas house now) and open gifts from grandma that she bought before passing away. SS was supposed to be a part of this evening and now he doesn't get to be. He wasn't allowed (by PBFH) to attend the funeral. He was upset about not being able to go but there is only so much DH can do.


The only thing that keeps us going is that our final hearing is coming up in Feb. I hope and pray that the judge can see ALL the hurt and pain this PBFH has caused DH and our children as well as her own child!!!!!!!!


Please remember our family in your prayers...........This was supposed to be our FIRST Christmas with SS and he is 8 years old!!!!!!!!! We are all hurting and grieving in our own ways so please remember us in your prayers!!

[MYSONSDAD]

Me too....

Another denial. I don't have other children that can be affected, so I can just imagine what your children are going thru. It has devasted my entire family unit and we will wait when he can be here.

And your DH needs to get this out.

It blows my mind how they continue to play these games at the price of the children.

And grieving is a good way to put it. It is like losing a loved one only it is harder to come to terms with a situation like this. You can't put any peace and acceptence to it. And no end in sight...

You have my thoughts and prayers and all the other families that are suffering from the hands of a spiteful PBFH.

[kiddosmom]

I am SO sorry for this happening, it is horrible.

We are on the other end. SD's mother has yet to contact us to let us know if she is going to come pick up SD for her x-mas visitaion. She has skipped the last 2 visitations without even bothering to call.


God Bless and lots of Hugs!

[wendl]

I personally don't think the courts take into consideration any other children, my husband got reduced time trying to protect his kids, my son misses his stepbrothers even though they are younger and drive him nuts at time, but he still loves them like his own.

This year my son is with his dad and my stepsons are with their mother so dh and I will spend a relaxing day alone.

We will be praying for you and yours during this holiday season, extra hugs to all your kids from me.

[MYSONSDAD]

Children come with two parents. Each one has a family unit. Grandparents, aunts, uncles, neices, nephews, step family, the list goes on. When one of the members is not there on a regular basis, it effects all of them to some degree. I think the other children are effected the most. Maybe it is because they are closer in age. They share more in common.

Courts need to recognize it is not just the parents emotionally involved, but a broad connection to others.

[Stepmom0418]

Last night we had the family gathering at my grandma's.........things there went pretty well considering grandma passed away last month.


Grandma's home is about a 10 minute drive from PBFH. DH decided that he wanted to take a drive and see what was going on in the tiny town. Well we now know what PBFH has been hiding. SHE MOVED!!!!!!! Dont know where but she is no longer living in the house she was living in!!!!!! It is empty as can be. We think but cant prove yet that she is residing with her mother once again. Nothing has been reported to us or the courts about the move either.

DH attorney is out till Jan 3rd but I did leave a message and they are regular about checking messages. Hopefully we will hear from them soon.


We are supposed to get SS tomorrow night for a 7 day period. We aren't holding our breath but we are doing alot of praying!!

As for the courts considering our other kids in this I am not sure they will either but DH and I at least will testify to what it causes at our home when PBFH denys visits.

MSD thank you for all of your kind words!!!! Thank you to the rest as well!

[MYSONSDAD]

Did you get him?

I would either have the police or sheriff do a welfare check and have them document that she is no longer living there, or go back and take pictures. Or, scrape up something to send return receipt, registered mail. Would give you 3rd party documentation she is no longer living there.

Does she have to keep your DH informed on moving and notifying him of where SS is? If so, I would think that would be contempt.

Prayers going your way...

"Children learn what they live"

[MYSONSDAD]

"Children learn what they live"

[StPaulieGirl]

My condolences to you and your family on the loss of your grandma.  Holidays are difficult enough after a recent death in the family without also having to deal with a pb.

You and your family are in my prayers.  I hope that by the time you read this, your SS will be with you guys eating Xmas leftovers ;-)

[Stepmom0418]

SS is here!!!!!!!!!YIIIIIPPPPEEEEEEE!!!!

We opened gifts tonight and all is well!! This is great to see everyone so happy!!

PBFH didn't even mention Christmas Eve and Dh kept his mouth shut because he wanted to get out of there with SS!!!!

SS had a tid bit of info for DH about 2 minutes after getting into the van and going down the road. (He must of been told that he couldn't tell DH) SS said that they are not staying in "their house" and are staying at his SF parents home due to not having any heat in their home and the water pipes have froze up.

Ok heres the deal........DH is fighting for physical custody and the final trial is Feb 9th and 10th. There are ALOT of reasons and grounds for the custody fight such as school, drugs, and ect.

Would not having heat in the home that SS is suposed to be living in be grounds for an emergency hearing?? What do we need to get an emergency hearing on this? The only place in the school distric that SS could stay is with his grandma whom just got out of rehab and was recentally found guilty on a drug charge. Not a safe place for SS to be living.

Any advise??

[MYSONSDAD]

Sounds like you had a great Christmas! Doesn't matter when you spend Christmas. It is the time together that is the important thing!

SO, no heat, water and granny got busted for drugs. WOW

A call to your attorney would be very appropriate....

Keep us posted!

[Bolivar]

"The only place in the school distric that SS could stay is with his grandma whom just got out of rehab and was recentally found guilty on a drug charge."


You can get a court date for this, but you will need more info.

Like a long list of "How this is negativity effecting the child".


As for not having heat.  Why do they not have heat?

You may not change custody status with this, but you may be able to have SS live with you.  This will/may set precedence with the court as to living arrangements.

[Stepmom0418]

We aren't sure exactly why they have no heat. SS said that their landlord took their furnace and that the landlord is going to buy a new furnace when he gets their rent money. (she is on low rent housing and the majority  of the rent is paid by hud or section 8 )

We put a call into DH attorney but attorney is out untill Jan 3rd. It does say on the voicemail that they will be checking messages and returning calls. Hopefully they will call soon!!!!!!


I dont really know what the attorney will think of this new mess of things but I guess I will see when they call. Wish us luck and in the meantime we are just going to enjoy SS cause he is here and safe and sound!!!!!