Bipolar Son

[Forgotten Father]

Ok my son is diagnosed bipolar and my ex says that his behavioral therapist suggested that his mother mirror my sons behavior (If he throws a fit...she throws a fit) so that he will see how ridiculous he looks and that they rearrange his bedroom furniture and the house furniture every time he goes to visit a friend overnight or comes for visitation so that he will always be in a state of "getting used to all the new" so he will not act out.

Have you ever heard of anything like that?

It doesn't make sense to me and in fact upsets me.  I feel like most of his "therapy" involves degrading him and making him feel out of control of his own life.

My son has been in JDC for the past 50 days and will be coming home next week and his mother is working frantically to make sure that he does not recognize his own home.

I feel like moving all his stuff when he is gone all the time will be an invasion to him (he is 13) and make him even more uncomfortable in his home.

As far as the mirroring his behavior that sounds like mocking to me and I tell ya if I was angry and people started imitating me I would not stop and think of how stupid I looked...It would make me freak out.

I would appreciate any opinions on this or if anyone has heard of this type of treatment please I would like to hear from you.

Thank you

Forgotten Father

[littlebit]

Forgotten Father,

This is my opinion only...Get a second opionion!  Even if it is just you going to talk to another therapist without your son being there.  At least you would get an idea of how far off base these suggestions might be.


If the child had the proper thought process to be able to rationalize 'how ridiculous he looks', there would be no problem to begin with.  This applies not only to your son, but to any child!  I assure you, my son has thrown plenty of fits, and mirroring his behavior will accomplish nothing but making me look like a child and!


I agree with ya.  Has there been any prior episodes of "getting used to all the new" causing better behavior?  If so, what can it hurt?  But if not, seems like it would just make life harder for him than it already is.

Good luck and keep us posted on the progress!

Fellow Father

[lennar_girl]

As the step mom of a bipolar child, and many many hours in therepy, I have never heard of such thing.  If you do any research on bipolar, you will find it is caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain.  

I understand that you can try and encourage good behaviour.  Have you ever seen you child in a manic state?  The reason I ask is because they will explain it as everything going to fast, as if their brain can't stop.  They can also explain it as "chaotic".  My opinion and it is just that, she isn't helping the child a bit.  You try and keep them calm, not cause them to become upset by mocking them or moving furniture, and possible having a manic episode.

Is the child on medication?  Can you get a second opinion from another licensed therepist?  Good luck.

[Dr. D]

Dear Forgotten Father,

It sounds as though you have truly been left out in this case. Let me address some things.

THe mirroring of behavior is not ALL bad, but is generally done under the direct supoersion of a trained therapist and for very specific reasons, and under very specific circumstances.  I am not sure what the purpose behind rearranging his room would be.  Have you asked his mother to explain the reasoning behind all of this?

More importantly, to me at least, why is this child in a detention center?  THat is NOT in response to bipolar behavior?  Sounds as though something else is going on here, and SOMEONE is trying to medicalize it.  Thirteen is a very rough age!  How involved are you and can you be in his life?  He needs to see positive and consistent role models, with a very fair yet defined set of boundaries for acceptable behaviors.

Try to talk with the therapist and perhaps the counselor at the JDC.  From there, get your son involved in a positive role modeling environment.  
Dr. D