Yes, he is on the birth certificate. Obtaining the school records, health records, etc. from when he had custody of the child won't be a problem either. You mentioned proving neglect, do you think it would carry sufficient weight if we were able to prove there's recreational drug use such as marijuana or ecstasy? As for proving the mother has moved residence so often, any suggestions on how to obtain that information since I suspect she's been using her mother's address as the address of record for the child's school? Also, he's provided child care for the child since birth and the cost has never been shared, would that be considered a gift as well? The money he's provided has never been cash and often either a bank to bank transfer or check (which states the purpose of the money), could that still be deemed as a gift?
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#2
Custody Issues / Re: Advice Anyone??
Jan 10, 2010, 11:46:57 AM
Unfortunately there has never been a legal custody order/agreement. As for sending money directly to the school, he just recently started doing that. The child was attending a private school before the Christmas break and in casual conversation with the child it was uncovered that she didn't attend the school we were initially informed of. In addition to that, when the mother was questioned about the school (after many "stories) she finally admitted that the child had been removed from the private school and would be attending a public school. Therefore, she switched the child's school, in the middle of the school year without ever consulting my husband. Thanks for the advice about contacting the school to obtain report cards...we'll definitely be doing that on Monday morning.
#3
Custody Issues / Advice Anyone??
Jan 09, 2010, 06:27:57 PM
I'm not sure where to begin really but rather than bore you with unnecessary details I'll attempt to get straight to the heart of the matter. My husband has a 7 year old daughter who resides with her mother (husband was never married to child's mother) in Texas. Ever since the child was born my husband has provided ALL financial support for the child's needs, wants, or otherwise and at one point supported the child's mother also.
My husband currently lives out of the country and at some point the mother asked him to care for the child while she "got herself together" and allowed the child to attend school out of the country. When she became aware that I was in the picture she decided that she no longer wanted the child to be with my husband and has consequently had custody of the child since then (approx. June 2008).
There are issues regarding this woman's responsibility, stability, and overall desire to do what's best for the child. In the past the mother has been given money to pay for the child's extra-curricular activities or vacations but decided to do otherwise with the money. She has been dishonest about the school the child attends and had my husband sending her money for the child's tuition when the whole time she was attending public school. There's also the issue that the mother is an excessive party-goer.
When she picks the child up from school on a Friday evening, rather than take the child home to spend the weekend with her, her routine is to drop the child off with a family member or friend so that she can go out. Now, this isn't every other weekend or on occasion only, this is EVERY weekend, unless she's sick. In the past 3 years she has moved at least 6 times and the child has attended at least 3 different schools. She's also changed jobs several times within the last 3 years as well.
When my husband refuses to do exactly as she wishes she won't answer his calls or allow him or his family to spend time with the child. Just last week she actually said that she wouldn't allow him to see the child if he didn't give her the money she wanted. He went to see an attorney who said that he stands a fair chance of gaining custody but Texas is a state that usually sides with the mother and that he may have to hire a private investigator.
There are so many more issues to add to this equation but I'm looking for help and advice from anyone who has been through a similar situation or who may be able to shed some light on what steps we should take at this point. My husband is extremely busy but I too think the child would be better off with us and I want to do the leg work necessary to exhaust all resources.
My husband currently lives out of the country and at some point the mother asked him to care for the child while she "got herself together" and allowed the child to attend school out of the country. When she became aware that I was in the picture she decided that she no longer wanted the child to be with my husband and has consequently had custody of the child since then (approx. June 2008).
There are issues regarding this woman's responsibility, stability, and overall desire to do what's best for the child. In the past the mother has been given money to pay for the child's extra-curricular activities or vacations but decided to do otherwise with the money. She has been dishonest about the school the child attends and had my husband sending her money for the child's tuition when the whole time she was attending public school. There's also the issue that the mother is an excessive party-goer.
When she picks the child up from school on a Friday evening, rather than take the child home to spend the weekend with her, her routine is to drop the child off with a family member or friend so that she can go out. Now, this isn't every other weekend or on occasion only, this is EVERY weekend, unless she's sick. In the past 3 years she has moved at least 6 times and the child has attended at least 3 different schools. She's also changed jobs several times within the last 3 years as well.
When my husband refuses to do exactly as she wishes she won't answer his calls or allow him or his family to spend time with the child. Just last week she actually said that she wouldn't allow him to see the child if he didn't give her the money she wanted. He went to see an attorney who said that he stands a fair chance of gaining custody but Texas is a state that usually sides with the mother and that he may have to hire a private investigator.
There are so many more issues to add to this equation but I'm looking for help and advice from anyone who has been through a similar situation or who may be able to shed some light on what steps we should take at this point. My husband is extremely busy but I too think the child would be better off with us and I want to do the leg work necessary to exhaust all resources.
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