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How can I get support when I can't even locate my ex?
The government child support agency is responsible for locating them. This includes address, employment or source of income. The agencies do this through federal and state parent locator services.
There are additional ways to locate your ex, some of which are detailed in this article: Locating a ''Missing'' Ex-Spouse.
My ex never told me I had a child, and concealed the fact for over a decade. Will this be taken into account when they set my support amount?
Unfortunately, probably not. The court routinely allows this kind of thing to take place and rarely sanctions the mother for doing so. Although she may have deliberately concealed the very fact of the child's existence from you, she will almost certainly not be held accountable for it.
You, on the other hand, may be penalized for her bad behavior. You may be assessed a substantial sum of back child support, possibly all the way back to the day the child was born. The "arrears" will be applied immediately, regardless of the fact that you were unaware that you even had a child.
You will also, more than likely, be labeled a "deadbeat dad" and forced to pay the back support plus interest. You should contact an attorney immediately to discuss this, and the possible future ramifications.
Can child support be reduced if you remarry and have more children by your new wife?
That depends a lot on your state support guidelines. Check those guidelines and see if they allow consideration of other children.
As a rule, however, judges are extremely reluctant to REDUCE an existing obligation for children entering the picture after that obligation was in place. They figure that you already knew you had to support the existing children when you had the new ones, and should have taken that into consideration.
In other words, the new children might help in preventing an INCREASE in support, but it's unlikely a judge would allow a DECREASE because of new children.
How is a support order established if paternity hasn't been determined and no documents have been signed by me?
Quite often support enforcement or the prosecuting attorney will act on an allegation that you are the father. They figure if you are not the father, you will be motivated to prove it. This is a blatant abuse of power, but is often justified it by saying that it's "for the sake of the children".
Quite often they will get a default judgement against you for child support, claiming they don't know where you are, then wait to locate you until they have the order and need to collect the child support.
Your best defense is to get an attorney and insist on a DNA test for paternity. Approximately 1/3 of men who contest paternity through a DNA test are later determined to not be the real father.
I was laid-off, and my unemployment benefits are nowhere near what I used to make. Can I get my child support postponed or lowered? How do I keep my job loss from counting as a strike against me?
You can indeed petition for a reduction in your support amount. Get the required forms from your local courthouse as soon as you possibly can and file for a reduction.
Some judges will grant them and some won't. Don't get your hopes up- a lot of judges won't care why you can't pay, no matter what the reason.
As for keeping your job loss from becoming a strike against you, maintain an active search for employment and document every effort or application. Be able to show that you're actively (even vigorously) seeking work.