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Currently, the AG is handling the case. I am required to respond to them with any questions or information, until it goes to court. Once it goes to court, it is out of their hands.

I am not currently closer to the children, but I did move equidistant from our previous home.

Well, after speaking with the AG office in her state, I don't feel any better.  It's all up to the judge. If the judge thinks we have a valid reason, great!! If not, and if it's a mom friendly judge, then I will have to pay the original amount....which will be the entirety of my net monthly income.  I don't really understand how that is acceptable or better for the children, but I guess I don't get to have an opinion.

Oh. She left the state first, two weeks after our divorce, and took the children with her.

My current wife and I found a home for a good price in a nice area. There were no jobs in the state we were living in, so my current wife had been unemployed for a year after a lay-off. There were jobs in the state we moved to, and both of us have been working since we came to the new area. It was a better move for the entire family. We have more room for all the children and a significantly lower mortgage payment.

Simply Dad,

How can that be possible, if the child support amount will be more than my net income?

My new wife and I moved out of state and bought a home in a better area. The cost of living is lower here, but the pay is, also. This is the reason for the job change. Will that matter?

I am not behind. I've paid every month since my job change, but I show in arrears on the original amount as the modification has now taken nine months, and could possibly take 6 more.

The divorce decree states she claims two children each year and I claim two children each year. We have 4 children. Travel, per the divorce decree, is the responsibility of each person. I pay one way, she pays the other.

We did not agree to anything, but recently heard certain states can refuse to lower your child support if you chose to take a lower paying job. This is mostly what I'm worried about it. My child support would equal my income and I don't know how we'd make it on that.

I provided my paystubs in February, the state determined a new amount based on those, but in her state, she has the right to protest the amount determined. It's very odd to me.

Hello, everyone!! I have looked all over the internet for information regarding child support awards.

As previously explained, I currently pay 50% of my income in child support. My original order for support was at 35%;  however, my income was cut in half, and I filed for a modification. The modification was filed 9 months ago. The ex refused to agree to the amount, and now we are faced with a court date, wherein she has the opportunity to present her case for deserving the original amount ordered, regardless of the decrease in my income.

She has also, in this 9 months, attempted to extort money from me by offering to accept 50% of my income in child support, if I would pay for all transportation costs to and from her state (amounting to several thousand dollars a year) as well as allowing her to claim all of our children on her tax returns regardless of what is in our divorce decree.

Is there any way a NCP can stop the train from running right over them? As it stands now, I bring in between $300 and $400 every two weeks. There has to be something I can do to keep my new family from starving. Any thoughts?

Thank you in advance.

I agree 100%....unless, of course, one is struggling to buy milk, eggs, and toilet paper. 

There's just no extra money. We are now living payday to payday and coming up short at the end of every week. And, we don't do "extravagant" things. We have no home phone, no internet, no cable. We don't eat out. None of us have had new clothes in months, not even socks. The animals can't go to the vet. We have no lawnmower, even.

We went from doing really well and being able to afford fun things and trips to barely being able to eat. We've had several weeks in a row where we're surviving on sandwiches and kool aid. It's bad news, man.

He does have access to school records, which is great. We do send cards, letters, and gifts. The kids sometimes send letters back, if Mom will provide them with stamps. We bought quite a few stamps and envelopes at Thanksgiving so they'd have supplies available, but strangely they're all gone now.

Thank you all very much for your advice. I think when we are further along we will see about going the court route, but for now, we simply can't afford to drive to Utah to go to court each time she does something wrong. I looked into the contempt filings and from everything I've been able to find, it seems WE have to appear if we file a contempt charge...so that's out, too.

I guess for now we'll just wait and see. Hopefully, we'll get to see the kids this summer, even if it's just a day or so.

The kids range in age from 7-13. Per the divorce decree, they are supposed to have email accounts set up solely for the purpose of emailing H, but she doesn't allow them on the computer.  He provides a cell phone for them, so they may talk. Sometimes, he gets them. Sometimes, he doesn't. The kids tend to misplace the phone or forget to charge it and she is hands off, saying it's not her responsibility. He does have the home number, but I've seen him leave messages on both phones for a week and never get a response. I don't think she tells the kids that he calls.

He filed through the state. He didn't have any choice, as she filed a request for child support with the State, originally. As far as the legal route, we simply don't have the money for it. We thought we MIGHT have it for the mediation, but it turns out we will not. So, that's out, too. I suppose she's smarter than I give her credit for.  If she completely bankrupts him, she's got a pretty good chance he'll never take her to court, because he can't afford it. So, we're left with me looking to get a second job just to make ends meet.

It's completely insane. I had no idea there were women that acted this way, and I certainly had no idea that dads could get the shaft like this. In MY particular case, when my ex didn't pay child support, the state didn't care. I can recall being told by the AG's office that I should consider myself lucky for getting ANYTHING when I called because he was very behind. He was up to 2 years behind at one point, and they didn't do anything to him. Nothing. When he finally started paying again, they added $17 a week to his payment and that was it.  He never carried insurance, either, and I was told I'd simply have to pay for medical bills myself and then submit a request for a 50% reimbursement. As they couldn't even make him pay child support, I decided it wasn't prudent to waste my time.